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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to not understand why some women wear heels when they can't walk in them?

70 replies

DearJohnLoveSavannah · 17/04/2013 23:18

I can wear and walk in heels, although I have t draw the line at anything above 5" because I know I'd struggle.

Tonight I went out to dinner, was sat right next to the window - so obviously people watching. One woman walked by wearing average sized heels - doing the walk where your bum sticks out because you just can't walk in heels.

Aibu to not understand why some women do this?

OP posts:
ThisIsMummyPig · 18/04/2013 02:03

If you wear a skirt/dress for going out, you can't wear trainers/flat shoes - it just looks wrong. I am 5'10" and don't want to wear heels. Even so, over the years I have owned and worn lots of pairs.

Presumably if you are going to practise wearing them, you would have to do it in a mirror,and life really is too short.

If you think I look daft, then it's your problem.

DonDrapersAltrEgoBigglesDraper · 18/04/2013 02:58

There's a fair amount of pressure on women to wear heels - they're the shoes you wear for going out, special occasions, dressing up, making a good impression, at work, etc, etc.

Choosing not to wear heels is to actively opt out of that, and makes a statement in itself.

I'm 5"9' and am partial to heels, I can walk in them, but luckily don't have to wear very high ones, so am never exposed looking ridiculous.

As long as heels are the 'go to' shoes for dressing up, then there will be women struggling to wear them.

It's no wonder men would never countenance wearing them in a million years. Your average man's bare foot is smooth, unblemished and nice to look at; your average woman's not so - blister and corn-ridden, dolled up by regular pedicures. As I say, I wear them, but objectively speaking they are pretty ludicrous.

Morloth · 18/04/2013 03:07

I don't know why anyone wears heels.

Have a look at the design of feet/ankles/calves/knees and hips and then have a look at the design of a shoe with heels.

There are some clues that it isn't a very good idea.

But they are not my feet so I don't actually give that much of a damn, I just put it down as another incomprehensible thing people do.

People are crazy.

ifancyashandy · 18/04/2013 06:57

I bloody love heels. Wear them most days AND run multiple budgets of over 5million. Without plasters ruining my work clothes Startail and others. Way to go the Sisterhood btw Hmm

openerofjars · 18/04/2013 07:09

Of course you can wear flat shoes for going out. Hmm

I have about four pairs of car to bar heels, from pre DC days, which I can only really walk a few metres and sit down looking glamorous in and I really do wonder why the heck I bought them.

ithaka · 18/04/2013 07:12

I tend to look to Anna Wintour for this one (I know, sorry). Pretty little kitten heels are the way to go - dress appropriate and not agonising. Plus she looks like a powerful woman (which she is) not a pained fashion victim.

TheConstantLurker · 18/04/2013 07:25

I was at a family gathering last weekend and cousin and her daughter were both in vertiginous heels. Hobbled around all afternoon. Looked very painful.
Cousin laughed it off saying it was because they are both short. However the place was full of other equally short relations wearing low, attractive/interesting and apparently comfortable footwear.
It's another fashion. You can choose to wear them or not.

CSIJanner · 18/04/2013 07:37

Maybe they're learning?

DearJohn - yup! Feet definately change with pregnancy. The ligaments in your body loosen wit pregnancy, causing your feet to spread. As if it wasn't difficult finding shoes for my boats in the first place.

GoblinGranny · 18/04/2013 07:39

I don't wear heels, they are uncomfortable and pointless. Too much like crippling yourself for fashion.

'my feet have grown since having DCs

Is that really one of the side effects of having children?'

I got pregnant when I was 7 stone 4 and put on three stone. I think that, combined with softened ligaments caused the increase in foot size from 4 to 4 1/2. Then I did it again, a few years later, and my feet are now a 5.

TheConstantLurker · 18/04/2013 07:43

Personally I refuse to bow down to fashion and wear something which restricts my life.

SacreBlue · 18/04/2013 07:46

I have no problem with people wearing heels or not as the mood takes them. At 6' it used to make me a handy landmark over the heads in bars when we all met up. These days it makes me very striking at business events tho I am barefoot most of the rest of my life.

