Did I handle this situation properly or should I have not said anything?

[FourLittleDudes]

Involves FB sorry!

I was flicking through and saw that a friends 12/13 year old daughter had commented on a photo of a boy who attends her school calling him a 'retarded spaz'. There were several comments from other pupils calling him names and being horrible.

My first thought was to comment on the photo to ask her why she was using such awful language and telling her she was a bully, but decided that wouldn't help so text her mum (my friend) saying:

Hi, how are you, lovely weather, I think I must be getting old as I just saw xxx commenting on a photo of a kid calling him a rxxxxx sxxx and I nearly commented on it that I didn't think she was a bully and didn't to read that sort of thing from her. Fancy meeting for coffee next week? xx

That was last night, she didn't reply and the comment is still there. I wouldn't be happy if it was one of my dc that had written it and wouldve made them remove it. Should I have ignored it? Worded the text differently?

But luckily my friend knows me well enough to see that I was trying to be helpful. She is having a rough time and I am going round for a coffee and a chat, see if I can cheer her up.

Its not about causing trouble for the girl, its about trying to look out for the boy. She has a choice to bully, he has no choice in being bullied.

Sorry Rhubarb but IME teenagers know exactly what these words mean. They also know all about social media bullying.

It is the responsibility of anybody who sees bullying to try and stop it if they can.

She has a choice to bully, he has no choice in being bullied.

Well put FourLittleDudes

Of course she knows what it means. OP isn't being a busybody, just trying to do the right thing - which is to be applauded imo as to many people just wouldn't bother.

I came on to say about your text message but now think that your phone call went 100% better than the text, you were honest with her about going to the school. You acknowledged she is going through a hard time and are going to support her.

The daughter needs to be taught the consequences of bullying. Well done