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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

AIBU to expect next door neighbours to give me my cat back?!?!?!

329 replies

tillytrotter11 · 14/04/2013 17:50

I am absolutely fuming and doing my nut! This is the first nice day of the year and I've just noticed my 11 year old cat, which went missing 11 months ago, in my next door neighbour's garden. The next door neighbour was sitting outside with her patio doors open and my cat was sitting next to her. Me and my daughters were in shock as we have searched for her and asked around and had even put posters up but had little luck and therefore we assumed that she had died. We kept calling the cat and she instantly recognised us but the woman just sat their ignoring us. We finally got the woman's attention and when we said "excuse me that's our cat" and asked for her back, she blatantly refused as she said she had "taken her to the vet and had her micro chipped". She then brought her husband out, who spoke to us like we were a bunch of idiots. He told us "she was an indoor cat" after we had showed them a load of photographs of her and then they stormed back inside.

It's very obvious that the cat had been shut all this time and the reason we have spotted her now is because it's a very nice day and they have let her roam in the garden.

Where do we stand and AIBU to expect them to return our much loved cat back to us? Thanks for any advice!!

OP posts:

HotCrossPun · 14/04/2013 19:32

I actually can't believe the nerve of your neighbours.

Catnappers - I've heard it all now!

Original poster

tillytrotter11 · 14/04/2013 19:33

Thank you! We are still bloody fuming! Can't believe we've been missing our supposedly "dead" cat for almost a year when she's been shut in next door all this time!! On advice from the police we've been told to keep our distance but fingers crossed we get her back!!

OP posts:

Original poster

tillytrotter11 · 14/04/2013 19:36

That's just the point! She couldn't "wander off" because she was shut in!!!

OP posts:

echt · 14/04/2013 19:40

The neighbours' microchip will not prove ownership as the date of chipping will show when it was done, i.e during the time the cat went missing.The vet's records will also show the age of the cat, unlikely that an 11 year-old cat could passed off as much younger.

I would imagine that your photos would clinch it.

Sparklingbrook · 14/04/2013 19:41

tilly could your vets help at all? Could they vouch for you being the rightful owner?

FannyFifer · 14/04/2013 19:48

Have seen a few cat napping stories on here before, madness, hope you get your cat back.

Bakingtins · 14/04/2013 19:56

The date of microchipping is stored on the Petlog database from the time of registration, so they won't be able to claim they had her for years.
This happens all the time usually accidentally, because people believe every sleek well fed kitty who comes into their garden is a 'stray'. I work at a vet practice and we regularly reunite microchipped 'stray' cats brought to us with their rightful owners, normally from a few doors away. One of my cats is a "six dinner Sid" and has a whole round of little old ladies he goes to visit, though I think I've persuaded them to stop feeding him now and just dispense cuddles. The other was the subject of a phone call to the practice very worried that the 'stray' he'd been feeding would go hungry when he moved away. That's a very fat well fed stray wearing a collar with tallies with owners phone no, vets phone no, saying he is chipped and 'prescription diet please don't feed me' There is no accounting for the gullibility of some people to the big brown eyes routine.
Your neighbours sound a piece of work though - to imprison a cat whilst being fully aware that a worried owner is looking for it takes some nerve. Hope the police put the frighteners on them.

mmmuffins · 14/04/2013 20:07

Cats are certainly property, yet you always get a few posters on these threads claiming they are not and you have no recourse (stop spreading misinformation if you don't know what you are talking about!)

Cats and the Law

I hope you get your cat back OP. I find it amazing that despite shelters being bursting, they stole your cat. I'm sure they convinced themselves that you don't take care of it as well as they do, so they are justified in their actions...

middleagedspread · 14/04/2013 20:13

I am horrified for you.
How could they live with themselves when they knew the cat belonged to someone else? They knew you were searching for your much loved pet.
I would be tempted to name & shame them to the local press.

Sparklingbrook · 14/04/2013 20:15

Good one for the Daily Mail.

middleagedspread · 14/04/2013 20:17

Hah yes, cue photogenic 11 year old cuddling cat with aggressive neighbour (preferably wearing housecoat & large scowl) in the background. Trying to think of headline..

