to expect the ground to swallow me up at a time like this

[iccarus]

Lovely sunny day today wasn't it? Maybe good to go the park you think? I thought so anyway, trundled along with ds1 (2.8) and ds2 (4months) we had been there 20 mins when ds1 had a paddy over playing bat n ball. I settled down to feed ds2 who had also started screaming, we were already getting some looks at this point. Ds1 then ran off while i was busy feeding i shouted for him to come bk, cue more looks. He does start to run bk but a few yards away he stops, pulls down pants and trousers and announces he is having a wee. then he squats down and shouts i need a poo too mummy. I scream noooo ds1, hastily put baby down on the rug and leg it towards him boob out. By the time i get to him he is halfway through. Ds2 is busy screaming after being unceremoniously dumped in the middle of dinner. For some reason i have no wipes in the change bag except for one, half dry already mucky from wiping his chocolate face earlier. I do my best to clean him up, put the now filthy wipe in a pocket of my bag [grim] and make the sharpest exit possible, leaving the offending poo behind with two nearby families staring in disgust and horror. Why did ground not open up and swallow me???? Anyone else any horror stories to tell, this one will stick with me for a while

wrt the dog poo comparisons.

when you take you dog to the park you and others fully expect it to shit there- so you are prepared with bags and you are prepared for the sight of it. not so much when you take your dcs to the park- that one sort of catches you and everyone else off guard so i think OP can be forgiven for being in a bit of a flustered state and not thinking straight.

i'll bet my last penny she'll be ready for it next time

btw- who else is eagerly awaiting the "i saw a toddler shit in the park today and the mother just left it there" thread?

Brought small child to work one day when I needed to interview - normally happy child screamed throughout (could be heard loudly though with colleague four offices away) and then I took her home on a packed commuter train. She promptly threw up all over the v smart guy next to her buggy and continued to vomit all over me for the rest of the journey. Longest 15 mins of my life. Will always send grateful thanks to the lovely commuters who helped and smiled rather than the ones who understandably looked revolted.

Yesterday someones 2 year old did a poo in the reception area of my daughter in law's hair salon. Would any Mumsnetters care to confess?

Well you can find comfort that most of us have a poo story too!!!

My DSs have exactly the same age gap so I feel for you OP. I potty trained DS1 while bf / weaning DS2 ( what was I thinking???!!). I recall the day when I was bf DS2 on sofa, DS1 marched in from the garden announcing he needed a poo NOW and started to pull his pants down. I just thought ' Well, I can't do a single damn thing and thank god the kitchen floor is Lino' and let him get on with it. Thankfully not in public like you though!!!

My best poo moment was at a very posh christening. We stood at the back in order to whip DS2 out if he got grouchy. He was only 3 months old. He then produced what can only be described as the most horrific smell I have ever had the misfortune to experience. We were about to nip out when the entire congregation turned around to face the font which I hadn't realised we were right next to while the baby's family walked up the aisle for the christening bit. The look of horror and disgust on the naice posh folk of the village is burned on my memory forever. They mustve hit a wall of smell. Some people actually gagged.

We sidled out muttering apologies and took the stinky wee beast with us.

Have a on me. Not much you could have done with no wipes, tissue or nappy bags. We all get caught out at one time or the other!
I will always remember the day my dd who had only just been potty trained, decided to lay in front of the swings and proudly announce infront of the whole park very loudly that she was going to wee. She had laid in it all and i had to walk home with her screaming and stinking of pee. I had forgotten a spare change of clothes!

When my DS was about 18 months,we were at a soft play centre. He was in the ball pit,having a great time.Then he toddled out,minus shorts and nappy,with a stinky brown bum.Cue an evacuated ball pit,several disgruntled kids, and one very embarrassed mum.

My most mortifying experience doesn't involve any vomit or poo.

My ds at age 2 was very sensitive to hot weather. One day on holiday we went in a café for lunch and I took our ds in the toilets to change his nappy. After I'd taken the nappy off, he became hysterically upset about the heat and I was completely unable to get a nappy on him or put any clothing back on him. Everyone in the café could hear him crying hysterically for ages and I was completely at a loss and very worried that he might be seriously ill.

I ended up coming out of the toilets carrying him, with him still being completely naked. Someone from the café offered to show us where a doctor's was - TBH I think they mainly wanted him out of their cafe - and we ran through the streets carrying a naked and hysterical 2.5 year old. I was trying not to cry. When we got there, ds immediately calmed down. The doctor examined him and said he didn't think there was anything wrong but hinted that I was the one with the problem as I was stressed and close to tears.

Ds was fine. I was mortified by the whole experience.

Some fab stories here, thanks for letting me know that im not alone. Aw man, feel really sorry for you and your ds. Kids can always make you look a fraud

Love the vomiting on the head. Thats what dads are for!!

Don't feel bad about the poo :) it was a horrible stressful time...!

My dd aged about 2 at the time did a poo at the local play group. She was just about potty trained and came out very excitedly declaring she'd found a potty in the Wendy house... I was a bit perplexed until she proudly presented me with a very carefully balanced poo on top of a very posh little sugar bowl. :)

She is 10 now and we occasionally still giggle about it!

Oops that was Jan not man

I'm 14 weeks preggo and I'm secretly looking forward to having similar stories of my own to tell