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Original poster

To think it is ridiculous that the school have confiscated MY phone????

380 replies

Slipperyslopin · 15/02/2013 16:27

DS (14) was going out last night with a friend to see a movie after school. He didn't know when it ended and then we couldn't find it on the website so I told him to take his phone so he could call me afterwards and I could collect him. He told me his phone wasn't charged, so I gave him my one. He is very trustworthy and careful and I knew he wouldn't lose it, besides I'm not on call at the moment so I wouldn't need it during the day, and I'd rather he had a way to contact me if needed. During school the phone turned on in his pocket (Iphones Angry ) and an alert went off for an update or something. His teacher heard it and confiscated the phone as they are not allowed in school, even if off. DS then had to call me from the office to say he would use his friends phone instead. All fine, fair enough I thought. However I then found out that the school policy is to keep the phone for a fortnight. I have unpredictable shift patterns and I actually do need that phone back, it has important work contacts on and is the number I am generally contacted on by whole family as we don't have a landline atm. So I went in and explained the situation and they REFUSED to return it! They've said they're keeping it for the full 2 weeks. I told them, it's a work phone, it has confidential stuff on it, it has all my work contacts and is an emergency number for DH on his passport, and as he is in France at the moment I needed that phone back. They just kept repeating that it is policy and they can't return it, I even had the head teacher tell me this! Surely it's against the law! I need that phone and they WILL NOT return it to me! What should I do? Can I get some form of legal action done here? This feels a hell of a lot like theft to me. I'm so beyond angry at them, any advice?

OP posts:
Floggingmolly · 16/02/2013 20:06

Op, do you really believe that your phone "turned itself on for an update" in your son's pocket? Because I've had an iPhone for the last 5 years and this is most assuredly not one of their features.

ravenAK · 16/02/2013 20:06

FWIW, our school is lucky enough to have very sporadic phone reception.

As soon as I leave & start walking up the hill, my own phone leaps into life & at least 6 texts appear, mostly from the dc's school (nit outbreak, second hand uniform sale, lollipop lady's off sick etc etc).

All members of the wider school community know that if you attempt to send a text in from outside, the chances of it being seen whilst the recipient is on the premises are slimmish. There are bits of the grounds/one or two top floor classrooms where users of some networks can wave a phone in the air & get a bar or two...

...but everyone knows that if you actually need to contact your pupil dc or teacher spouse, & you need to guarantee they'll get the message, you ring the office & the office send a runner.

No-one, to my knowledge, has ever missed a vital message for lack of a functioning mobile.

They aren't necessary. Equally, they aren't the devil's plaything either - you just need a sensible policy, & everyone switches off.

cloutiedumpling · 16/02/2013 20:11

I agree that kids may not need phones at school but what about after the end of the school day? As I understand it, this kid was not going home and would be using the phone to contact his mum later in the evening. Most public phone boxes have disappeared with the growth of mobile phones, meaning that a mobile phone is perhaps more important to people. If schools had lockers for every pupil this problem could perhaps be avoided to some extent - the pupils could put the phones in their lockers and only access them at dinner breaks or after school.

maisiejoe123 · 16/02/2013 20:13

If you dont want to risk a phone being 'stolen' from you - then just dont allow it to go into the school. Then you wont risk it being turned on by accident, turned on unexpectedly, fault on the phone that FORCED it to start to ring etc etc.

If you really really need to get a message to your child and it is urgent then leave a message with the school office. When sadly many years ago I had a family tragedy I got the message when I was in class within mins of my mother calling.

ravenAK · 16/02/2013 20:17

Yes, I agree they might need them on the way home (or special circs like thebody's dd).

We allow them & they cause very little bother - the kids keep them in the bottom of their bags, switched off. Very occasionally one will go off because its owner has forgotten, & our weird reception has flickered momentarily into life, whereupon they are confiscated without fuss.

