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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To be hesitant in posting a video of my daughter dancing wearing only knikcers on FB?

80 replies

YoniShapedLoveBox · 15/04/2013 03:05

I made this really cool video today when my nearly 6 year old was pretending to be a rock singer using a kid's broom as microphone. I'm not usually PFB but the video is good. Problem is, she is wearing only her knickers and I'm not sure if it is inappropriate to share with my friends and family on FB (majority of them are abroad). I have high security settings and only real/close people added...what do you think?

OP posts:
Branleuse · 15/04/2013 09:30

its a kid in their pants dancing. Its not child porn.

If its funny, id probably post it

Original poster
YoniShapedLoveBox · 15/04/2013 09:30

Why people get so nasty? First of all, it was totally spontaneous and I didn't make a point for her to be in her knickers, no, I don't think that a video of a 6 years old in her knickers is cute nor funny, her mannerisms as a rock singer are funny and I'm a rock chick myself so I liked it. I will try and do again with her wearing clothes, hopefully will look natural and effortless like the original one. Thanks.

OP posts:
mrsjay · 15/04/2013 09:35

I didn't say it was child porn I said she was too old to be in a video on the internet in her pants toddlers it is cute but 6 yr olds not so much

catgirl1976 · 15/04/2013 09:37

Just post it :)

IvanaCake · 15/04/2013 09:43

Have you asked dd if she wants you to? My 5 year old has recently decided that people outside of mummy and daddy aren't allowed to see her pants (its rude, apparently). She would be horrified if I showed a video of her in her pants to everyone on my fb friends list.

Original poster
YoniShapedLoveBox · 15/04/2013 09:50

She doesn't care if she is in pants and she doesn't see any difference. For it is just HER regardless what she has on.

OP posts:
fromparistoberlin · 15/04/2013 10:02

no, dont do it

better safe than sorry

fromparistoberlin · 15/04/2013 10:04

why not do a dropbox instead? FB wellll dodgy IMO as you basically give them ownsership x

Molehillmountain · 15/04/2013 10:05

Op, I don't think anyone's being nasty-blunt and honest, yes, but not actually nasty.

Original poster
YoniShapedLoveBox · 15/04/2013 10:17

Well, I think lunar1 response was OTT ans it is an example how things start to get out of hand in AIBU. Anyway, I had no idea the stuff belongs to FB once it is there, no I didn't read the T&C. Also my acc is fairly new and this is probably why I'm looking into posting cool stuff for my real friends/family there. Never mind, I won't post that one and will try and do another one as I like it so much. Thanks for the reassurance and it is a shame we live in such a world where 6 years old in pants is a issue but the only thing we can do is to protect.

OP posts:
TheSecondComing · 15/04/2013 10:20

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

DuelingFanjo · 15/04/2013 10:28

why not put it on and limit the audience to those you want to see it?

Original poster
YoniShapedLoveBox · 15/04/2013 10:32

Fair point thesecondtime I was wonder the same. But she is the ONLY child in both side of the family, no sibilings or cousins, so people likes to see what she is doing. Also as I said before I have few REAL friends not all of my mates there. Nevermind. Stupid question on AIBU. Because I knew I was BU.

OP posts:
Original poster
YoniShapedLoveBox · 15/04/2013 10:40

always wonder the same that is what I meant in my last post

OP posts:
DaveMccave · 15/04/2013 11:17

I think it's fine. Completely innocent and I hate that people over think such innocence and make it sinister and a risk etc.

honeytea · 15/04/2013 11:23

I don't understand the issues around facebook owning the rights to the image/video. Do those of you who are worried about this really think Facebook would want their home video?

Sallyingforth · 15/04/2013 11:29

Use email, or if necessary Dropbox.
You cannot know how FB will develop in the future and who may get access to it - legally or illegally. Your daughter may feel very strongly about it when she's older.
On a separate issue, it's fun to play 'pop singer', but I hope you are teaching her that there are other, better things to aspire to.

FreudiansSlipper · 15/04/2013 11:29

i pointed it out

you own your photos/videos but fb has the right to use them if they want to

personally I prefer not to give a global organisation that right it is highly unlikely they would want to use one of my pictures

not many people seem to be aware that anything posted on fb is given over to them

FryOneFatManic · 15/04/2013 11:31

Okay, as FB gets the onwership of pics/vids posted, the problem might be if it goes viral then FB get the right to keep that vid out there. And also, as prospective future employers are now known to scour social media sites for information on potential employees, even something like this could come back and haunt the OP's DD.

And given the way FB keep changing their privacy rules, there's no guarantee that using the highest current privacy settings, will prevent the vid being seen by those who shouldn't at a later date if seetings get changes, yet again.

My privacy settings are tight, but even then I post very little on FB, and have warned my DCs about being careful that they are happy about what they post.

FryOneFatManic · 15/04/2013 11:33

okaaaay, "rights" not ownership, and "settings", not seetings. Doh!

Floggingmolly · 15/04/2013 11:34

Facebook is not private, it doesn't matter what your settings are; there will always be ways for things to be passed on to people you never intended to share with.
Plus, this probably sounds bitchy, but why assume other people will think a video of your child dancing in her knickers is as enchanting as you do?

ChickensHaveNoEyebrows · 15/04/2013 11:36

No, I wouldn't. Nowt to do with paranoia, and everything to do with the child's right to privacy.

FrauMoose · 15/04/2013 11:38

And when she's a teenager and some bloke wants to look at her half (or completely) naked on a webcam, or for an image of her without her top on via a mobile phone?

Original poster
YoniShapedLoveBox · 15/04/2013 12:30

Jesus, I already said more than 2 times I won't do it. I assumed when you delete your acc all gets deleted too. Also it is not a pop song it is a ROCK and ROLL one. Now that doesn't make any difference but for whoever pointed it above, so WHAT? She can be whatever she wants, pop/reggae/rock singer, teacher, doctor, lawyer, actress, chilminder, accountant, shop retailer, WHATEVER. Can't really believe people are picking on it too. Unbelievable.

OP posts:
mrsjay · 15/04/2013 12:32

yoni ask for mumsnet to delete your thread you are going to be replying all day now Smile

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