Was I unreasonable not to tip hairdresser but ask him back and stop straightening me?

[SodaStreamy]

I had a mobile hairdresser to my house.

I have thick wavy hair and asked for it to be thinned out (as well as tidied up) so my waves were more defined.

Him 'your parting seems to be on the right hand side'
Me 'no it falls in the middle, I dont want one of those long side fringes, they don't suit me'

Ended up with a stupid side fringe blow dried straight...arrragh....why does every hairdresser in the world want to straighten my hair.

It's wavy, I like it wavy, I don't suit straight hair. I didn't tip but didn't tell him why and I feel a bit mean now as I will probably use him again because it doesn't look at all bad when rewashed and styled to my preference.

Was it mean not to tip? Will it put him off me trying to book him again?

My hairdresser is great, but she charges appropriately and it is her job, she wouldn't be able to make a living if she wasn't any good as I and other customers wouldn't keep returning for her great service. She owns the salon, drives a huge posh car, can afford a £600 LV bag just for the beach, numerous holidays, a lovely house, designer clothes etc, so I figure the tip I would leave is better served in my purse where it will make a bigger difference to my wallet than hers.

I do tip waitresses, and if a junior washes my hair then I will tip them.

You (and I expect most of us) need to be more assertive.

How did you end up with it straightened in the first place? He can't have done it by accident.

"When you dry my hair, please do not use straighteners"

"No thank you, I don't want my hair straight"

"I want to see what my hair looks like when it dries as I dry it, because that's how I can tell if I like the cut or not"

OMG as a hairdresser I am shocked and disappointed that so many of you have had such bad experiences with your hairdresser!! To answer some queries:

1. Hairdressers are mostly self employed - that means no paid holidays, no paid bank holidays, additional accountancy costs. A tip is appreciated but not expected. If they have gone to extra lengths to do something you couldn't recreate at home then a token gesture is nice. If you are in and out with a shampoo and wet cut in half an hour, or if they rush you out so they can see to their next client (assuming you arrived on time) then no, a tip is not necessary, they have earned a wage. But please don't assume that even a mobile hairdresser keeps all the money you pay them. They still have costs of products and training and travel to cover, as well as sick pay, insurance, and holiday pay, if you prefer not to tip on a visit by visit basis, then a Christmas gift of a box of chocolates or a small monetary gesture is appreciated. Just so you have an idea, a one week training course to refresh your skills is in the region of £750-1000. This invariably comes directly out of the hairdresser's pocket (as well as taking a week off work), and if you want them to learn the latest techniques, they have to pay the price. Scissors cost around £200, a professional hairdryer £80. Your £20 cut and blowdry doesn't go as far as you think.

1. The more positive statements you can give us, the better. You know your hair. We should be able to cope with your hair, but if you think your hair is difficult, unusual or awkward, then have that conversation with us. Tell us about your bad experiences. Tell us that you don't want your layers any shorter than __. Tell us you do or don't want it thinned it with a razor/thinning scissors/after straightening. Tell us you want smooth hair with curls at the bottom, or no diffuser, or no straighteners. It's your hair. Take ownership of it. If the hairdresser gets stroppy with you, because they don't want to listen to you, then leave.

1. BUT Be reasonable. Tell the hairdresser about your previous experiences but be willing to listen to them when they tell you they can't do ALL the things you've asked for in one haircut. Negotiate. "I want a change but I want to keep the length" doesn't leave a hairdresser room to manoeuvre. "I want all the dead ends off but no more than an inch off the bottom, and I want lots of choppy layers, but the shortest layer is just right now so nothing off there, and I want some shape around my face, but the last hairdresser cut it too short so not too much off, and it's too heavy but I don't want it thinned out, I like volume but my hair is really thin but it's very puffy and heavy" makes us lose enthusiasm, because we can't help you. We want you to love your hair, but with a spec like that, we can't do anything that will change your opinion on your own hair. Be open, but be firm about what you can and can't deal with, and work together with your hairdresser to create the perfect unique style for you, and listen to their advice on styling and maintenance. And believe that we're not always trying to sell you something - sometimes we just want you to come back but with more manageable hair that can only be achieved by looking after it. (I'm looking at you, girl with hair that hadn't been cut for over 2 years but wouldn't let me take more than 2 inches off. You want your hair long AND you've been able to grow it that long, great, but LOOK AFTER IT or don't bother with a one inch trim every two years.)

Hope this helps!!

Not a hairdresser but applauds Irichards

Can't believe so many think it is ok not to tip based on the cost of the haircut - I thought everyone knew that a haircut costs the price on the list plus 10% with 1 or 2 going to the apprentice who washes your hair. Like a previous poster, if I couldn't afford to tip, I wouldn't go. And if I could afford the tip but chose not to I would be ashamed of being so tight.

Also, the sheer bitterness of "they earn more than me" - almost as though a lowly hairdresser shouldn't be able to have maximum earning potential from their skills.

I like having nice hair rather than a bog brush head. I like taking an hour or two once every couple of months to be relaxed, read, have tea brought to me and have some gentle chat - the hairdresser is integral to the enjoyment of the experience and the end result. It's worth a tip as that's not just doing a job - it's providing a service with degrees of satisfaction.

I actually don't think OP was BU though - she wasn't happy with the finish. Some of you though...

Also, I think a lot of you are not going to the right hairdressers - tongs and straighteners? Really? My regular hairdresser is having some time out so I have been "doing the rounds" and I can honestly say whether my hair has been blown straight or curly, it has been done with a brush and hairdryer. But then I suppose if you're choosing purely on price...

Oh Zombie thread

I've got fine, lank hair and they always want to make mine wavy and bouncy, I think they see it as a challenge! I love it.

With regards to the tip, no you're not being unreasonable. My hairdresser is fairly expensive and I don't tip. I don't think your hairdresser would think at all badly of you for not tipping then asking him back.