I think it's silly when people take it to extremes past their ability to actually function - which actually makes it their problem not mine - I can laugh if I want if someone is silly enough to chose shoes they can't walk in - gracefully or not.

And of course you don't have to practice in a mirror since the practice is about being able to walk - preferably gracefully but at least walk. There are plenty of men, women and children who wear new shoes about the house to wear them in, or practice tying a tie, or doing their shoelaces, with or without a mirror and regardless of how long or short they are or life is Smile

starsandunicorns · 18/04/2013 07:47

I have wide feet and dont like the feelof heels on my heel i have a few that are ok but wouldnt wear them for work as i pefer comfort. If i do wear them they are wedges rather than pionty ones as i feel safer in them

halfacup · 18/04/2013 08:23

Perhaps they are like me! I have different sized feet and it is virtually impossible to find heels that fit, look nice and I can walk in. Occasionally I want to wear a dress on a night out with a nice pair of shoes. I wore a pair of kitten heels at a ball last week I could not walk in them very well because the fit was not brilliant but for once I did not wear sensible flats and it made my day. Now I am thinking everyone was judging my dodgy heel walking skills!

Sunnymeg · 18/04/2013 08:24

I was born with a back problem and have always worn flats or a 1 inch heel at most. It is very difficult to get nice/pretty/dressy/smart flat shoes. Most are designed for older ladies. I always envied friends who 'heeled up' for an evening out. Now they are older most of them now have foot or knee problems and several have to wear orthotic supports, so we are now all in the same boat.

What worries me is the mums in heels with small children who totter down the road to school. They would never be able to run after them if they needed to!!

MrsDeVere · 18/04/2013 08:29

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

imour · 18/04/2013 08:30

nothing sexy about walking like ive shit myself , i would feel as if i looked like a man in drag trying to balance on heels.

Weegiemum · 18/04/2013 08:34

I can no longer walk in heels at all, I've got a neuro condition that affects my balance badly, so heels are out. I don't miss them much, apart from my knee high killer boots which have a 3" heel and were so comfy! I've got rid of most of mine now (ill never wear them again) but I still have those boots in the wardrobe, I can't let them go :( , though I'd give them to a good home if anyone needs size 10 (yes, 10!) killer boots!

It trainers, loafers and a pair of nice flat boots all the way these days.

TheConstantLurker · 18/04/2013 08:38

Another example of designers not providing what many seem to want-in this case, a pretty, low and comfortable shoe.

Trillz · 18/04/2013 08:38

Because they have been convinced that heels are socially expected for some occasions and outfits.

Trillz · 18/04/2013 08:39

Choosing not to wear heels is to actively opt out of that, and makes a statement in itself.

I agree with DonDraper

TiredyCustards · 18/04/2013 08:43

I can understand it on a night out, but when I see women wobbling around the town centre on a Saturday afternoon my mind does boggle Hmm

Jayne266 · 18/04/2013 08:54

Guilty

NeoMaxiZoomDweebie · 18/04/2013 08:58

I know exactly what you mean OP....I saw a young woman the other day in 5 inch heels and she was doing that weird walk...looked awful. I don't wear heels as I look terrible staggering along!

SacreBlue · 18/04/2013 09:09

I think maybe we are at odds with what we consider high heels - to me a kitten heel is a pretty delicate heel and I have rarely seen folks struggle - the platform type 5" high shoes I think are what I see most people struggle with.

Something like 3" is my fave and yes could still run after toddler all those years ago ironically after I broke my leg ok ok raucous dancing in lovely heels I regained all of the movement in my ankle and an unfortunate non heel wearing friend didn't - not saying it was the determination to get back into heels that did it - but they haven't destroyed my health permanently/yet

ifancyashandy · 18/04/2013 09:12

Nine West, Dune, Office, Aldo. All do a 3.5 to 4 inch heel with no platform. Agreed that not all women who want to wear heels want the stripper look.

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