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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To be annoyed at the meat consumed this week.

92 replies

IceBergJam · 17/03/2013 12:11

I did the shopping, protein to last two weeks. I was away for four days. Im cooking a roast today.

DH and DSS x 2 have gotten through

Two large packs of bacon
2kg chicken breast
600g mince
1 chorizo sausage
And today a roast chicken

DSS wont eat meals without meat protein, and wont fill up on veg and carbs. Had enough of the money spent out on food shopping.

I suggested cheap meal ideas, but they chomped through it for breakfast, packed lunch and dinner, plus pizzas and various crap potato products.

OP posts:
ohforfoxsake · 17/03/2013 14:26

They are 16 and 18 and you grate veg for them?

Bloody hell.

WhereYouLeftIt · 17/03/2013 14:28

So DH cooked all this fortnight's worth of meat in 4 days, to pander to suit his teenaged sons? Is he a Disney dad? Does he cave to whatever they want for fear of them disliking him?

I would honestly see him as being at fault the most here, regardless of his sons' fussy eating. He is the parent, the one in charge, the one who knows how much it costs and the one who should not have cooked all the meat.

LyingWitchInTheWardrobe2726 · 17/03/2013 14:28

Firstly, your DH is an adult and I know I'd be a bit uncomfortable reading this in reverse, with a husband dictacting what his wife can and can't eat. If money is an issue then your husband needs to agree to the weekly budget and once it's gone, it's gone.

Secondly, regarding the lasagne and 'sloppiness'... I hate it too. The best way to overcome it is cook it the day before. It 'sets' overnight and then you can just cut it into slices that don't 'slop'.

oldraver · 17/03/2013 14:36

My DS used to be like this, I once went away for a Saturday and Sunday leaving a 500g of mince and a pack of four chicken breasts and he ate the whole lot. He did get defensive when I asked about it and said he had to eat, but he would eat just the meat, too lazy to do carb or veg to go with it. I explained that he had eaten x amount of portions of meat and it should of made more meals.

My DB was the same when he was living with me, I once made a kilo of bolognese and told him to take some, when I came back he had piled up the meat leaving hardly any to freeze. He was fond of saying when offered food "I'll have loads of meat" er no you will have a portion. DS used to raise an eyebrow when I bought a side of salmon as he thought I would cut bigger chunks, I told him it defeated the point of buying in bulk to scoff more (though I do think the potions of supermarket salmon a bit stingy).

I would show them what is an adult portion and that you expect them not to scoffle the whole lot

freddiemisagreatshag · 17/03/2013 14:40

I dunno, mine always seemed to be starving and the meat was always really well padded out with veg. We did/do eat veggie meals 2 or 3 times a week as a minimum so it's not all a carnivore's wet dream though Grin I was feeding at least 7 adults/kids every night though, and a lot of nights 2 extra from up the road whose mother didn't cook much.

LyingWitchInTheWardrobe2726 · 17/03/2013 14:40

If it's an issue, perhaps OP could re-pack the meat into portions. That way nobody could say they weren't sure...

My husband is a meat fiend but we don't have this issue as he never cooks.

flippinada · 17/03/2013 14:44

Have read the op again and am grinding my teeth in irritation at DSS won't eat this, that and the other.

I understand that people, including children, are entitled to not like things (personally I can't bear peas, tiny green balls of yuck) but refusing to eat entire foods groups just reeks of spoilt and overindulged.

VelvetSpoon · 17/03/2013 14:50

Your issue surely is with your DH? He knows your family budget, presumably he also knew how long the meat was meant to last for? So why did he cook it all/allow it to be cooked (if your DSS did the cooking themselves) in just a few days?

I don't think you can expect to address their eating habits though, maybe if they were 8 and 6 but not at 18 and 16. My own experience is they won't eat it if they don't like it (it's not like a primary school child who will eat to not be hungry), snack/buy junk themselves instead, and perhaps end up spending less time at your house.

PeachActiviaMinge · 17/03/2013 14:53

Shame Freddie it sounded really good and I was/am feeling very jealous Grin I love chicken curry and one made with 2lb of chicken breast would have me feeling like I won the lotto! One day I won't have to scrimp on the meat and then I will get fatter

freddiemisagreatshag · 17/03/2013 14:55

My point is really more that a teenage boy will eat two normal sized plates of food - a normal dinner wouldn't fill a hole in his tooth Grin

LadyWidmerpool · 17/03/2013 14:57

I agree that your issue is with your husband.

flippinada · 17/03/2013 14:59

I concur that DH is the issue and that this kind if fussy eating is not going to change at this age, unless the fussy eater wants to do it for themselves.

IneedAsockamnesty · 17/03/2013 15:05

Anybody who is allowed to over eat as a child or used to over eating as a adult will quite happily continue to over eat.

Its not hunger it's habit.