But if you do get your phone taken off you & parents take a few days getting into school to collect it, urgent parental messages would still get through. You just might have to curtail your social life a bit after school...

maisiejoe123 · 16/02/2013 20:18

Just chipping in here. All schools, day or boarding have an issue. The kids are obsessed with them and the dreaded BBM.

My DS's school tried to take them away before school and then give them back at the end of the day. It was a complete nightmare. Boys put in fake, or cheap phones and kept the real one, they claimed they were damaged, they were lost etc etc. Some were never claimed back....

So, shock horror, they allowed the boys to take responsibility for the phones themselves. If they went off in lessons they were taken away for 1 week, if they went off in an exam (well my son had the shock of his life and will never do it again). All parents and boys signed to say they agreed to the rules. Of course in a family emergency you would call the school office and a runner would be sent to the class.

There is NO reason to have full access to our children whilst they are at school. If you really want to do this then perhaps Home Education is the best option!

thebody · 16/02/2013 20:29

Sorry maisy perhaps you know more than the school psychiatrist then.

If my dd had been home educated she wouldn't have been in the fatal school trip.

I find your remarks very upsetting.

Enough now for me.

ShipwreckedAndComatose · 16/02/2013 21:09

Thebody, I am sorry for your dd's experience, that must be beyond distressing xx

I think backing a way from his thread would be right for you now.

ShipwreckedAndComatose · 16/02/2013 21:10

'Away' and 'this'

Snazzynewyear · 16/02/2013 21:28

Firstly, I don't believe the 'it just switched itself on' story any more than anyone else except the OP does. Having got a phone with him, it was too tempting not to use it, it seems.

Secondly - and I don't think this has been mentioned yet - the problem actually stemmed from the son having been careless and not charged his phone. If the OP had said either 'that's a shame, because as I won't know when to pick you up, now you won't be able to go / now you will have to walk home and suffer the attendant risks' he would have learned the consequences. As it was, the OP took on herself all the consequences and inconvenience of him not bothering to charge his phone. Perhaps next time she should make sure he carries the can from the start!

ShipwreckedAndComatose · 16/02/2013 21:32

Totally agree!

thebody · 16/02/2013 22:04

Thanks ship xx

FryOneFatManic · 16/02/2013 22:37

cloutiedumpling
I agree that kids may not need phones at school but what about after the end of the school day? As I understand it, this kid was not going home and would be using the phone to contact his mum later in the evening. Most public phone boxes have disappeared with the growth of mobile phones, meaning that a mobile phone is perhaps more important to people. If schools had lockers for every pupil this problem could perhaps be avoided to some extent - the pupils could put the phones in their lockers and only access them at dinner breaks or after school.

I agree with cloutiedumpling about children needing to have their phones available before/after school.

Phone boxes have disappeared with astonishing rapidity around here, yesterday I saw the new paving where the latest phone box has been taken away. I think there's only one left in the whole of our town centre, and I'm not even sure about that.

I still think a sensible policy of children having their phones available, perhaps in a locker, but switched off suring lessons is the best compromise.

There's absolutely no point in reminiscing about what happened years ago, because that world has long disappeared and we have to learn how to live in the present with all the new technology.

HopingItllBeOK · 16/02/2013 23:15

As more people have got mobile phones, the need for public phone boxes has dropped and so the number of them has decreased leading to more people getting mobile phones because there are no phone boxes in their area. Simple cause and effect.

I'm a little on the fence about the need for children to have phones in secondary schools. DS2 has a mobile phone. 2 days a week he has sports training after school, on the premises. By the time he finishes the office has closed so there is no option for him to use the school phone to ring home or for me to leave an urgent message for him. On one of the sports club days his step-dad picks him up from the baths over the road to take him to football training as there isn't time to get home and back out again. Quite often DP gets held up at work (breakdown trade so very unpredictable) so is running late or can't get out at all so DS's mobile is needed to let him know that either DP is running late but will be there so he should wait but no need to worry, or that DP can't make it so DS should walk home.

