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AIBU?

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To think that this advert for an live in au pair is grossly underpaid?

318 replies

salsmum · 28/05/2013 13:01

I was just browsing on a job site and this advert came to my attention, AIBU to think that this is asking an awful lot of a potential au pair for £80 a week? Shock and I thought carers were underpaid!.

OP posts:
nightingalefloor · 28/05/2013 15:41

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FuckThisShit · 28/05/2013 15:41

Hours on duty: Au pairs can be on duty from 25 ? 35 hours per week if they are from an EU country. This is limited to 25 hours per week and 2 evenings per week if the au pair is from Bulgaria or Romania. These hours can be spread out over 5 days per week. Longer hours are usually referred to as ?au pair plus?. Many au pair agencies also offer ?Mother?s help? positions; this is not part of the traditional cultural exchange programme, as it usually involves longer hours and schedules can conflict with language classes.

Pocket Money: Pocket money must be minimum £70 per week for 25 hours, regardless of whether the minimum hours are worked. Many agencies recommend slightly higher pocket money. For 30 hours the minimum is £85.

Babysitting: Two evenings babysitting per week are included as part of the programme. Additional pocket money should be paid for any additional evenings.

Leisure time: The au pair?s schedule must provide sufficient time to attend language school, and the au pair shall receive two free days each week and should be offered one full weekend off per month.

Holidays: As from September 2010, BAPAA recommends 28 days holiday per 12 month period, including Public Holidays. Pocket money will be paid during this time. To calculate the holiday entitlement for less than a year, or for someone helping less than 5 days a week, click this useful link. The au pair should not be forced to take holiday to coincide with the family holiday. Holidays should be mutually agreed between host family and au pair.

UK Public Holidays: These are included in the recommended holiday and au pairs can either be given the day off or have a day off in lieu as part of their holiday allowance.

Light Housework: A list of suggested light housework tasks can be found below these guidelines.

Childcare: An au pair is not permitted to have continuous sole charge of children under the age of two.

Room and board: The au pair receives full room and board from the family throughout the stay. The au pair must have her own private room with a window and not be required to share with children, and she should be given facilities to study.

Travelling Costs: The au pair is required to pay their own travelling cost to and from the UK, unless the family chooses to fund this.

Insurance: EU au pairs visiting the UK do not need additional health insurance as they are entitled to use the National Health Service. The au pair may also wish to take out additional travel insurance to cover loss of belongings, repatriation in case of accident, death etc.

Language School and Costs: Au pairs must be given enough time to attend language school. There are many courses in the UK for EU members, which are more affordable due to government funding. These are usually ESOL classes. If an au pair chooses to go to a private school, they must bear their own cost, unless the family offers to fund this.

Written Offer: Each agency shall ensure that the au pair receives a written offer from the family covering pocket money, holidays and what help would be expected.

The host family: Each agency shall ensure that the family is suitable to host an au pair and understands the nature of the au pair programme, and that the au pair is there to help the family and is not in charge of the house.

List of housework tasks accepted as light housework:

Washing dishes, including loading and unloading dishwasher

Preparing simple meals for children

Keeping kitchen tidy and clean, including sweeping and mopping floors

Loading and unloading laundry into washing machine

Ironing for children

Putting washed clothes away

Vacuuming

Dusting

Making and changing children?s beds

Cleaning children?s bathroom

Everything to do with keeping their own room/bathroom clean and tidy

Light shopping (not the entire household shopping)

Walking and feeding pets

Emptying bins

This is from BAPPA and the guidelines have been pretty much these listed above for at least 20 years. You will find that it's pretty much the same for British girls au pairing abroad.

The first role is essentially as described less, of course, the horrible addition of what basically alludes to 'keep out of our way when not working'.

But the others are clearly trying to swerve getting and paying for a nanny which I find deeply unpleasant and akin to slave labour. Not acceptable however one dresses it up and they ought (but never will be) to be ashamed of themselves. How would they like their daughters to be treated like this?

I have had au pairs, as I mentioned earlier, and I'm horrified to see the second and subsequent adverts - I would be livid if one of my two older daughters (au pair age) were to find themselves working for families like these. Sadly I think that their posting of these advertisements shows that they are really rather unpleasant people.

calypso2008 · 28/05/2013 15:41

x-posts. Sorry nightingale Flowers

TheBigJessie · 28/05/2013 15:42

piprabbit Grin

TheRealFellatio · 28/05/2013 15:42

Oh. didn't realise that. didn't read the adverts Well, cheeky feckers then. Grin

The trouble is, if they are providing food and accommodation these ads will keep attracting young women from poor countries to come and work happily for that amount of money, because relatively speaking it's a good income when it's converted and sent home to the family. It happens all the time where I live in the middle east, (no income tax system or NI contributions to pay but you have to sponsor your employee to be in the country) but of course you cannot get away with it in the UK where there is minimum wage, tax and NI contributions to make. So this is how they are getting away with it. Calling it 'au pair' instead of nanny, and getting a full time nanny for a fraction of the cost. They will probably have no shortage of applicants. Especially as any canny girl knows that once she is in the UK she can probably find a way to stay independently.

