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AIBU?

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Original poster

To really not understand why people do not join the organ donation register?

276 replies

3littlefrogs · 11/04/2013 22:18

I have been registered since I passed my driving test nearly 40 years ago. If I am dead I won't need my organs. They could save someone else's child, wife, husband, sister, brother.

OP posts:
LadyBeagleEyes · 12/04/2013 12:43

I agree Squoosh, of course they would, who wouldn't.

xigris · 12/04/2013 12:52

There was a great documentary on organ donation a couple of years ago

clucky80 · 12/04/2013 13:04

I just wanted to give the point of view from a recipient... I had a double organ transplant when I was 26. I (and my family) would never have imagined that I would need an organ transplant and when I was told that this was my only chance we were all very shocked. In a very short space of time my kidneys had failed, my heart had been affected and I was told that I would be totally blind within a year. Receiving the gift of life from my amazing donor (with permission granted from his mum) has literally saved my life - I feel truly blessed and incredibly lucky to be healthy, to have been able to marry my amazing husband and also to have my miracle little boy after I had been told that it would be very unlikely that I would manage to fall pregnant never mind carry a child. I am in regular contact with my donors mum (my donor was 19 when he passed away) and she has told me that she takes so much comfort from the fact that from such a tragedy, her son has given the gift of life to me (and 4 others) and has allowed my parents to see me grow into adult hood. When I told her that I had my son she was so happy and said that at the time of making the decision to donate her sons' organs she could never have imagined that new life could be created out of his gift. My son's middle name is my donors name and when DS gets older I will be so proud to tell him about the wonderful young man and his family who in the face of such heartbreak made the brave decision to donate his organs and save mummy's life and let me give birth to my precious boy.
If people are really against organ donation and I do believe in people's right to choose, then please consider donating blood. After my transplant I had some complications and had internal bleeding - without receiving 4 pints of blood that night again I wouldn't be here.

mrsminiverscharlady · 12/04/2013 13:19

Can we try and avoid using the word harvesting? I work in this area and just to say re the term harvesting - certainly where I am it is known as 'organ retrieval' as harvesting is seen to be a rather outdated and macabre term.

squoosh · 12/04/2013 13:20

'Harvesting' makes me think of someone being drugged in a bar and then waking up to find themselves in an ice bath and minus a kidney.

LadyBeagleEyes · 12/04/2013 13:24

Harvesting is a horrible word.
It should be donating or giving.

crashdoll · 12/04/2013 13:30

I find it very hypocritcal that people would receive yet be unwilling to give (unless for medical reasons that means they cannot give). I am registered and have told my family my wishes and they respect them. I don't care who my organs go to, they are given with no conditions attached. So, even the selfish person who won't give but will receive can have my organs with my blessing. I won't need them, I'll be dead.

LyingWitchInTheWardrobe2726 · 12/04/2013 13:34

Thank you, xigris, for your post, very informative.

I'm on the organ donation register and my husband knows my wishes so there will be no delay.

I absolutely agree with MrsDavidCaruso (wasn't he fab in 'Game of Death'?) that there should be no blanket law in place to take organs if people haven't opted out. People's organs may be donated as a gift, they are not to be taken, not EVER.

I'm quite interested in 'living donation' and have been looking into it. I don't think it's as commonplace in the UK as it is in the USA. I've been told I have a very nice liver and super kidneys... ... Grin

I wouldn't mind donating a surplus organ. :)

Mynewmoniker · 12/04/2013 14:08

Yes I'm on the register.

I love being of help so it's great to think I can still do it after my death. I won't need them so I'd be happy to freecycle them Smile

MiniTheMinx · 12/04/2013 14:14

I am very conflicted over this. I am not registered and neither are any other members of my family.

I would never accept an organ for myself.

The only way I would donate is if that were to save the life of a child. But I suspect I am far too old!

I am not religious but feel strongly that medical science over steps its useful remit in keeping too many people alive well into ancient decrepitude. If and only if advances in medical science are matched with advances in other areas such as economic/social production and standard of life, the way in which we live and the way in which we work to produce what we need, I can't see how a dwindling birth rate and an ageing population can sustain itself. Just as I can't see a good social/economic reason to give organs to adults over a certain age.

AnonYonimousBird · 12/04/2013 14:18

Lots of people join, but then it's their relatives that override the decision when the time comes.

