to be annoyed at MIL pronouncing DD's name incorrectly

[myhousewillneverbetidy]

We don't see in laws that often, maybe 2/3 times a month and haven't always had the best relationship with them (in fact they stopped speaking to us for several months and we still don't really know why )

Anyway the last time we saw them MIL kept pronouncing dd name incorrectly. DDs name does have 2 ways of pronunciation but she is 2 so would expect grandparents to be able to remember by now!!

I didn't say anything as we have such a fragile relationship with them and they would see it as me picking fault with them. I quietly seethed through the whole visit though

AIBU?

Sorry, scratch that last post. the two pronunciations are completely different! I was half asleep.

I imagine that will be a common error as she grows up. I wouldn't know which one was more popular.

YANBU. They should be corrected and they should want to say her name correctly.

No, Evelyn Waugh was definitely Eve-linn, and I'm pretty sure that Evelyn Glennie is too.

I had an Auntie Ev-lynn spelled Evelynn. Two syllables.

FWIW I would say they same way as your MIL says it OP. My mum's cousin has this name and that is how she says it.

I know ladies with it both ways.
I guess that Eve / Evie is a popular name and if you'd wanted either as a nickname then you'd maybe pronounce it Eeeev - lin, so perhaps that's more common.

You're MIL will have known an Evelyn here and there and it has probably influenced the way she thinks it's said. And no matter how much you try and correct her, she'll probably think 'oh yes right' try and clock it, but then get it wrong again the next time.

It's just something your DD is going to have to live with, from lots of people.

I've known 2 Evelyn's in my life!

One pronounced eev-lyn

The other pronounced ev-lyn

Both 2 syllable names.

HOWEVER..
It's nice pronounced ev-ah-lyn as well... I like it... And can't believe your MIL continues to say it wrong! So rude.

...and for the record it should be pronounced "Ismay" :o

There are certain names I get confused about how to say

They are

Maya
Sophia
Evelyn

I also have problems with major/mayor

I know people with these names and even though I know there is a 'correct' way for these specific individuals, I go into panic mode and just avoid using their names altogether.

I think it is some sort of naming dyslexia.

I'm not being passive agressive, its just if a word/name is filed in a particular way in your brain it is hard to relearn it.

I think if it was my own granddaughter I'd sort it out though

Keep correcting them, SIL continually called DD by a shortened verison of her name, until DD shouted "MY NAME IS NOT XXXX! It's xxxx!!!!" She stopped after that

I guess it boils back to whether you think there's any malice in the mispronunciation!

My given name is a reasonable one from the 1970s - I'd say my pronunciation is correct (well, I would - its my name!!) but the other pronunciation I'd say isn't so much "wrong" as just a different emphasis on one syllable over the other. As a sweeping generalisation, I'd say my Scottish friends pronounce it the way I would (emphasising the second syllable) - but my English friends would emphasis the first.

In exactly the same way as I would with "Evelyn" ...... Evelyn Glennie is from my neck of the woods originally and I'd say local pronunciation would be "Ev - Lynn". Second-most common in that area would be "Ev-Ih-Lynn", then "Eve Lynn". I put 99.9% of that down to a combination of local accents / emphasis (and previous exposure to the name) over malice.

So how much fuss to make with ILs I guess depends on whether you think they're "wrong" as opposed to just being "different".

Interesting, sounds like there's some regional variation going on but you're certainly not wrong OP, or to my ears, unusual.

On radio etc. I've always heard 'Eve-e-lin Waugh and 'Ehv-a-lin Glennie'. No idea if the Eve / Ehv pr. is to do with gender, time, place, class, personal preference or none of the above.

Pity her name isn't Evelyn Waugh really, as then you could annoy them back with a 'mis'pronunciation of their surname, given the Wok / Woff / Waar variations.

Anyway, it is all about intent. Surely though, most people would have said 'oh, do you mean...' or, 'that's an unusual pronunciation, I'd have said...' some time before now, wouldn't they? (They do sound odd!).

evelyn is ev-lyn
esme is esmi or possibly esmay but never esmeee
faustine is fawsteen not fow-rhymes-with-cow-steen.
so sez me. so there.

Maybe Lottie is right and it's down to regional variation, then? Or could it be class variation, or something that's changed over the last century? I'm wondering if Evelyn is one of these names like Ralph / Rafe, where Ralph Vaughan-Williams pronounced it Rafe. Perhaps it's moving from 'Eeevelin' to 'Everlin'? As I'd put the OP's pronunciation down as 'wrong'.