Gobbolinothewitchscat · 28/05/2013 15:44

"We often spend weekends and holidays at a farmhouse in Herefordshire where you will be expected to carry out further light duties such as cow milking, animal husbandry and mucking out the pigs" Grin

Wossname · 28/05/2013 15:48
Shock
TheBigJessie · 28/05/2013 15:49

An au-pair for a set of six-month-old twins?

And "looking for someone with significant experience and a demonstrated natural ability with small children, cheerful, motivated, tidy, responsible, and with sound judgment to live in and care for our 3 children on a permanent/long-term basis. "

Why would anyone with significant experience of children and sound judgment apply for the job?!

Now that I have significant experience with children (I have twins! Grin)
I would want a significant salary to look after six-month-old twins and a three -year-old for 13 hours a day!

nightingalefloor · 28/05/2013 15:51

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nightingalefloor · 28/05/2013 15:53

Sorry, didn't read far enough up. Thanks calypso. I've known for a few years now, especially with DD it doesn't upset me as much as it did. It does make me think parenthood is wasted on these parents wanting 12 hours a day childcare plus weekends though.

Housewife2010 · 28/05/2013 15:58

This last mother needs a cleaner. She wants someone who loves cleaning to clean for 2 hours a day. Also, she doesn't work. Why has she had 3 children in quick succession if she can't look after them by herself?

calypso2008 · 28/05/2013 15:58

Gobbo!!! Grin animal husbandry!!
6 month old twins and a 3 year old - yikes - they ask for salary expectation, I dare someone to email asking if 700 pounds a week is acceptable.

Right, got to look at the latest from nightingale!

Wossname · 28/05/2013 16:05

People on an average income in a 'normal' part of the UK would never think to exploit employ someone like this - they pay for a nanny or, more often, nursery. Is it just the quite well off who feel that this is acceptable?

Apart from the total lack of decency it must take to think paying someone so little for so much work is ok, who the fuck thinks leaving babies/toddlers with a young, unknown and unqualified person is a good idea?

JenaiMorris · 28/05/2013 16:05

I was paid £200 p/m (in forrin money, as it was abroad).

In 1990!

Wossname · 28/05/2013 16:08

ooooo I was trying not to swear today Confused

TheBigJessie · 28/05/2013 16:09

calypso the parents of the twins and three-year-old would ideally prefer someone who can be more flexible than 11 hours (dunno why I typed 13 before) a day and "do longer hours when father is travelling".

OwlinaTree · 28/05/2013 16:11

The twins and 3 year old was a nanny position 2bf. But liked stipulation they should speak spanish and work for 11 hours a day. And the sahm with 3 kids - wtf? What is she doing all day long?

TheBigJessie · 28/05/2013 16:13

OwlinaTree I should read more carefully.

Gobbolinothewitchscat · 28/05/2013 16:14

At least when you were a nanny in Victorian/Edwardian times you had nursery maids to assist - along with the other household staff, cook etc.

I genuinely think I'd prefer the role of nanny in 1913 than these 2013 au pair roles.

nightingalefloor · 28/05/2013 16:15

The advert itself isn't very entertaining, but the title 'for two smiley little boys' made me want to puke Grin

www.gumtree.com/p/jobs/experienced-au-pair-needed-for-2-boys-west-london/1018670814 This one wants the au pair to take her 3 year old to doctors appointments! Shock

calypso2008 · 28/05/2013 16:15

Hold on - this last one's a corker. The mother is at home and it is easier to list what she doesn't want to do, she wants to do nothing at ALL:

School run
Any activity with the children
2 hours cleaning a day
Washing and ironing for the children
Anything to do with the children.
Cleaning up after the children
Putting the children to bed

I am surprised she hasn't added 'shag my husband' to the list.

She wants to look horsey and pretend she can ski.

KatyTheCleaningLady · 28/05/2013 16:17

If I had the money, I would have round the clock nannies. I would love to have someone around to help, and it wouldn't be a matter of not being with the kids. So, I don't judge wanting full time help.

I do judge being cheap, and my fantasy nannies don't do cleaning. That's for my fantasy housekeeper to do. Wink

TondelayoSchwarzkopf · 28/05/2013 16:18

James and Alexandra are very keen for the readers of Gumtree to know that they have a PRIVATE entrance, a Private Entrance damn you, not one of those communal foyers. Heaven knows why privacy is so important them when they've posted every detail of their lives online.

calypso2008 · 28/05/2013 16:18

No, I am just cracking up here. It is so funny. Grin

TheBigJessie · 28/05/2013 16:20

I'm impressed by "You should be able to communicate in French as well as English, with the boys (explaining right and wrong)". My emboldening.

Very specific.

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