To think there are few things in life as frustrating as feeding a toddler

[MrsLyman]

aaaaaargh. I am screaming here because if I do so in real life I'll scare the neighbours.

I honestly think that if you're getting upset and angry, then that's not going to make mealtimes pleasant for anyone.

Toddlers can survive on surprisingly little food so please try not to stress. I just used to let mine get on with it - they always ate when they were hungry and stopped when they were full. They still do.

I feel your pain. I'm on my fourth coffee of the morning....

Why ? I have kids with eating probs. what's going on?

(I put peanut butter instead of cheese on the toast- cue epic meltdown)

Oh yes I see. Coming up to terrible twos ?

I used to care about how much the toddler ate. Not now though. He eats when hes hungry. I know what he will eat so I make sure I have that in. He likes picnic lunches where he has a bit of everything to pick at. Hes not a hot dinner person but neither am I

on a more serious note, I think food issues are very common at this age and probably one of the few aspects of their life they control.

my ds eats well but it's a veg refuser at present so no veg will poss his lips of he can see it. I have taken the approach of having visible veg and 'stealth' veg hiddenin sauces. I encourage him to try everything and praise Good eating but ignore silly behaviour and veg refusal. it is hard tho as things they eat one day are complete no nos the next!

I loathe feeding kids of all ages. My toddler is a good eater but has taken to wandering off halfway through his food. Older daughter says she likes XYZ and I do her one of them, then she finds a reason why it isn't what she wanted and she doesn't like it this particular time. I could scream.

it's massively draining tho (just had another meltdown because the banana he was eating had a bruise)

I'm not upset and angry, and am doing my best to present an outward face of serene and calm, I'm just finding this 'no not like' phase a bit trying. the ignore ignore ignore advice is great but I find following it requires me to fight all my natural instincts which are to make sure my child is well fed. It's always reassuring to hear others have similar experiences.

I think this lunchtime I may be a victim of my own smugness DS1 helped me prepare lunch whilst DS2 was napping and I thought 'he's bound to eat this as he enjoye helping so much'

Lyman Helping you make doesn't mean they eat it. I tried that thinking I had outsmarted him

I just put it down and leave him to it. He sometimes wonders off but he comes back to it. He prefers cold food

yes it can be frustrating. I worry more about the quality of the food they eat rather than quantity. I don't really care how much they eat, that depends on how hungry they are, but when they are rejecting healthy foods I get frustrated!

It is common for toddlers to eat very little and go through fussy phases though.

I wish i could say it gets better, but my 12y is still a pain.

DD1 and I sneaked off for tapas in half term, while she was at a friends. It's was so nice not to be stuck with somewhere with a dull as dishwater option for DD2.

DS1 also prefers cold food, we've had many many crying fits over vaguely warm chicken goujons. If had his way he'd eat nothing but yoghurt, strawberries and pasta, which at least is made with hidden veg sauce. tries to ignore the little voice pointing out he does basically have his way

The toddler (3) has picnic lunches now. Cold pasta, cold chicken, ham, cheese, coleslaw and cucumber all on a plate and he will eat it eventually. Pasta is his favourite as is garlic bread.

Give him warm pasta and he will wait for it to be cold before eats it.

I feel your pain! I find it's a lot less frustrating if I cook what I want to eat and then at least I get to enjoy my lunch, and anything he eats is a bonus, rather than going out of my way to cook something he might like only to find he's changed his mind and I don't like it that much either!

YANBU OP, it's incredibly frustrating. What really gets me is you think you have a sure thing when they've loved something before and next time you try it they won't touch it. Drives me mad.

Currently my 2 year old is writhing on the sofa, munching cucumber whilst glaring at me out the corner of his eye. He's taken to avoiding most carbohydrates - no bread, crackers, pasta, potato etc will pass his lips and I have offended him by leaving a cheese sandwich on his plate along with all the other bits and pieces. ah well!

DS has lived on mainly pasta with pesto or veg sauce and fish fingers and beans for a bit over a year. He has in the last couple of months started to try a few new things - yesterday he a chicken shwarma at a restaurant and today he had a cheese, salad and grated carrot pita bread for lunch I hope that gives you a bit of hope!

He's nearly 4 btw. And he ate just about anything up until he was 2, so I guess it closer to 2 years of pasta and fish fingers!

When DD was a very fussy toddler, there were many times when I thought I might as well just scrape dinner into the kitchen bin, rather than make a plate dirty.

OP, I also have a very fussy toddler who has only 3-4 things on the "edible" list. But he is healthy and happy and rather chubby. I just don't care. We always offer him food that we eat ourselves, he always refuses, but I am sure one day something will click and he will start eating as civilised person should.

If you toddler is healthy and happy and is not eating too much junk, then I think it's ok. It's not like you can force them to eat, so why worry?

Also, toddlers are not babies. It's ok for them to starve a bit when you just don't have anything they like.

Can anyone tell me why DD (2 yo) has taken to screaming, "nooooo " at me when I put her plate down? I have never tried to force, encourage or cajole her into eating anything. I just say, "I know, don't eat it" but the drama is getting wearing. Particularly as she eats it later and demands more when it is all gone because I thought she hated it. She is a very good eater, I feel sorry for the rest of you.

I actually loathe eating with DD (3.5) and am very glad she's now in nursery for 3 lunches and 3 teas a week! There are very few meals she will eat unaided, I still have to read books and spoonfeed a lot of the time (she is perfectly capable of feeding herself). Even when she does it herself she is unbelievably slow - I can have eaten and washed up by the time she's had half a bowl of whatever. I didn't use to be too concerned, but she is now playing up at bedtime and saying she's hungry, which I think could sometimes be the case, and ending up not dropping off until 9.30, so I really do want her to have a decent meal.

And it's the perversity that does me in, demolishing something one week, not touching it the next. Mealtimes more than anything challenge me as a parent, they stretch my patience and tolerance to the limit. I don't expect her to eat much and I know she's limited in what she'll have - that's fine. But anything beyond that does my head in.

And the cutlery banging! And the wailing and moaning! God, can't they come with a mute button?

MrsTerryPratchett, this is a great toddler mystery. Toddler logic follows rules that do not apply in the rest of the universe.

I am often very tempted just to put out a doggy bowl of serial or whatever in a corner of the kitchen for DS and just refill it when it's empty.