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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To think sitting in front of a computer isn't looking after our 6mo?

29 replies

DuckWaddle · 28/04/2013 17:22

In the mornings I occasionally get the luxury of a half hour lie in when my dh takes our 6 mo dd. Only problem is he just goes on the computer and has her on his lap. I don't feel happy with her sitting in front of a screen for such a long time and would really like it if he played with her instead. I brought it up with my dh and he thinks I'm being unreasonable. AIBU?

OP posts:
HoHoHoNoYouDont · 28/04/2013 17:23

I know someone like this except it's usually football on the tv.

A cop out if you ask me.

Mumsyblouse · 28/04/2013 17:28

YABU- it's his parenting time, he parents as he sees fit (as long as not dangerous). No biggie, in my book.

kinkyfuckery · 28/04/2013 17:33

Does he not get her breakfast/milk, change her nappy, dress her etc?

Sirzy · 28/04/2013 17:45

As long as she if fed, clean and happy then whats the problem? its half an hour not the whole day!

Lora1982 · 28/04/2013 17:46

Feel your pain. Cant say anymore right now for fear of snapping and losing my cool.

usualsuspect · 28/04/2013 17:47

I can't see the problem.

wannabedomesticgoddess · 28/04/2013 17:49

Its good for babies and children to just be. No stimulation, just relaxing with their parent. It doesnt have to be all go go go.

Going by your standards I am a terrible parent. My 5.5 month old sits on my knee on the sofa while I MN or read or watch TV. She does the same with DP. If I need to do housework she sits in her bouncy chair and watches her sister playing or the tv or whatever I am doing. Shes quite a content baby.

So YABU.

comewithmeandtakethiscity · 28/04/2013 17:50

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

BrianButterfield · 28/04/2013 17:50

First thing in the morning, anything goes IMO. When it's my turn to get up with ds he potters on the floor while I MN on my tablet, when it's DH's they watch movies on the sofa, sometimes we all go back to bed and zone out while DS watched Thomas - there's no activity until everyone's properly awake and dressed! A 6mo doesn't take much playing with anyway.

recall · 28/04/2013 17:54

YABU?let them be

ballroomblitz · 28/04/2013 17:55

I think you're being a bit unreasonable. Wouldn't be the first time I've brought my 6 mo on my lap while I'm on the computer. Long as she's quiet and happy what's the problem? And you're getting a lie-in. Everyone's a winner. Kids don't need constant stimulation.

I wish I could sit for a half hour on the computer without my dd getting bored and wanting to smack and chew the keyboard within five minutes.

dizzy77 · 28/04/2013 17:56

Based on experience, its only a short amount if time before he won't be able to get away with this, LO will insist on interaction in one way or another. DH used to do this and found it became increasingly difficult when DS got mobile and then started on Thomas/cbeebies but at least I got dressed.

likeitorlumpit · 28/04/2013 18:06

what harm is it doing ?

Original poster
DuckWaddle · 28/04/2013 18:21

I'm quite happy that consensus is iambu as means happier lie ins! Don't think made it clear in original post though- dh doesn't get to see her all week so I kind of hope for more quality time but I suppose I have to let them be and relax!

OP posts:
YourMaNoBraBackOfMyCar · 28/04/2013 18:30

dh doesn't get to see her all week so I kind of hope for more quality time but I suppose I have to let them be and relax!

His business surely? I bet you wouldn't put up with being told how to spend your quality time with her would you?

crashdoll · 28/04/2013 18:40

YABU because she's only little and doesn't need constant stimulation. Also, she's sitting with him, so gets the physical sense of bonding.

Relax and enjoy your lie ins! Wink

pigsinmud · 28/04/2013 18:46

Sorry yabu - enjoy your lie in!

ChocsAwayInMyGob · 28/04/2013 18:55

She's six months old. What did you want him to do? teach her to read? as long he doesn't wake you up to feed or change her, I don't see the problem. Enjoy your lie in.

Cuddling a baby IS quality time with them.

greenformica · 28/04/2013 19:07

It depends. If this is his only daily one to one time with his DD hes really copping out of some quality father-baby time. He could actually make it special instead of looking at his emails and giving her no attention.

I do think it's perfectly fine to do other stuff if you have lots of baby parent time together - hoover/answer emails etc while looking after kids

Tee2072 · 28/04/2013 19:10

What would you like him to do with her? She's 6 months! Read her Proust?

Nehru · 28/04/2013 19:11

PLAY with her?

liek how?

Original poster
DuckWaddle · 28/04/2013 19:14

My issue isn't the computer, it's the fact I feel he only spends time with her on the computer so isn't focused on her. But judging by the responses I should let him be so I'm now feeling pretty guilty! I even thought about accidentally unplugging the Internet today so he would spend some time focused on her! I think I must be turning into a dictator!

OP posts:
Nehru · 28/04/2013 19:15

you are!
I remember the same though.
In a couple of months she will be crawling. then it goes up a gear

Cloverer · 28/04/2013 19:17

What do you really do with a 6 month old? Focused on them doing what?

So long as the baby is fed, warm and clean she is being looked after.

wannabedomesticgoddess · 28/04/2013 19:20

Maybe he doesnt know how to interact with her?

I act ike an eejit with DD2, pulling faces and making silly sounds. So I get loads of smiles and giggles.

DP talks to her and dances her about and gives her toys etc but then he wonders why she doesnt smile and laugh. When I point out to him what I do he tries it and she laughs. He feels like a pillock doing it though.

Maybe he doesnt really know what to do.