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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To think after being together 2 years you would have met their friends

45 replies

SaveWaterDrinkMalibu · 02/05/2013 22:08

Been with DP nearly 2 years and have met NONE of his friends yet he regularly sees them.

Aibu to think after nearly 2 years I'd have met his friends?

OP posts:
caroldecker · 02/05/2013 22:13

he's not that into you

Pendipidy · 02/05/2013 22:14

Why not? Have you asked? Don't they call round the house, you two round theirs?

Cherriesarelovely · 02/05/2013 22:14

When you ask him why what does he say?

Original poster
SaveWaterDrinkMalibu · 02/05/2013 22:16

I've asked and asked and asked.

Just get told oh it's lads only.

OP posts:
poodletip · 02/05/2013 22:16

That's very odd! What's he hiding from you or them?

Dahlen · 02/05/2013 22:16

Well unless you're going to drip feed that you live in different countries or something, that's just weird and not a good sign.

Gossipmonster · 02/05/2013 22:16

He doesn't see you as long term IMO :(

Dahlen · 02/05/2013 22:17

Hmm, sounds like a bit of a chauvinist to me. Lads/girls nights out are fine, but it's normal to arrange a mixed-sex get-together from time to time as well.

Cherriesarelovely · 02/05/2013 22:18

How about his family? Have you met them? Has he met your friends?

Gossipmonster · 02/05/2013 22:18

Or he has another women :(

Original poster
SaveWaterDrinkMalibu · 02/05/2013 22:18

Met family - he's met mine

He's met most of my friends

OP posts:
WafflyVersatile · 02/05/2013 22:20

Have you asked if none of his friends have girlfriends?

Original poster
SaveWaterDrinkMalibu · 02/05/2013 22:21

Have asked and get told yeh. 1 even got married last year and I wasn't allowed to go

OP posts:
WorraLiberty · 02/05/2013 22:21

Do you trust him?

I only ask because when I was a barmaid many years ago, one of the regulars never let his girlfriend meet his mates, because he was too afraid they'd let the cat out of the bag about the women he used to cop off with on the lad's nights out.

Have his friends met each other's girlfriends etc?

corlan · 02/05/2013 22:21

Have you met any of his family?

If you have not met anyone that knows him well, I would say there is a very good chance he is hiding something (he's married, he's not who he says he is, he's a traffic warden - could be anything!)

Unfortunately, I speak from bitter experience. My XP told me a whole pack of lies about why I couldn't meet his family or friends - I later found out he'd done it to hide a lot of things about himself - including his real name and even his nationality!!

I think you should run like the wind.

scaevola · 02/05/2013 22:23

Lads only? What do they do?

If it's geeky gaming, then it might be a mercy to be spared. But a bit odd never to see any of them for anything. (I'm assuming that as you've met family, you've not been duped into being an OW).

ImperialBlether · 02/05/2013 22:24

I agree that someone who hides his partner from his friends is usually worried about what she might learn from them.

Why did you let him meet your friends when you couldn't meet his? Surely it's a two way thing?

ImperialBlether · 02/05/2013 22:24

Just read about the wedding - OP, he's not that into you.

What's he like with you?

Original poster
SaveWaterDrinkMalibu · 02/05/2013 22:26

With me everything is ok now - just been through a huge rough patch

OP posts:
Cherriesarelovely · 02/05/2013 22:34

What happened with the wedding then? Did other people take their DPs? What was his explanation when you asked?

LessMissAbs · 02/05/2013 22:38

Hmmn I was seeing a guy on and off for TWO YEARS. Got fed up with him and dumped him and only then did he announce in a fit of pique that he had had a "proper girlfriend" for THREE YEARS. I had met all of his friends and family, they were totally unaware of her - she lived in a different town 150 miles away. Apparently.

Why would you put up with that OP?

ImperialBlether · 02/05/2013 22:40

Fuck him. He should be proud to be with you. Tell him to fuck off.

Original poster
SaveWaterDrinkMalibu · 02/05/2013 22:40

Re wedding - I asked and he said not sure ill ask my mate. Mate said yeh invite was for both (so clearly are aware of me). He then said I'd rather go alone as the others were (true I think as the pics that are on Facebook are of most of the friends without their partners)

OP posts:
CaptainSweatPants · 02/05/2013 22:43

How old are you both ?

Are you planning on settling down with him?

If you get married you'll meet his mates Grin

Original poster
SaveWaterDrinkMalibu · 02/05/2013 22:51

In my head - I see us together and having kids etc

OP posts:
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