To think the difference between the top and bottom pics could be the secret to the mil/dil divide?

[MyDarlingClementine]

www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-2286132/Women-piling-pounds-cut-housework-study-shows.html

Started another thread on this - as the pics tickled me but I couldnt work out why.

Now I do - I think its because alot of mil/dil probs come because we have changed so much in our roles - ( women) since them and us - and they see sons coming home to pic 1 which could be me and they get upset?

I think its swings and roundabouts really. Yes, young wives 50 years ago did not slob around in track suits and trainers; and often did the hoovering in high heels and dainty aprons.
But by the time they were in their forties a lot of them had settled into middle age with greying permed hair and sensible clothes.

Tbh, I find the bottom picture much more worrying/nauseating than the top one.

Daily mail in 'women: get back in the kitchen' shocker.

I am a one woman minimalist so none of the bits even belong to me, doubly demotivating.

On the plus side my husband did say it was nice to live with someone who was relaxed, his mum is not a comfortable person to be around. But I do admire those who live in a nice environment and are relaxed. Of course my DH will not put stuff away, because he never learned to organise himself. And I am lazy have refused to be a "mother" to him. We get on well but the house often looks messy...

Lance you just toss it. I know it's not that easy. Find a big box to toss it all in. Then whoever owns it can rummage through it when they need something '

newshoots. I'm really good at coming up with the ideas.

Not quite as good putting them into practice.

A shoo-in for a senior management role I think!

I was going to say: of course they worked harder. They had no washers or dishwashers or tumble driers or central heating or a lot of stuff that meant the same work took more time and energy than it does today.

What a stupid article.

My mother and my MIL think I should hire a cleaner and I don't even work full time. That's what they both did/do.

newshoots,

same here - we are deliberlty relaxed here due to the extreme cleaning habits of MIL..which permeated every part of poor DH life.

What shocked me was that people spend 13.3 hours on housework each week. I did 2 hours yesterday and thought that was good

MILs should remember one thing about their DILS, before getting annoyed over any generational/domestic differences: this is who your son freely chose to marry (unless it was an arranged marriage, in which case, for heaven's sake you stupid woman, it's all your fault, what on earth were you thinking?)

If you are disappointed that your son doesn't have the taste in women you feel he ought to have, have a word with yourself. And your husband. And then perhaps your son. But not your DIL. She wasn't to know.

very true Eldritch!

Well said, Eldritch.

They had no gadgets but they also didn't drive so no ferrying of kids, popping to the supermarket.

We kids cycled to school and anything else we went to, or walked, and we could amuse ourselves out of doors.

The grocers van came to the door.

Much less choice of food so simpler meals. DM had someone come in to help clean once a week.

The washing was a big chore but done once a week on a monday, not constantly like now, so .........basically we work as hard (or harder imo) but at different stuff.

But people were more smartly dressed, keeping up appearances was a big thing.

Pic 1 - tonight at mine!

For me it's not so much less housework, but doing a desk job & driving to work. I used to cycle to work pre DC but now I have to collect 2 DC after work car is essential.

Desk jobs = on bum all day, not on feet moving around.

13 hours housework a week - I'd be living in a spotless eat off the floor place. I probably do 3 max but we do have a small place

We do about three/four max.

Yes BeCool there is a shift in size between the generations. In general we are more sedentary and it applies to both sexes.

Thanks Eldritch, I think my mil is totally flummoxed at her son's choice!

Those pictures are gross caricatures of our very real differences. She also dresses smartly and buys shoes to match each new outfit. Who knew people other than the Queen and Imelda Marcos did that?!

Coralanne -- we already have a box like that.

It's called the living room.

imho the 50s housewife is a myth.
10 years earlier the first picture would have been different, the man would be in uniform or absent, the woman hair in a headscarf,
Women were being encouraged to work "for the war effort" nurseries were booming to provide childcare.
The when the war was over it was men that needed jobs so where to put the women?
hmm kitchen

btw I was much less fat than my mil

Daily mail in 'women: get back in the kitchen' shocker.

^ that^

Perhaps Rat but alot of mils have been brought up at a cross over time and some of them still want to be perfect HW and are upset when thier dils dont want to please their sons like they tried to please thier DH

I actually think my mil loves the fact that I'm not her son's servant. My fil is so selfish and messy and she is constantly cleaning up after him. He has diabetes and will not take care of his own medication, it's up to her to do it. It's up to her to sort out a suitable menu and cook it.
They are both retired, she spends the days cooking, cleaning and generally faffing around. He spends them in front of the tv watching rugby and football and any other sport that might possibly be on.

I keep the house as tidy as I can during the week, but with a demanding baby it's difficult to find the time. We do the proper cleaning together at the weekend.

I'm a SAHM, my priority is my reflux suffering, demanding 6 month old. Then my own health and wellbeing. I'd rather burn off the calories doing what I want than religiously cleaning the house. OH appreciates and likes that.

I am quite postive my mil certainly sees me as pic 1.

Cherish that mil Velve!

Clementine I think we are living parallel lives!