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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to have such a strong reaction to this advert for cancer?

176 replies

FarleyD · 23/03/2013 13:53

I'm talking about the advert where people throw insults around, eg there's a little girl saying "you make me sick", someone else saying "cancer you twat", someone saying "we're going to get you" etc.

I don't watch much tv, and adverts barely register on my radar. I'm suprised at the strength of my reaction to this ad. I don't know what it is about it but it almost makes me feel queasy. Maybe it's the fact that the ad suggests the power is in our hands to "fight" this pernicious disease. It just doesn't sit right with me.

Does anyone else feel this way? Can anyone explain why I feel like this?! And aibu?

OP posts:
WhereYouLeftIt · 23/03/2013 18:04

I really didn't like this advert either. It just said all the wrong things to me, and of all things it made me think of John Wayne's personalising cancer as 'the Big C'. (Fuxsake, he couldn't even say the word!) The whole concept of cancer as an entity that can be talked to/dissed/threatened - it just jars.

I also dislike the fight/battle language. You don't fight a disease/condition, you treat it. I do think it leaves the implication that those who didn't 'beat' cancer didn't 'fight' hard enough hovering in the air, and I really, really don't like that. A little bit blame-the-victim methinks.

But I did gel with the 'falling' advert. I thought that got across the message of support needed very well. I found it quite moving.

Shelly32 · 23/03/2013 18:05

But it's certainly done its job and raised awareness/discussion..

twentythirteen · 23/03/2013 18:06

Oh not at all, it impacts on me strongly but in a supportive way. It makes me cry every time, and it rings bells about how I feel towards my miscarriages.

louisianablue2000 · 23/03/2013 18:09

I agree that the 'fighting cancer' language when talking about an individual suffering from the disease is unhelpful. But that's not what I got from this advert, it's about the fact that if we spend money on scientific research then fewer people die. It's not as effective as the CRC childhood leukaemia advert though which makes me cry (I'm a scientist who works in the pharmaceutical industry and that advert encapsulates the reasons why I do my job).

Macmillan provide support for people with cancer and so they are going to focus on what it feels like. They provide a wonderful service in helping people to prepare for death and live their life as fully as possible for the time they have left. Their adverts are always going to have a different focus to the research adverts.

Fairylea · 23/03/2013 18:13

Hate it.. I hate the whole idea of someone fighting cancer. It's not a fight you can control. You can't kick it harder to make itgo away.

I also on another note think it's quite rude for daytime viewing.. I don't want to hear "up yours" during the day even if it is aimed at cancer. It's unnecessary.

Shelly32 · 23/03/2013 18:13

louisianablue2000 I totally agree. I think one of the best research ads is where they say it's cancer's turn to be afraid and the cell grows smaller. I'm fed up of feeling scared. Cancer is the one thing that preys on my mind and it's something we have little control over. I'd like us to have some control.

expatinscotland · 23/03/2013 18:13

CRUK benefits everyone? Funny that, if you look at their stats and where most of their money goes. Hmm

It's done it's job to make sure I never donate a penny to them, tbh.

firesidechat · 23/03/2013 18:14

It is an enemy and it needs to be beaten. The recent research that Metformin can stave it off and prevent it from beinf terminal is a massive breakthrough and more money needs to go into this type of research. I don't think the ad suggests that those who die from it are weak. In fact some of the people in it say they've lost people to cancer. We do need to beat it and together is the best way. The ad tries to unite people by evoking the anger, rage and gried felt by those suffering/who know people suffering.

Shelly32 - I do understand that the advert isn't just about people "fighting" cancer, but not sure if it a helpful view of cancer at all It is a hard hitting advert, but can't help feeling that there are more subtle ways of promoting charity giving. Can't stand the emortional blackmail of some adverts either. Thought the falling down one was pretty much spot on.

Anger and rage are a bit pointless where cancer is concerned - a whole lot of shellshock, sadness and just getting through the next treatment is more like it. We do still have a lot of fun and happiness though, so not as depressing as it sounds.

WhereYouLeftIt · 23/03/2013 18:16

"I'm fed up of feeling scared."
WHy would you be scared? Confused

Shelly32 · 23/03/2013 18:16

Expat Where does the money go? How else can you help research if not through CRUK? It's like saying you won't donate to any charity as a large percentage goes to admin staff and running costs.

expatinscotland · 23/03/2013 18:16

'I think one of the best research ads is where they say it's cancer's turn to be afraid and the cell grows smaller. I'm fed up of feeling scared.'

It is yourself. It is not an entity or an extra-terrestrial. If you are that fed up of feeling scared, of a disease which, other than lifestyle changes which can hopefully discrease the chances of developing some forms of cancer, you can't prevent, you need to get some professional help.