Honour the wishes of your dead loved one! Let their body go to good use, if that is what they wanted!

andubelievedthat · 12/04/2013 14:20

prob. because due to a recent DAILY FAIL article, they sell them to rich ill peeps ,add to that they apparently will let you die to get your "bits" for aforementioned rich ill peeps, don"t matter the truth of article,it shits peeps up !thats is one of many reasons people do not sign up, and soon they will take them anyhow,cos its a business.and everything has a value .

Katiepoes · 12/04/2013 14:30

In Holland if you have registered your family cannot refuse.

I like the opt out option - unless you specify that you do NOT want to have your organs used you are assumed to consent. That way people that do not approve of life saving measures can opt out and hope they are never the parent or partner of someone on a waiting list.

BTW Minitheminx please use some sense - people that receive organs are rarely at the point of 'ancient decrepitude'. The fact that they need an organ at all suggests it's unlikely they'd get that far.

Binkybix · 12/04/2013 14:32

mrsdavid any opt in system that was being considered was not intended to allow any body tissue to be taken for whatever reason, it was about donation of organs to the living only (again I think), and in that case I don't think your scenario is realistic. Not sure that there would be a use for all that tissue you are envisioning being taken or orher reasons in any case?!

I too am against opt-out, though, I think. It makes me really cross that someone would accept and not give, and says a lot about them as a person, but I think it's just the way it has to be.

There was a thread on this a while bak that got pretty heated as I recall.

Binkybix · 12/04/2013 14:33

Sorry, first para should say 'opt-out'

AmberSocks · 12/04/2013 14:34

im not on the register and i wouldnt give my childrens or dhs organs away either.i wouldnt accept any for myself,or on my dhs behalf,im not sure about my children though.

MiniTheMinx · 12/04/2013 14:37

Katiepoes, no, I was just saying that medical science is a wonderful thing, so advanced we keep people alive to face ancient decrepitude. I know that old people are not given organs. I am just reflecting upon the fact that advances in medicine in general are keeping people alive too long into old age.

Wheresmycaffeinedrip · 12/04/2013 14:43

What's age got to do with it mini doesn't a 60/70 deserve to watch their grand kids grow up and be a part of their life?
If someone views that a person is at that moment a top priority then so be it. It's not our decision to make and I thank my lucky stars that I'm not the one that has to make the tough decision knowing that what means life for one person means a death for another.

To not donate for no other reason than u might not approve of who it goes to is beyond weird.

Meglet · 12/04/2013 14:44

I've often thought about what I would do if I was in the tragic situation to have to donate the kids organs, and I think (and hope) I would have the balls to go through with it. I'd hate myself if I wimped out and deprived another child / family of that chance.

Coconutty · 12/04/2013 14:48

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

squoosh · 12/04/2013 14:52

Jehovah Witnesses refuse blood transfusions so I'm pretty sure this would stand for organs too.

SauvignonBlanche · 12/04/2013 14:53

Thank you xigris for your very informative posts.
I think the first temps we should take is refusing to allow next of kin to override people's well thought out wish to be on the register.
The need to be on the register before receiving a transplant in future may also concentrate people's minds. Hmm

Good luck clucky80 my DH wouldn't be alive today either if it hadn't been for his donor's family.

squoosh · 12/04/2013 14:57

What's the point of there being a register if relatives can override your decision. I suppose most people would honour the wishes but I bet a significant number don't.

SauvignonBlanche · 12/04/2013 15:00

125 in the last year

MiniTheMinx · 12/04/2013 15:00

47% of UK benefit spending goes on state pensions
£4 million pounds a week is spent keeping elderly people in hospitals.

Unless a way can be found to care for an ageing population that doesn't significantly reduce the overall standard of life for children and families, I see no good reason why medical science should continue down the road of extending life, by that I mean not individuals but the ages to which we are now living. There was a time when diet, basic health care and good hygiene extended life, from around 35 years in the 1300s to 60/70 years. Quite why we need lots of people living into their 80/90s is beyond me.

How many working mothers have time to deliver meals on wheels and offer 30/40hrs of unpaid care to elderly relatives?

As regards approval, I remember lots of people discussing whether George Best should have received a liver. I didn't have an opinion on that and I still don't.