MummyNoName · 14/04/2013 20:21

Mmmuffins-no one has said that cats aren't property.

The problem is that firstly the police (certainly in my case) wouldn't get involved.
It was regarded as a civil matter which is expensive to get to court etc.

Even if I won the case, there is nothing stopping said puss from going back to neighbours on his own free will.

Yes he might be mine in the eyes of the law, but not in the eyes of the puss. And that's where the problem lies.

Neighbours etc can refuse to feed, stroke, cuddle the cat-but there are no laws preventing them from doing so. So cats will, and do, as they choose.

echt · 14/04/2013 20:25

Someone on the first page did say that cats could not be legally owned.

echt · 14/04/2013 20:26

Sorry, I didn't mean having a cat was illegal.

mmmuffins · 14/04/2013 20:31

Someone up thread did say it (and in general I've seen it posted again and again on cat threads) so I thought the link might be helpful!

Sparklingbrook · 14/04/2013 20:33

echt a lot of people on Mn think having a cat is illegal-have you never seen a cat poo in the garden clutching pearls thread?

SauvignonBlanche · 14/04/2013 20:34

Two different people said it on the first page.

echt · 14/04/2013 20:35

Snurk. You're right there.:o

Theicingontop · 14/04/2013 20:35

I don't know what to advise, but my heart breaks for you.

We had the same happen to us, to our beloved 4 year old cat. We had to move from the area and were desperately trying to get him back, but didn't manage it in time, and we'll never get him back now. We called the police, knocked on their door hundreds of times, nothing. They denied they had him but we saw him every morning getting the sun on their windowsill. So heartbreaking.

catsmother · 14/04/2013 20:38

I was about to post what Echt did. I really hope a casual visit from the police will be enough to shame and/or frighten these people into doing the right thing and giving you your cat back.

Yes - it's true cats wander, but as you say, this one was locked in for almost a year. I very much doubt they thought she was a genuine stray if she was healthy and I also doubt that they'd not already seen her what with them being your next door neighbours and all that ! I bet they also saw the posters you put up - how could they not living so close to you ?! With that in mind, I find it absolutely disgusting that they'd let you stress, worry, and eventually mourn the loss of your cat all this time - how horribly cruel. As a cat owner, I've thankfully never had a cat go missing for more than 3-4 days but I know many people who have and they all say the worst thing is the "not knowing" .... even if they have been killed they'd rather know as at least you wouldn't then be continually worrying about them being trapped, hurt and so on. Over the years, I've taken in two strays - one was an absolutely gorgeous kitten - probably about 20 weeks old, who was a darling and who got on with all my other cats and it was indeed very tempting to keep him - however, I did the right thing and put up notices all over the village until he was claimed about 2 weeks later. The 2nd stray - an unneutered female who was being attacked by every neighbourhood tom in my back garden - was never claimed so I had her for 13 years, but at least I tried to reunite her with an owner.

BTW, none of my cats have ever strayed and acquired new owners for themselves in almost 30 years! I think the proportion who do is relatively small and it'd also be very strange IMO if your cat "decided" to move next door after eleven years of living quite contentedly with you - unless there'd been a major change in your living environment which had upset her.

Really hope the police can sort this for you. I don't understand people who'd probably describe themselves as "cat lovers" who'd then put another owner through this distress.

GoSuckEggs · 14/04/2013 20:46

what utter shits!!! good luck!

MistressoftheYoniverse · 14/04/2013 21:13

Bluddy evil bastards!!..go get your cat back!

shewhowines · 14/04/2013 21:14

Good luck getting her back. i remember the upset when, as a child, my cat went missing. Fortunately we got her back a few weeks later, although the lady who found her quite a few streets away, wanted to keep her. She did the right thing though, as most people would.

Sparklingbrook · 14/04/2013 21:16

For some reason I was imagining an old couple tilly, but just realised you didn't say that. How old are they? Just curious. And have they been perfectly normal with you the last 11 months?

cinnamonsugar · 14/04/2013 21:19

God that's outrageous I would be fuming too. Good luck with the police on Tuesday.

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