'It's cancer's turn to be afraid'. What a completely bizarre thing to say! It doesn't have a brain.

tazzle22 · 23/03/2013 18:18

Eaxh person certainly seems to perceive th emessage differently... I see it is asking people to run to raise money to help fund research to help figh a disease that affects so many of us. I have seen other diseases / conditions referred to in this way .... as in "beating it" too.

I hear a lot of individuals say about "fighting" cancer and "losing" or "winning" on an individual basis but dont hear that from the advert.

Totally agree thats its not really helpful ever to personalise it in that way.... its does not matter how "brave" someone is or how hard they "fight"...... in the long run its not what makes the difference between life and death. No one that dies of cancer "fails".

I just hope that medical research speeds up progress in finding more ways to treat this disease ............ and if this advert helps by getting more people to donate / run then no matter if individuals like it or not it will have done its job, just like the other one which may have appealed or turned off different people ?

MurderOfGoths · 23/03/2013 18:19

"But it's certainly done its job and raised awareness"

I'd say the majority of us on this thread are quite aware enough.

Shelly32 · 23/03/2013 18:19

Where youleftit Ever since my Gran died of cancer, and ever since I had my girls, I've had a bit of an obsession. Every ache and pain and I'm terrified I've got something serious and terrified I won't see my girls grow up. I know I'm wasting my life and need to get over it but the worry won't go. It's something I know I need to stop but.. I just want a cure for everyone, as we all do.

Nancy66 · 23/03/2013 18:21

I don't like the ads either - but there's a lot about cancer awareness that makes me uneasy.

i can't stand the Moonwalk for example. Hordes of women walking the streets in their bras....

expatinscotland · 23/03/2013 18:21

'Where does the money go? How else can you help research if not through CRUK? It's like saying you won't donate to any charity as a large percentage goes to admin staff and running costs.'

You honestly think CRUK is the only cancer research charity out there? Hmm

And that's not at all like saying don't donate to any charity as a large percentage goes to admin staff and running costs. Do you assume all people are so ignorant?

They donate far too little to childhood cancers (such as neuroblastoma, Ewing's sarcoma and rhabdomyosarcoma) and brain tumour research for me to donate to them, on top of these ads.

They claim it's because these cancers are 'rare'. It's only rare when it doesn't happen to you.

Shelly32 · 23/03/2013 18:24

Expat I get what you are saying and it's not fair. I don't have much experience of childhood cancers and just assumed they spread the wealth equally. Clearly not!

firesidechat · 23/03/2013 18:26

I think that's the thing about cancer; it's not nice, but it's just one of the many things that can kill us.

Someone asked my husband if he would fight cancer to the end and I think he meant would he continue having treatments to prolong life. This is slightly jumping ahead of things because we are no where near that sort of scenario. Husband said that we are all going to die of something, which is of course perfectly true.

Swearing at a disease is a bit of a rubbish concept for us.

expatinscotland · 23/03/2013 18:26

They are entitled to do what they wish with monies they raise. I prefer to give to other charities revolving around blood cancer, as my child died from pneumonia as a complication of treatment/failed stem cell transplant, for acute myeloid leukaemia. Her consultant, one of the best in the world in that area of paediatrics, loses about 40% of all children she treats with AML to disease and another 10% to its treatment.

WhereYouLeftIt · 23/03/2013 18:28

Shelly, there isn't going to be a cure for everyone. Not in our lifetime. Not ever. But there can be an end to your terror. Maybe you should talk to your GP about it, and see if you can be referred for counselling? Because that really sounds an unpleasant way to live, and it can't be good for you or your girls.
((un-mumsnetty hug))

expatinscotland · 23/03/2013 18:28

'Husband said that we are all going to die of something, which is of course perfectly true.'

True. And sometimes there are no more treatment options at present, or they confer such poor quality of life-prolonging that many opt not to take them. That doesn't make them not 'fighters' or 'brave', it makes them people who made a decision they found best for them and their family together with their doctors.

EchoBitch · 23/03/2013 18:28

I don't like that ad either.

DP has cancer and my Mum died of it last year.

You can't always survive any disease.

I hate all that 'fighting' cancer stuff.

You take the tablets/hormones and do the chemo/radio therapy and hope for the bloody best.

expatinscotland · 23/03/2013 18:30

There certainly won't be, Where, this is true. Particularly because we have a long way to go with understanding our genome better. Also, because cancer is oneself, so much more research needs to be done on a very genetic level, and of course, so many permutations of each kind of cancer genetically and in its response(s) to treatment.

EchoBitch · 23/03/2013 18:31

And be truly grateful that the treatment is still free of charge.

Thank Godness for the NHS.

Shelly32 · 23/03/2013 18:31

They can , obviously do what they want with the money but I'm surprised they don't give more to childhood diseases! My best friend died of leukaemia but I was only 9 so am not sure of exactly what type. Those mortality percentages are high.