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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To think no one actually cares about pictures of my children on FB?

113 replies

Stripedmum · 01/06/2013 09:23

Be honest. Unless it's family do you really want to see thousands of pictures of other people's children if any?

I inundated the web with pictures of our first baby. Now I've had the second one I've decided not to...

Call me evil but I find pictures of other people's children boring and therefore don't want to annoy others with thousands of pictures of mine. I also think it's a bit insensitive to those who can't have kids: "Look at my beautiful children!". If you want to celebrate them why not print the pictures off and send them to loved ones/text them to people who are genuinely interested?

OP posts:
JumpingJackSprat · 01/06/2013 10:10

I dont mind the odd photo but the people on my wall that do this always have the "im so blessed to have my beautiful children/lovely husband/great job posts every single day. also "my child did hes just sooo clever." the two together makes me think these people need to get a grip.

BackOnlyBriefly · 01/06/2013 10:21

I don't mind either way about photos. As people said you can look or not. I thought that was what Facebook was for (there has to be some point to it)

I disagree with the idea that "it's a bit insensitive" to let people know you successfully had children. I've heard that from a few people and we need to nip that one in the bud.

What next? I don't think those who can't have kids would appreciate it if when they visited you told your kids to "hide or at least look unhappy".

Original poster
Stripedmum · 01/06/2013 10:25

Backonly - I think my point is that why do people feel the need to demonstrate how happy and delighted they are with their children? Can they not just think it and keep the sentiment to themselves?

It's like if I got a fabulous new job. Can I just not be happy and celebrate with loved ones?

OP posts:
beals692 · 01/06/2013 10:27

I've only got about 3 Facebook friends with young children so I've probably not got the same degree of baby fatigue as some people. My view would be:

  • A few photos are nice but I don't want to be bombarded with millions of them
  • If you want to post a lot of photos, put them in an album so that it appears as one item rather than the entire newsfeed being taken up with baby photos and me missing out on seeing updates from other friends
  • Post photos that include the parents - It's you that people are friends with, not the baby. That doesn't mean that people aren't interested in seeing the baby but, to be blunt, young babies tend to all look the same and we are only interested in it because it's connected to you.
  • Never, ever post photos of the contents of your child's nappy (Fortunately, none of my friends are that crazy but I know people who have had that kind of stuff pop up in their newsfeed.)
Ilovemyself · 01/06/2013 10:51

Stripedmum. Perhaps some people like to see how your children are getting on. Family and friends of ours love to see how our children are getting on. It's not showing how happy we are or anything like that. It is just sharing our children's growth with our friends.

Mia4 · 01/06/2013 10:51

YANBU, thousands of pics no. I only have close friends/family on my facebook and i love seeing the baby pictures for most-except one/ It's not that i don't want to see her pictures but she has one of these 'take multiple' pictures cameras (takes about 8 in a row) and daily she will update with dozens and dozens of photos, now it would be good if they were different ones but a lot are the 'take 8' ones so you end up with 30 pictures of X eating an ice cream-thankfully though only the first few show up on my feed. Annoyingly though she tags myself and half her fb in these photos so i end up with dozens of notifications per day!

Elquota · 01/06/2013 10:52

YANBU. Agree that Facebook is very "one size fits all". Much nicer to just email photos to a few people - it's not that hard to do!

MonstersDontCry · 01/06/2013 10:57

Before I had kids, I used to hate looking at pictures of other peoples kids. Now I have DD and am pregnant, I love it!

Because of that, I only post occasional pictures. Maybe 1 or 2 every 6 weeks or so.

TheSecondComing · 01/06/2013 10:57

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

quesadilla · 01/06/2013 10:59

What Zillion said. I am genuinely interested in my friends/family's kids and happy to see in moderation,

But plastering endless very similar pictures of your kids up there is a little bit "me, me, me" and self indulgent,

Mind you I would be just as irritated by an endless surfeit of holiday snaps/school reunion pics to be honest.

Moderation is the key, it's not rocket science.