Without taking a mobile into school DS would either end up missing his football training twice a month because DP was late but DS had no way of knowing that so started walking home and by the time DP has trawled the streets and found him it is too late to make training, or he would be hanging around in a swimming pool car park for half an hour when DP wasn't coming before then trudging home.

Because of that I would take a dim view of a school banning any phones in school at all. That said, DS knows that his phone must be off during school hours and that if it goes off, I will fully support the school if they confiscate it. DS doesn't need it during school hours, but he does sometimes need it at home time or afterwards when doing after school activities in school.

FamiliesShareGerms · 16/02/2013 23:35

What Snazzy said

And you were completely ridiculous to lend your work phone to anyone at all as it is so important (and a sackable offence for both me and my DH, though we work for different companies)

FamiliesShareGerms · 16/02/2013 23:37

And some of the examples given of why children "need" a mobile in school make me wander why it was ok to have to manage these inconveniences in the pre-mobile days, but now it is vital for both children and parents to be completely contactable at all time

Wowserz129 · 16/02/2013 23:49

They sound loopy! What a load of crap! For a start who do they think they are to take a phone for 2 weeks in the first place! And second to not give it back when you explained it's yours.

Tell them you will call the police!

nailak · 17/02/2013 00:03

because there were phone boxes in the premobile days.

Mrscupcake23 · 17/02/2013 00:12

I know children do not need phones but now it is a way of life. I am not allowed my phone at work but I always have a sneaky look at it. If my teenagers don't have their phones or pick them up I ground them so would not want the school taking them away.

The body sorry to hear about your daughter and sorry about some people's attitudes on here if speaking to you helps her get through this awful time then yes she does need her phone.

SelfconfessedSpoonyFucker · 17/02/2013 06:35

I always know when my almost 17yr old is eating lunch (and has his phone) because I get a string of texts. I love hearing from him during the day, he tells me all sorts of stuff he wouldn't otherwise tell me and is much more chatty that way. He also drives to school occasionally and I like him to call before he leaves as he is a new driver and I'm sure school wouldn't love it if he came and used their phone every day he drives. He has never had his phone taken away though for using it in class, he has however had it taken away by us because of poor grades, so he obviously doesn't 'need' it.

So our experience with him and a phone and school has been a positive one.

TheChimpParadox · 17/02/2013 07:44

Technology and the way of life has moved on incredibly over the last 10 - 15 years so we can't really have the attitude of 'well managed in my day '.

Do we all really need computers at home ? If we work at home yes but other than that ? - I would hate to me without my computer - but I have to manage my time on it - children need to learn to mange their time on phones hence having the guidelines set down by the school.

Technology is here - embrace it and work with it and learn how to use it sensibly. Grin

FamiliesShareGerms · 17/02/2013 08:06

Generally I agree that mobiles are a normal part of life now, but I still don't reckon there's anything really wrong with DC having to wait a bit for a parent to come and pick them up and not bring in constant touch, for example. (Child of a father who routinely forgot to collect her from various places here!)

Besides, phone boxes were never a reliable method of communication (broken vandalised, just wouldn't take the 20p given for the purpose of making a phone call...) and unless the other person had a mobile or was with their landline you couldn't get hold of them anyway.

BoneyBackJefferson · 17/02/2013 08:45

TheChimpParadox

"Technology is here - embrace it and work with it and learn how to use it sensibly."

If I didn't have to deal with the fall out from pupils who don't use it sensibly then I would agree.
But pupils do not use it sensibly, and that is why schools have rules in place.

TheChimpParadox · 17/02/2013 08:54

Boney - that's why I also said

''children need to learn to mange their time on phones hence having the guidelines set down by the school''

ByTheWay1 · 17/02/2013 08:58

Mobiles are a part of some people's life - I don't own one.. I have a land line with an answer phone, I have a landline phone at work, if I am out and about I don't want to be contacted anyhow. I have never had an emergency when an hour or 2 would have made a blind bit of difference - maybe just lucky, maybe people know I don't have a mobile, so manage to cope without me.

People also turn up ON TIME when meeting me - or cancel things WITH NOTICE because they know I don't have one.