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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To think that children shouldn't be allowed to jump on this gravestone?

65 replies

hiddenhome · 21/02/2013 16:21

I was in Durham Cathedral this morning and we were sitting in St Cuthberts tomb area. There is a small altar and then St Cuthbert's stone laid out flat on the floor with him underneath in his tomb.

Along comes mum, grandma and two kids - one looked about 12 and the other about 9 or 10. They just started running all over the stone and around the altar and the adults just ignored them and read the info on St Cuthbert instead Shock You're not meant to go on that area at all and they ran onto the tapestry hassocks which line the tomb area too. Poor St Cuthbert Sad

I almost said something, but bottled it 'cos I didn't want to cause an argument in the Cathedral Hmm Instead, I just sat and hoisted my judgeypants and glared at them, but they didn't notice.

AIBU to think this is disrespectful and that the adults should have said something?

(They couldn't do it to St Bede 'cos he's up on a plinth Smile)

OP posts:
Tailtwister · 21/02/2013 16:22

YANBU, very disrespectful imo and the adults should have stopped it. I'm not religious, but I respect those who are and know there's a certain code of behaviour which is expected in a place of worship.

Original poster
hiddenhome · 21/02/2013 16:23

here

OP posts:
Cherriesarelovely · 21/02/2013 16:23

It is disrespectful. I take my Year R class over to our local church and talk to them about the way we treat the building and everything in it with respect, they are brilliantly behaved. Yanbu.

CloudsAndTrees · 21/02/2013 16:50

YANBU. I would expect a child to know how to behave somewhere like that long before they got to 9 years old, but then if they have lazy half arsed parents, I suppose it's not their fault.

HoHoHoNoYouDont · 21/02/2013 16:50

YANBU

nickelbabe · 21/02/2013 16:52

YANBU

BeerTricksPotter · 21/02/2013 16:56

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

PandaNot · 21/02/2013 16:57

I'm surprised someone from the cathedral didn't tell them to stop, they're a bit scary in there IME, not that we've ever been on the receiving end of it! YANBU.

Sparklingbrook · 21/02/2013 17:00

YANBU. Sad

tallulah · 21/02/2013 17:02

It doesn't surprise me :( We went into a little old church to visit once and it was full of other visitors shouting, eating, children racing around. I just think people have forgotten how to behave. (or they think their DC can do whatever they like)

Sirzy · 21/02/2013 17:06

Yanbu. Children should be taught that some places are not for running around and churches are one of them.

thebody · 21/02/2013 17:06

Yes agree its awful. How can children learn respect if its not taught them by their parents.

Tallulla put it well.

Latara · 21/02/2013 17:07

YANBU; horrible brats.

Latara · 21/02/2013 17:07

Sorry i should say ignorant parents really!

catlady1 · 21/02/2013 17:08

YANBU, they should be taught not to jump on anybody's gravestone. It's not about religion at all, just having a bit of respect.

LegoAcupuncture · 21/02/2013 17:09

Yanbu, total lack of respect.

I love Durham cathedral and know the room you're asking about. Was there not a curator in there? Usually is.

Narked · 21/02/2013 17:10

'Horrible brats.' Really? More like shit parents.

MrsLouisTheroux · 21/02/2013 17:13

Shit parents and horrible brats.

Narked · 21/02/2013 17:14

If they have parents like that what chance do they have at that age?

PigeonPair · 21/02/2013 17:32

This is basically another example of parents not teaching their children how they need to behave in certain situations/places. Drives me crazy.

Flobbadobs · 21/02/2013 17:35

YANBU. Obviously they have no scary Vergers like the one at York, we went and he eyeballed us along with all the other parents with children and kept popping up everywhere.
DS was a toddler at the time, fast asleep in his buggy and stayed that way until we left. I saw him approach at least one family asking them to keep the noise down, maybe Durham needs him!

EndoplasmicReticulum · 21/02/2013 17:47

Do you think St Cuthbert would mind?

The goths at Whitby have got into trouble for having their photos taken looking gothy near graves in the church. I suppose it's a similar idea - do you think this is disrespectful?

www.whitbygazette.co.uk/lifestyle/entertainment/goth-photographers-in-a-row-over-graves-1-3824829

I think when I'm dead I won't mind if people dance on my grave. Not that I'm going to have one, but if I did I wouldn't mind some jumping.

SelfconfessedSpoonyFucker · 21/02/2013 17:57

yes, how dare the children have fun in church. They should sit quietly and be bored out of their tiny little minds like I did when I was a respectful child in church.

I am now an atheist and as an adult still find church dreadfully boring.

St Cuthbert is dead, he isn't around to mind and neither are any of his grieving relatives. I do understand that as a relic we should preserve it and be careful with it, but I'm not sure why respect comes into it. The dead are dead. Either they are no longer around and have nothing to care with or are sitting wearing white on some cloud not really caring about little children having fun.

kim147 · 21/02/2013 18:03

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Birdsgottafly · 21/02/2013 18:06

10 and 12 are not little, different if they were 2 and 3 year olds.

If they have no interest in looking at the archiecture, enjoying the atmosphere/peace, or learning about the history, they shouldn't go in, to start with.

They should at least show respect for those that are in the Church and don't want it turned into a playground.

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