DebsMorgan · 01/06/2013 11:01

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

sweetestcup · 01/06/2013 11:05

I think my point is that why do people feel the need to demonstrate how happy and delighted they are with their children? Can they not just think it and keep the sentiment to themselves?

But why should they? Confused, I think your missing the point of facebook - its a social netweork site. I'm another that doesn't get your reasoning that posting pictures of your kids may be offensive to people who cant have children. Where would you draw the line.

stepawayfromthescreen · 01/06/2013 11:15

just to say anyone who unfriends or 'hides' someone cos they post too many photos of their kids is a miserable fucker.

MrsMook · 01/06/2013 11:21

I'd rather see pictures on FB than have people posting them to me- then I'd have the dilemma of where to keep the clutter or to bin them!

I share mine because childraising is the main focus of my life now. In a few years I'll be back to hiking pictures. I have a lot of distant family and friends who are interested, and I'm interested in their families/ lives.

Everyone has some bias to what they post be it children, drinking, sports (I get a lot of running times on mine) food... Some are more interesting than others. I find the main bit is about how you present the information. Some people make something mundane witty. Some make anything mundane.

Veryunsure · 01/06/2013 11:24

ynbu, I hide all my friends on fb with children who love to show their child's every waking moment. I'm just not interested, great for their families though I'm sure.

GoodbyePorkPie · 01/06/2013 11:25

A few is ok. Hundreds is overkill. My cousin posted hundreds and hundreds of pictures when she had her baby, even pictures of the baby's dirty nappies fgs.

I don't post any pictures of my DC on FB though anyway.

WafflyVersatile · 01/06/2013 11:28

I don't want my feed filled with any one friends posts whatever they are about.

I'd like more pics of my nieces tho.

stepawayfromthescreen · 01/06/2013 11:29

I think some people don't realise what Facebook is, what Facebook is for. If you can't post pics of your kids on it, for whatever reason, (and I'm assuming there's no court order) then don't be on it. Pointless really.

Elquota · 01/06/2013 11:29

People can always ask if they really want to see someone else's photos...

WafflyVersatile · 01/06/2013 11:30

And yabu about offending people who can't have kids.

HorryIsUpduffed · 01/06/2013 11:31

Most of my friends and family don't live near us. If I'm putting a zillion photos up I tend to change the privacy to "family only" so my former colleagues, school mums, etc don't get bombarded, though.

I went to a college reunion and got talking to a girl I hadn't seen in the flesh for three years, but who is on my FB. She made a point of saying how much she liked seeing my PFB growing up.

Daily Instagram is Hmm though, as are the people who label every single photo with "kuh gorgeous princess" and so forth. I prefer the "underpants on head" or "Dear God he found the Sudocrem pot" photos, rather than posed cuties.

stiffstink · 01/06/2013 11:34

I upload the odd one now and then, but I am selective.

I don't upload almost identical photos, thats dull and I have hidden a very good riend who does at least fifteen a week. Baby looking to the left, baby looking to the right, baby with eyes closed, baby looking to the left again. All taken within minutes of each other.

One cute photo here and there is bearable. A clogging upload of 15 almost identical photos is very PFB.

HollyBerryBush · 01/06/2013 11:37

I would have thought normal people only have friends and family on FB.

There the 'friend collectors' though, those who accept any random acquaintance they might have once met, or people they have vague memories of working with 30 years ago, and colleagues - just why would give your work environment an insight into your personal life?

Therefore you post things that appeal to you, your friends, family and not accept spurious friend requests. yes, I know, simplistic.

As for the fear of offending the childless. Well, unless you intend to never let your children see the light of day, or intend to take them out with bags over their heads, you are going to walk past 20 people every time you wander round a supermarket, who have fertility issues. None of whom are going to have an attack of the vapours and fall to the floor in a molten heap because they have seen a child.

FreudiansSlipper · 01/06/2013 11:38

I like seeing a few but not endless pictures of other peoples children are boring and I do not post pics of ds on fb I email a few pics to family every so often

stiffstink · 01/06/2013 11:39

I should say that I've hidden the husband of the friend because they both upload the fifteen identical pics, all individually, so you actually get thirty identical pics and its too much!

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