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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

My toddler can run faster than me. Aibu to not have expected this?

34 replies

reneaa2 · 02/04/2013 09:20

My 22 month old can now out run me and has no sense of danger.

I am struggling with tantrums about this on a daily basis and am upset that no friends have ever mentioned this!

Am I the only parent who has this issue?

(I am not a particularly slow runner in te first place, although I am getting faster now).

OP posts:
WilsonFrickett · 02/04/2013 10:08

The back packs are less 'rein' like and if you're moving to a city and you can't catch him, it's not optional I'm afraid, he'll just have to be bribed get used to them. You can start practicing 'stop' too - make it into a game that he can run or walk but he has to stop the minute you say stop (or 'whoa', we did it as a horsie game) in a big voice. Make it fun for now, but it will be useful when you are in traffic situations.

JamieandtheMagicTorch · 02/04/2013 10:08

My DS2 (the runner) became brilliant at holding onto the buggy when it was necessary after being with a childminder. It taught be that if he could do it for her, he could do it for me.

JamieandtheMagicTorch · 02/04/2013 10:10

Wilson

Yes, making a stop-go game is good. I used to chant "we're walking, we're walking' we're walking etc etc STOP". Worked well.

reneaa2 · 02/04/2013 10:22

Yes thanks for those ideas, going on holiday soon to city so will try them out then too. I already do the wrestle into buggy business when he is being dangerous and not tantruming. Fortunately I can still outsmart him into a corner or bribe him occaisonally as well to come back.

OP posts:
teacherwith2kids · 02/04/2013 10:34

reneaa2,

Try out those ideas NOW so he is ready for the city. Make absolutely consistent rules, and enforce them every time.

I had a runner (who became a scooterer - and on that he could go WAY faster than me when I was pushing the pushchair with DD in it).

He hated reins, but if he ever failed to stop when asked, or to hold onto hand or pushcair when told to, they went on. We played many games of start / stop / go / run / walk - in our garden, then in our tiny rural lane, before trying it out anywhere where not stopping could be dangerous. We rehearsed the rules - stop at the end of the pavement, stop when an adult tells you to, hold onto an adult or pushchair if on a road with no pavement - so often that they became second nature, but also combined them with [at least] daily opportunities to run free in areas where the rules weren't needed.

Not having rules now, then trying to create them suddenly in a new environment, is likely to work less well than creating, and sticking to, rules now that you will want to use when he is in a city environment.

TheNebulousBoojum · 02/04/2013 10:38

I found lampposts useful as markers, 'You can run to the next lamp post, run to the one near the fence' etc Agree with the training being clear and uncompromising and needing to start ASAP.
Embarrassment? Entertainment? Smile

DontmindifIdo · 02/04/2013 10:46

He's old enough to understand rules like if he doesn't want to wear the reins, he has to walk nicely and not run away, so practice now, put him in the reins. Take them off when he's walked nicely holding you hand with them on.

DS is 3, and I am 30 weeks pregnant, he's a lot faster than me, but I'm just having to be really mean with him until he learns.

teacherwith2kids · 02/04/2013 10:57

"Fortunately I can still outsmart him into a corner or bribe him occaisonally as well to come back. "

I'm a bit worried by this, tbh. You are the adult. For his safety, you have to make and enforce the rules - but you also have to create opportunities for him to run - every day, at least, preferably more - where rules are not needed.

If your discipline in this - and his safety - relies on the 'lucky event' that you can outsmart him or bribe him, then you are not sufficiently in charge to keep him safe.

A friend of mine, whose parenting I admired, once explained to me that she saw her role as setting absolute boundaries that kept her children safe, but allowing as much space within those boundaries as possible to give them freedom.

ElliesWellies · 02/04/2013 12:07

Can he really outrun you? Do you have a disability that prevents you from running properly, because otherwise it really should not be the case (unless you are heavily pregnant or something).

You have to get strict, I think. We live in London. DS is 2y4m - he is not allowed to walk in the street unless he holds hands, and if he refuses then he gets warned once, and then straight in the pushchair. I have a wrist link as a failsafe as am 40 weeks pregnant and if he twisted away he could be in the road before I could get him (though to be fair to him he is usually very good and the threat of the pushchair is enough).

In parks / open spaces, are you sure that you're not just giving him too much of a headstart, i.e. you're not sticking close enough to him? Especially near gates he could escape through.

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