Surprised that friends would never travel alone?

[OnTheOpenRoad]

Had to travel to Paris last week for a work meeting, but thankfully actually got to see the city too. I caught the Eurostar there and used the metro, had a fab time.

My friends were shocked that - firstly I dared to get the Eurostar by myself and secondly that I used the metro - again by myself.

I remember them being surprised that I wasn't bothered about getting a train to London by myself and using the Underground.

At least 3 of my friends were shocked and said "I could never do that" - and before people say it's to do with anxiety it really isn't, they would just never dare do something like that.

I'm not saying "wow look at me I'm so confident" - because I found it a struggle to but I like to challenge myself. Then again it's really not hard to get to a train station, look at the huge departure board and then find the platform.

It just makes me a bit sad that some people would pass up good opportunities purely because they would never do it alone even though they more than capable of doing so.

Obviously there are exceptions.

Some people just don't see the attraction. It's probably pointless trying to convince them otherwise. I've taken my son to various places (all Western, all with hot water and proper cooking facilities and public transport and taxis etc. ie unlike many of the places I travelled to before I had him) and had friends and family remark about how 'brave' I am. What, for getting on a frigging plane? And I was speaking to a man I recently dated about how I want to retire somewhere hot because I really really do and he said "But why would you want to go abroad?" Again, he just didn't get it.

I suppose some people are more settled than others, and maybe I would have had an easier ride through life if I wasn't quite as restless as I am, so in a way I'm kind of envious of them.

i dont know anyone who would have an issue getting on the tube by themselves

I'm not a massive travel person (lots to keep me here!), but I don't understand people who actively fear it. I've been abroad for work by myself and semi regularly drive the length and breadth of the country alone. My mother is apprehensive of "long" drives and motorways, which I don't really understand. A friend of mine who is much more socially confident doesn't like driving in new places with lots of traffic, which I understand more (inner city one way systems you don't know with no sat nav are a bit of a pig) but it would never have occured to me if she hadn't mentioned it.

It's strange the way people think and rationalise things. and that includes myself

And I was speaking to a man I recently dated about how I want to retire somewhere hot because I really really do and he said "But why would you want to go abroad?" Again, he just didn't get it

I can understand that. For all its failings, I love the UK and want to live here (not where I am now!) forever I can't imagine leaving the UK and living in a different land without the beautiful and familiar landscapes we have here. It's nice to visit other places, but I always want to come home to Britain after. It's not fear, it's just love of the country

Nomads versus Settlers - its how things started with people, doesn't mean anyone is better than anyone else, just that they have different instincts.

I'm not a worrier on my own account having traveled far and wide for work.

However DD is planning to have a year abroad as part of her degree. I was looking at the accommodation and will confess to having had a private wibble at the idea of leaving DD in one of the halls - forrin was fine but this particular hall looked scary!

I have often travelled alone- overseas plane journey alone when 13 to stay with family, European cities, train from Norway to Sweden ( i don't speak either language) and Egypt ( to meet a friend out there) with connections and some travelling with others I met out there. So doesn't faze me, getting Eurostar isn't much different to get the train in the uk? However I did all these things before I had children, now I am much more anxious, but I still would do it.
I amazed people won't do these unless they have an anxiety disorder. I know lots of anxious people who won't use the tube and the 7/7 bombings made this worse.

I do think it's like a muscle though. I used to travel loads for work, went all over the place, but I work from home now so going into town is like a big treat. When I took DS to that there London for last half-term I was surprised and a bit disappointed with myself to find I was a bit antsy about it. Was fine once I got there - it all kicked back in - but I was stressed about the train and connections and things

I'm going to Chandlers Ford tomorrow for a root canal treatment.

"here be monsters" seems to cover the case quite aptly

can't I go on the Eurostar instead?

I would have done this when I was younger but now I am older and have lived in a backwater for years, I am scared of my own shadow

I get this a lot. Also had how can you take small children abroad? Dd3 went to New York at 5 weeks (I was tourist with 4 kids while dh was working - take the opportunities where you can!) and Bahamas at 4 months - that was a very good year.

Dd3 is now just 9 and went to visit her sis at university 200 miles away with her 17 year old big sister dd2. Can't believe how many adults I know were shocked I let them go across London together.

Don't worry what others think - just enjoy the experience. Travel's one of the best things you can do in my not too limited experience!! I love that my dd1 at 19 can sort a trip to the Far East or anywhere. I am proud I've done my job because she's independent and happy to think, pay and travel for herself.

I love travelling alone. The peace, no whining, no moaning. I also like to observe parents with their children and find myself feeling smug because I am childfree for the day/weekend.

Nailak, I do, and we're only 50 miles from London. I know quite a lot of mums who would never venture into London without their husbands.

