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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To not take my child on the very occasional trip in the car without a car seat?

30 replies

KenAdams · 06/06/2013 12:27

People sometimes suggest that they will pick me up from places (I don't drive) often tell me I'm overreacting when I refuse a lift because they don't have the car seat with me. DD is in her next stage carseat so I can't take it with me. I've come back on the bus before in the pouring rain because I've refused a lift and been told that I'm being PFB. I just know that the one time I did it, something would happen.

OP posts:
dexter73 · 06/06/2013 12:29

I thought you were only allowed to put a child in a car without a carseat in emergencies so I think YANBU. Better to get a bit wet than risk a crash.

FobblyWoof · 06/06/2013 12:29

You are not being PFB. Anyone who suggests otherwise is an idiot

PicaK · 06/06/2013 12:45

It doesn't really need saying but...

...YANBU

RugBugs · 06/06/2013 12:52

YANBU

The amount of babies/children I see sitting on laps in cars around here scares me.
I'm currently having 'discussions' with DPs family about 2yr old DD not going in a wedding car with her 4yr old cousin because it has no seatbelts, apparently the fact that it's old and won't do more than 40 makes it safe Hmm

meddie · 06/06/2013 12:54

Dont risk it.

pizzaqueen · 06/06/2013 12:56

YABNU. You would be breaking the law and putting your DC life in danger to do so.

I realise it must be a right pain sometimes but you are doing the right thing.

gallifrey · 06/06/2013 12:57

My friend once had a bit of a moan at me because I wouldn't give her and her 2 children a lift home in my 4 seater car! There would have been 5 of us in it so 1 child with no seat belt on. She said it was ok and her smallest child could sit in the front footwell with her!

Amazinggg · 06/06/2013 12:58

YANBU. I don't drive although noone ever offers me a lift and I just walk and get public transport everywhere. I do occasionally get a taxi if it's not practical to get bus or whatever, it's legal to have a baby on your lap in a taxi but not in a car. (Though not very safe, I ask the taxi driver to go super carefully and only ever for shortish journeys) And I justify the cost by not running a car.

roofio87 · 06/06/2013 13:00

YANBU!! I'm expecting my pfb and will definitely be taking the same stance as you!! stick to your guns, its your child's life at stake!!

WilsonFrickett · 06/06/2013 13:02

YANBU. It's worth reminding pushy drivers that they'd be liable for the points/fine if they were stopped by the police - not the parent of the child. That usually concentrates the mind Wink

FreudiansSlipper · 06/06/2013 13:07

YANBU

A bit of rain, wind or snow will not harm a child we all know what can happen to a child in an accident without a car seat

Pobblewhohasnotoes · 06/06/2013 13:09

It's not worth the risk.

ICBINEG · 06/06/2013 13:10

yanbu

MissMarplesBloomers · 06/06/2013 13:10

And also I always say it's not you it's the other silly buggers on the roads I worry about......YANBU

Morgause · 06/06/2013 13:10

Does she sit on your lap on the bus?

How is that any more safe than on your lap in a car?

Annabel7 · 06/06/2013 13:10

I'm not advocating doing it, however, I would probably do it if it was chucking down with rain rather than take the bus. They're not strapped in or any safer on the bus it's just that it's not illegal...

Original poster
KenAdams · 06/06/2013 13:27

No never Morg she stays in her pushchair strapped in no matter how much she complains.

I walk or get the bus to most places. I know the weather might not always be great but that's just what I have to deal with as I don't drive. They don't seem to understand that I'm fine in the rain - Ihave a rain cover for the pushchair and appropriate footwear!

OP posts:
YBR · 06/06/2013 14:02

IIRC you can legally not use a child carseat in (1) and emergency and (2) where you have 3 kids in the back of a small car and there isn't the space for 3 carseats. I wasn't aware of the taxi exemption but that makes sence.
It is never BU to refuse to break the law.
In other things consider the relative risk: how likely is it that you and your DC will be involve in an accident as a pedestrian and how severe could the consequences be? I have no data but guess you're more vulnerable in the bus and on the pavement but it's less likely.

eccentrica · 06/06/2013 16:54

morgause it is far safer on the bus. Not the same thing at all hence no laws about it

Startail · 06/06/2013 17:02

If your DC is still pushchair sized you are totally not being unreasonable.

I have, very occasionally got my tallest DD to use the seat belt only because I can't get 3 cars eats across the back, but not until she was using a booster cushion and about 7/8

IKnowWhat · 06/06/2013 17:05

YANBU

...Obviously Smile

ouryve · 06/06/2013 17:07

YANBU.

My boys are bigger now and DS1 doesn't officially need one - in reality, he needs a booster cushion in a lot of cars, as the seatbelts cut across his throat. DS2 has a few inches to go, yet. I've only recently reached the point where I've become happy to accept a lift in the pouring rain with them and then I insist on sitting next to DS2.

specialsubject · 06/06/2013 17:07

as far as I know, no child ever dissolved in the rain.

jacks365 · 06/06/2013 17:08

www.childcarseats.org.uk/law/

I'll assume your child is under 3 so the only car she would be allowed without a carseat is a licencsed taxi or private hire car. You are not being pfb to refuse to break the law. Stick to your guns.

SpecialAgentTattooedQueen · 06/06/2013 17:10

YANBU.

Anyone who doesn't use a car seat is a twat.