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In being really really REALLY pissed off at those trying to stop same-sex marriage bill going through?

267 replies

StoicButStressed · 20/05/2013 15:28


My eldest DS is gay, I genuinely have NO concept or understanding of how anyone thinks he (or the other pretty significant % of our population who also happen to have been born gay?) should in any way be denied the same right as his two brothers have to be able to get married.

AIBU? Or is there something I am simply missing?

OP posts:
JamieandtheMagicTorch · 20/05/2013 17:26

More and more, I'm coming round to the idea that everyone should have a civil partnership.

Then a blessing in a religious place of their choosing if they want one.

(of course, that assumes that gay people will have a choice - mind you, I don't think I'd want to be blessed by a religion that doesn't welcome me)

That would put paid to all those hypocrites who get married in a church with no religious belief

Tee2072 · 20/05/2013 17:31

Nothing shocks me any more Dawn.

And my problem, AMR is you.

ApocalypseThen · 20/05/2013 17:35

Can't agree that the idea that all views are of equal worth. Some are bigoted, racist, poorly informed and based on prejudice. I don't think it's right to give those views respect and deny the freedom of others out if deference to them. Where would that end?

Wossname · 20/05/2013 17:40

I read these threads just so I can identify the incredibly stupid and small minded. Only one or two so far, but thanks guys!

Binkybix · 20/05/2013 17:40

It's really annoying me during the debate that people keep talking about profoundly held religious beliefs, as though these beliefs should have more weight than others just because they're based on religion.

Binkybix · 20/05/2013 17:42

Also, can I just be crystal clear that was being sarcastic when I said ARM had convinced me!

jacks365 · 20/05/2013 17:45

Everyone is entitled to their view and everyone is entitled to be treated with respect but no policy should never be based on peoples views.

BlingLoving · 20/05/2013 17:52

Whoever posted the link to the article about why CP and marriage is different, thank you! I now have much clearer and more articulate reasons for completely agreeing with the OP. Emotionally, I have been shocked at the lack of support for gay marriage. Now I feel justified intellectually too.

What scares me is how many people think it's just okay to continue discriminating. Even the non religious ones think its okay to discriminate because supposedly there's a religious element to marriage. I am married. I got married in a church. I'm not religious. And clearly the difference between CP and marriage is more than just religion. But putting all that aside, why is religious discrimination okay in this instance? I think we'd all agree that female circumcision - supposedly an element of religious/cultural tradition - is not acceptable? What about forced marriage - surely we all agree that just because a religion supposedly supports it doesn't mean it's acceptable? So why is gay marriage suddenly one that we are all suposed to be respectful of? Especially when the people affected may not even necessarily be a member of this relgion!?

EduCated · 20/05/2013 17:54

I believe in equality. If I ever get married, it will be tainted by knowing it is a discriminatory practice. I believe marriage is a precious contract - one between two people in love. Everyday I try to live my life according to my beliefs in equality and fairness. I am horrified to live in a society where this isn't an automatic right.

Why are my beliefs not as important as ones claimed to be of a religious nature?

ApocalypseThen · 20/05/2013 17:56

Religious people are used to their beliefs trumping every other consideration and are struggling to adjust to how irrelevant they really are.

SuffolkNWhat · 20/05/2013 18:02

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

grimbletart · 20/05/2013 18:02

The sooner this is law goes through the better. DH and I will be celebrating our golden wedding in a couple of years and I can assure those who think gay marriage is undermining the meaning of marriage that it certainly doesn't make my marriage feel less meaningful or changed in any way. In fact I feel quite insulted that there are people who insinuate that it might.

As an aside it is interesting though to note that if the law goes through it will actually mean inequality for heterosexuals as gays will now the right to marriage and civil partnerships whereas heterosexuals will have only the right to marriage. So, if equality for all is the aim, the next step has to be civil partnerships for heterosexuals. Not all heterosexuals want to be married, but would quite like the recognition and legal protection afforded by civil partnerships.

Lazyjaney · 20/05/2013 18:06

"Everyone is entitled to their view and everyone is entitled to be treated with respect but no policy should never be based on peoples views"

Unless they are the right views?

I'm in favour of Gay marriage but I'm also in favour of it's opponents being able to put it to a vote, as I think showing that the majority are for it will stop the carping.

And if the majority is against it, then I must accept that too. It's democracy, innit?

Chipstick10 · 20/05/2013 18:09

No church will be forced to conduct gay marriage, I can't understand what the problem is. It's just giving equal rights if gay couples feel they want to marry and I know there are many who do not want to, but no one is being forced to do anything so why the big kurfuffle.?

Binkybix · 20/05/2013 18:09

It's going for a vote in parliament, as is the norm. It is not the norm, or legal requirement, for legislation to go for a referendum, even if it was not in a manifesto. Why should there be a referendum on this topic, and not many others that occur during a parliament that were not in a manifesto?

ApocalypseThen · 20/05/2013 18:10

And if the majority is against it, then I must accept that too. It's democracy, innit?

We, no. That the majority doesn't like it is not a good reason to deny people their civil rights.

Chipstick10 · 20/05/2013 18:16

I was under the impression that the majority of the public are in favour.

LastTangoInDevonshire · 20/05/2013 18:19

Once this goes through (and go through it will), will I be given the equal opportunity to have a Civil Partnership at some point?

Wouldn't it be easier to have all marriages as CPs with a blessing in the eyes of God for those that want?

jacks365 · 20/05/2013 18:34

It should go through irrespective of the majority view because equality isn't about views but what is right.

Maryz · 20/05/2013 18:37

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

CrapsWithBears · 20/05/2013 18:40

And if the majority is against it, then I must accept that too. It's democracy, innit?

If the majority view was that interracial marriage should be criminalized or divorce criminalized or child abuse legalized, would you support them? It's democracy, innit.

EstelleGetty · 20/05/2013 18:41

I like to think of myself as being open to respecting all sides of an argument, but that goes out the window when it comes to equal marriage. Being against it is ludicrous. There are

EstelleGetty · 20/05/2013 18:50

Sorry, posted too soon. There are plenty straight people who give the 'sanctity' of marriage a bad name with no help from the gay community. The debate makes me think of this story:

Basically, it's the story of an American couple who became figureheads for the civil rights movement after they were arrested for their mixed (he was white, she was black) marriage in Virginia. Reading about it now, it sounds ludicrous that laws like that ever existed. I hope that, in the not too distant future, we will look back on the prohibition of gay marriage with the same disbelief. This is everybody's world, you live in it, so deal with it.

caroldecker · 20/05/2013 19:10

I personally fully support gay marriage - the only argument against it that has made even a modicum of sense to me was as follows.

If we allow marriage to consenting adults who may follow sexual practices different to hetro-sexual sex, then why ban incestuous marriage or multiple partners in a marriage?

It didn't convince me but I found the logic hard to argue with.

Dawndonna · 20/05/2013 19:14

Gay sex is not going to produce children with for example, haemophilia, as incest can.
Multiple partners, don't know the answer to that one.

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