When travelling last year (with a group of 16 15/16 year olds so not really alone!) we met a 60ish year old man from Darwin who had saved up since his children left home then taken a year's sabbatical from work and was travelling around Africa until his money ran out or he needed to get back to work. Being alone he was completely free to go wherever and do whatever he wanted, and he was chatting to anyone and making friends as he went, staying in hostels and hotels if he wanted company or camping if he didn't. I was so envious! One day.....

I haven't travelled abroad alone, but only because the situation has just mever come up, I don't think I would be too fazed by it. I have travelled alone in the UK since I was about 17/18. When I was applying to Uni I went to all my interviews on the train by myself. And recently I have taken ds away with me on holiday just the two of us quite often. We always have a great time!

I have also (when younger and not in a relationship) gone to lots of concerts alone. If I hadn't gone alone I would have missed out altogether, which would have been a shame.

I don't get people who are overly worried about travelling alone, it's just not something I've ever worried about, I used to travel all over the place on my own for my first 'proper' job when I was about 21, and even before that I'd been to London on my own visiting family on the train.

I travelled to Barcelona on my own and stayed with friends there, got in a taxi with just their address on a piece of paper, didn't have a clue where I was going, lol, I see it as a bit of an advernture!

A friend of mine won't do the London tube by herself. We live on the outer reaches of two of the lines and my mum took me and my sis on "adventures" up town all the time. I have no issue with it at all but when friend wanted to go up to a particular wedding dress shop, I had to meet her at her nearest tube and escort her in, rather than just meeting at the shop. She also won't ring a restaurant to book a table or order for herself, especially as she usually wants something left out of the item, she makes me do it. When we go out with DHs she asks him if she'll like certain things, drives me crazy!!

The only reason I don't travel alone more is because it is prohibitively expensive :( If it were cheaper I would never bother with companions. But I see why people find it daunting. Not getting the train to another uk city, or refusing to go to the cinema or something alone, is a bit pathetic though.

My friend's MIL is aghast that she occasionally travels in to London for work. The fact that she's 40 years old doesn't seem to make MIL any less anxious.

The fact that MIL reads the Daily Mail may have something to do with her belief that the world is a Terribly Dangerous Place.

I absolutely love travelling alone. I've travelled to Canada several times, with connecting flights at Heathrow/Amsterdam/New York/Detroit. I've travelled in the UK on my own a few times.

It's great just reading, listening to music, gazing into space, talking to other people if you want to - but not talking if you don't, eating in whatever restaurant you want, when you want, afternoon naps - the list goes on.

I fully intend travelling more for as long as I possibly can.

Bliss.

When young I travelled alone and loved it. Now, I'd rather stay in the peace and quiet of my own home with no airport queuing, or not being able to lift my overweight case off the conveyor belt, going to the wrong gate stress. All much too exhausting for me. Last time I enjoyed a holiday abroad on my own was March 2009 in Malaga.

I cannot believe the mean attitudes on here. Calling people "weedy" etc.

Some of us are more nervous than others....it doesn't mean we're weedy...or that you're better than us.

This thread has been an eye opener for me. I have often travelled alone, and have been to some fairly remote places. It has honestly never really occurred to me that others might find that too daunting - most of my friends have travelled and I don't know if I know anyone who might feel like this. Well, my mum maybe...

I don't think its weedy though. Just different comfort zones I guess. Some people have mentioned driving on here - I do drive long distances down the motorway if I have to, and would never not go somewhere because I didn't fancy driving, but I don't particularly relish long drives or driving in unfamiliar cities, and I can see why some people might choose to avoid this. It's harder for me to relate to those who wouldn't go abroad, but fair enough if some people don't want to.

I guess all of us impose limits on ourselves in different ways. Sad if it stops people from doing stuff they really want to do though.

I'm amazed that this thread even exists. If I didn't get on planes/trains and automobiles on my own I wouldn't have a job. For some of us solo travel isn't really optional.

And then I remember my aunt - who was surprised I managed to drive 100 miles to go and see her. I think she forgot I've flown to Australia and NZ on my own!

The only thing I'm wary of is travelling in the developing world on my own - australia/ canada/ new zealand/ US/ europe. Been there done that got the solo traveller t-shirt. Developing world - only done that on a group. I would manage a trip for a meeting it isn't the travelling per se that is the issue more the local arrangements, going out for food etc.

I've decided that for my retirement I'm going to decamp abroad for 6 months of the year (different country each year). Rent a flat and become 'local' using the flat as a baseboard to explore the country in more detail. I'd LOVE to live in NY/ Paris.. name another world city. Only 32 years to go.

Really? I do not think I even know anyone like this.

Maybe it is an islander thing? Those Brits!