IroningBoredDaily · 17/03/2013 15:08

Great idea to use half beef mince and half quorn skinnybitch

Pendipidy · 17/03/2013 15:12

You sound like you are talking about a couple of toddlers when they won't eat this and won't eat that. You dish up a normal meal and if they don't eat it, fine. Their choice. What are you, their slave? Stop enabling them .

FantasticDay · 17/03/2013 15:18

Difficult! Trying to thinks of quick filling non-sloppy, meatless meals - how about Spanish omelette, homemade pizza (bread machine dough or pizza dough mix), wraps, quorn sausages and beans, oven chips, peas and veggie burgers, tuna pasta bake with salad, veg and haloumi kebabs. Bit stuck after that...

Wishihadabs · 17/03/2013 15:20

Payday pasta aka pasta bake is your friend here I think

OhDearieDearieMe · 17/03/2013 15:31

I'm shocked at adults who won't eat something because it's 'sloppy'. Really? But really? I can completely understand not eating something because you don't like the taste of it but to write off whole dishes because they're 'sloppy'?

IntheFrame · 17/03/2013 15:43

I have known several men who don't like "sloppy food". many blame it on bad school lunches. For example gravy on a roast is a no no and quite a few don't like mash.
I didn't mind easy to cook for and all of them could cook themselves only needed a roasting dish/frying pan)

IceBergJam · 17/03/2013 16:10

Dearie, it isn't really sloppy, but wet. No soup, stews, mince or curries fried off. No sauce (so pasta mixed with tiny bit of sauce for flavour), no pies, beans on toast, gravey, and no 'bits'.

We tried various techniques over the years, but it just ended up with DSS becoming very distressed.Think 15 year old nearly in tears because he found a smudge of sauce on a burger he pulled to bits to look for things, and we refused a new one (resturant) . I don't believe he is like DSS 18 who is just bloody fussy. It is different. But ill go over to the fussy thread to discuss.

OP posts:
IceBergJam · 17/03/2013 16:11

Thanks for all replys. Lots to think about.

OP posts:
flippinada · 17/03/2013 17:10

It does sound like your DSS has some quite serious issues with food as opposed to being fussy or spoilt, as his behaviour - from what you've described - is extreme. Does he suffer with anxiety or anything like that?

Good luck.

Bobyan · 17/03/2013 17:34

At the risk of being harsh, you're being treated like a doormat. Stop cooking more than one meal, they are both old enough to cook for themselves and there is absolutely no reason why your DH can't shop and cook for them if you still want to keep babying them.

Inertia · 17/03/2013 17:41

If you need to shop fortnightly, can you adjust the timing so that the first week is when DSS are not there, the second week is when they are there, so at least they won't be able to help themselves to stuff that's been planned for meals?

Is there any way of labelling the meat "Tuesday's dinner" etc, then freeze? Or label anything available for lunches/ breakfasts , so they all know exactly what they can and can't tuck into for brerakfast/lunch/snack?

Can DH and DSS all be told to plan a dinner with x budget? And what food budget contribution does working DSS make?

TBH if a 16yo has issues that mean that he won't eat the range of foods you've outlined, he could cook for himself. I became veggie at 14 and cooked for myself thereafter, had to meal plan within budget.

If they won't eat potatoes, can you make the normal meal with a portion of meat and veg each, and if they don't want potatoes they can eat cheap bread to fill them up (or they could make their own bread). Or you could make whatever you're having plus a bowl of plain pasta and they can fill up on that if that's what they like.

If they'll eat salad/ peppers/ onions between them could you try stuffed pitta breads as an alternative to wraps? You could cook whatever meat is on special offer that week- maybe slow roast cheaper cuts? I sometimes do slow roast pork belly as a roast dinner for our family, that's usually reasonably priced as meat goes- plenty of yorkshires to fill up on as well.

If they'll eat rice- risotto or paella? Both can be made with veg so no meat needed.

Tapas style dinner- grilled ciabatta bread, some parma ham, roast veg, Spanish omelette, garlic mushrooms, patatas bravas.

Curry - plenty of poppadoms, naan or chapatis, rice, some tandoori style chicken would be relatively dry, plus whatever curry the rest of you like.

HFW has a recipe for quite a versatile flatbread that you could dish up alongside grilled meat and mix-and-match salad.

Hot dogs/ burgers - plenty of buns to fill up on, plus salad/ corn on the cob/ coleslaw.

TeWiSavesTheDay · 17/03/2013 17:43

The fussiness sounds very tough, and I sympathise.

I think if you want to keep control on your budget you've git 2 issues, your DH should have known not to cook all that meat, and to refuse to cook Bacon/chicken for breakfast/lunch when there were alternatives.

Did he just not realise? In which case maybe you need a use your brain chat! But also a meal plan which also specifies which options are available for lunch breakfast. If he knows the Bacon is for a dinner, he's got no excuse cooking it for breakfast. Same with the kids if they cook for themselves - they need to check the meal plan.

The other slightly more desperate option is if at all possible, give in and only buy 1/2 days worth of food at a time.