to have strong words with ex if he takes his girlfriend to our DD's parents evening?

[alisunshine29]

I posted last week about my daughters father celebrating mother's day with DD(5.5) and his girlfriend. Now I think he's planning to take his girlfriend along to parents evening with him. I'd asked if he wanted me to make an appointment at any particular time so he could get there from work, assuming we'd go together as we're fairly amicable. He said he wasn't sure what time so to just get latest possible appointment. I got the time slot letter today and it had DD's name and mum in brackets. Teacher said DD's dad has made a separate appointment an hour earlier - a time which allows him enough time to go and collect his girlfriend. They have only been together a year, DD has seen her probably twenty times at most and I'm getting fed up of them trying to infer she's DD's parent too. I let the mother's day thing go and didn't say anything but think taking the girlfriend to parents evening instead of us going together (particularly when we have joint concerns we'd discussed sharing) is taking it too far. AIBU?

I think your reaction is very measured and understandable. Don't over react and please attend his appointment - this will feed into his/her need for drama (if that's what it is) and cast you in the wrong light in front of staff and other parents. If it were me I'd say you'd like to go together but if not then you're glad he and his partner are taking such an interest. Let him know that you'd be open to discussing it after as well, if he wants. This will take the sting out of how you're feeling and he'll either respond well because he is being genuine, or he'll be gutted he hasn't got the rise out of you. He will be bringing his new girlfriend around your daughter regardless of what you say, from the sounds of it, so you really need to not wind yourself up over things you can't change anyway.

ZOMBIE ALERT

I'm a stepmum too LittleGreen1. I've never felt it right that I go to a parents evening. I parent, I love my stepson, but I think parents evening is for the actual parents. My husband always discusses what's been said when he gets home. I always went to the prize givings and we often ended up sitting with his mum too.

I think that, initially, my husband's ex tried to play happy families with her second husband. We got told that my stepson must go home on Father's Day, even though it was my husband's weekend, to go out for a Father's Day meal with his stepdad. Thankfully the second marriage died anyway and she's never found anyone else who could put up with her in the last eight years, and now stepson's pretty much grown up.

Is there really much to discuss age 5??. I'd be inclined to let them get on with it.you make your own appointment and take dd with you.let him do as he pleases..she will probably get pregnant soon and the novatly of yr dd will wear off,

As if we don't have enough trouble with clowns, now we have zombies lurking in every corner ...

No fucking way! I fell for it!
littlegreen what are you playing at?