to expect pil to treat their granddaughters equally

[PrincessScrumpy]

Dd1 is 5 and dtds are 18 months old. Now I know they're too young to notice but dd1 might. Mil messaged dh to say she was sending money for us to buy eggs For dc and a book for dd1 that she knows she wants and a book for dtds. I thought maybe the dtds book cost more than dd1s but it arrived with the invoice and it was a pound cheaper. aibu to be annoyed dtds have to share their book?

DH spoke to mil and mentioned in a jokey voice that we have 3dc and asked if she'd forgotten and since that she is now sending another book but seemed to imply we were demanding gifts for dc which isn't the case. We weren't expecting Easter gifts at all but if she wants to then I feel it should be shared between all 3, one each or at least if dtds have to share the cost should be roughly double dd1s gift.
I know it's sorted now but Aibu to think she shouldn't have created three situation to begin with?

Ishould never write an aibu when busy. Too many bits to clarify.
We didn't call mil to tell her off... She called dh and he made a light hearted comment as she brought it up. I love my mil and do encourage dc to share but dd1 seems to get treated as a special 1st grand child and dtds seem second to mil sometimes so I probably am over sensitive.
When I was pg with dtds she took dd1 out (which was a great help) but told people she was dd's mummy. Dd1 seemsto be her favourite and it does worry me a bit. There are many good sides to her so this isn't a I hate mil type thread.

that's a bit odd, the saying she's her mum bit. But maybe it just amused her. No real harm in it, on its own.

people will have favourites. or favourite ages. And the older child will know her better. It's hard to divide time.

I have several nieces and nephews 5 and under who all live close to each other but far away from me so I only see them on trips home. It's a nightmare trying to give presents of the same value being seen to be the same value to each one at christmas and dividing my time fairly. Giving enough attention to the 5 yr olds even though my personal pref is to play with toddlers. Seeing my favourite who sees me as her special aunt feel left out because I'm running after her younger sister, knowing that my other siblings can see I have favourites etc etc.

I have twins and a 2 yrs older ds1: I wouldn't care less about 1 present to share between twins at that age, I was more concerned about the tidal wave of stuff swamping my house and happiest with none at all.
However, I did play down the twin thing with my twins at first, I wanted them to be 2 individuals, but I actually think I may have gone too far. I now have to impress upon them how lucky they are to have each other and wish they could be nicer to each other.
Pretending she's her dd is freaky, sometimes that kind of thing calms down, sometimes it escalates-keep an eye out.

Your MIL saying that she's your DD's mummy is odd. But if that was a one off jokey thing, maybe not too much to worry about?

I don't ever want to be a MIL. It's too much like hard work.

Oh FFS. If your DCs were all the same age and she sent one book for them all to share that would be fine, surely. She's sent two books, each suitable for children of quite different ages, presumably, so it's entirely reasonable to think that twins could share in this case.

I'd see your point if she had sent them, say, one doll to share.

If you raise this perhaps you shouldn't expect anything in future as it's too much of a minefield and not worth the hassle and ingratitude.