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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

To think it is kind of smug when people say

94 replies

AThousandNamesNoneOfThemMyOwn · 13/02/2013 23:33

(Re their babies) "he just eats whatever we eat"

Don't know why. It sort of says "we're so chilled-out, we make our child fit in with our life, we cook from scratch every night,, our DC isn't fussy with food"

All my friends seem to say this and I'm not really sure why it grates. Maybe because DS (9 mths) only 'eats what we eat' part of the time, because we are busy and disorganised and sometimes only manage a pizza delivery or Indian takeaway or just toast. And because DS is going through a ridiculously fussy phase. It just isn't always practical.

OP posts:

Wishihadabs · 15/02/2013 07:08

I think it depends on the age of the dcs. I can't stand children of more than 7ish being given nuggets and chips at 5pm . Then the adults eat properly at 830. Very weird and English. The diet of British teenagers is appalling and I think this plays a large role.IMO older children need to be part of family meals.

However there is no joy in cajoling a 2.5 year old and fussiness is quite normal at that age, as is needing to be fed at an ungodly early hour.

Wishihadabs · 15/02/2013 07:11

However there is no joy in cajoling a 2.5 year old and fussiness is quite normal at that age, as is needing to be fed at an ungodly early hour.

Wishihadabs · 15/02/2013 07:16

I see your OP refers to babies (e.g.; under ones). I would just smile and wave, most 1 year old s will eat anything, most 2 year olds won't c'est L.A. vie

FadBook · 15/02/2013 07:16

Karate - same here, dd would notice in a flash if we were eating something different to her and would see it as injustice!! She's only 18 months

I've used that line, I think most BLW people do as it is something we genuinely do. But I don't say it smugly, just that feeding a child doesn't have to be a big deal. It can be relaxed and doesn't mean you're cooking 5 different meals, mashing or puréeing food

There's a thread recently under weaning comparing how much babies/toddlers are eating and I've commented a few times that They're. All. Different!! Unless medically, they're not "thriving" then you don't need to worry about their food intake.

If I cook a bit extra i'll freeze it for my "nights off", ie a night off from dd and we have takeaway after she's gone to bed, the little meals in the freezer come in handy then! She is fond of a bit of dominoes though!!

The only thing I've changed is not adding salt to cooking (although I still use normal stock as the minute amount dd will get is fine) and having natural or Greek yoghurt in the fridge to 'tone down' anything maybe a bit too spicy, but she never seems that fussed about it being hot DP loves his madras

JugsMcGee · 15/02/2013 07:28

I don't mention it unless someone asks me what he eats. We all have the same meal, but at nearly 2 he doesn't always eat it. I don't use salt in cooking. I usually just bung it all in the slow cooker in the morning. And yes if we're having a biscuit with a cup of tea then he can have a biscuit too.

We did blw because he refused to be spoon fed but shovelled it in with his hands.

Except Saturday night takeaway. We wait til he's in bed for that!

Alibabaandthe40nappies · 15/02/2013 09:10

Ours eat what we eat, they don't like everything but I don't cook different food for them.

I hardly ever used jars, they are the most disgusting, bland, vile thing imaginable. And then people wonder why their 2 year olds won't eat anything - because they were weaned onto tasteless mush!

dashoflime · 15/02/2013 09:33

See, I think mine likes it really bland though. He's used to milk, which is pretty bland itself, so I can understand it.

Fishandjam · 15/02/2013 09:41

Alibaba, my DS was weaned onto mush (not tasteless, but nevertheless). He now at age 3 eats "adult" things olives, chorizo, Stilton and capers. But at age 2 he was fussy as you like. I suspect it has more to do with the fact that many 2 year olds ARE fussy - evolution giving them a healthy caution about unfamiliar (possibly poisonous) foods, perhaps? But maybe you disagree.

JugsMcGee · 15/02/2013 09:57

Fishandjam I think it's a normal phase isn't it? DS has had mostly our meals but at nearly 2 he has days/weeks where he won't eat.

Alibabaandthe40nappies · 15/02/2013 10:06

Fish - yes fussiness is totally normal, but if you've introduced a range of flavours early on, in whatever format, then at least they are started on the right path.

dash - do you really just feed him jars? Why not mash up some of your food for him so that he can eat something that tastes real? Jars taste so artificial, and they are all really sweet, even the savoury ones.

We have never used a lot of salt in cooking, it isn't necessary if you have good quality ingredients. And there is nothing wrong with spices, heaven forbid that babies should taste something!

TwelveLeggedWalk · 15/02/2013 10:53

YANBU. I get quite ragey when people say 'Oh just eat with them, and they'll have what you're having surely?'

Er. No.

I have twins, so it's not down to superior/inferior parenting, they're just different. If DD wakes for lunch before DS it's a joy, I can pop her in the high chair, chat to her, make my own lunch and share it with her. No drama.

If I'm trying to feed DS at the same time he screams the minute he's in the chair and not being given exactly what he wants at that particular moment. He won't eat egg (except eggy bread), pasta (except Ellas' toddler meals), most meat (ditto), most veg. Last week he went off fruit entirely. Occasionally bread, cheese, ricecakes, or any other safe food will be violently and suddenly rejected for no discernable reason.

We went out for lunch twice last weekend and he spent the first one pulling chicken out of his mouth and throwing it at the one vegetarian on the table, and the second he threw a spoon so hard it knocked over a full glass of water and soaked me and half the food.

Also, I don't want to eat my dinner at 5.00 pm, DH doesn't get home till 6.30 at the earliest. I like my food seasoned. Last night we had fillet steak, and I'm not wasting htat on a meat refuser. Tonight we're having carbonara, with salty bacon, pecorino, and semi-cooked eggs, they're not having that either!

People who just yabber on about how their child can catch, kill, gut and pluck eat a whole chicken at 7 months make me want to swear extensively.

Fillyjonk75 · 15/02/2013 11:10

YABU. DD1 had a lot more jars as I wasn't as confident with cooking then, or thinking up ideas that could be pureed/mashed down for her. With DD2 I used to give her a few jars when we were out and about, but one time she got quite ill (spag bol sick all over the car - ugh) and just decided herself at 8/9 months that she wasn't going to touch another jar and only liked my cooking. So that was it, she had to have what we were having all the time.

MiaowTheCat · 15/02/2013 13:39

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Oblomov · 15/02/2013 13:49

Same as FolkGirl:
"Sometimes it's just true.

Mine did eat whatever we ate. And still do.

Why is that smug? It's just a fact. "

I have now resorted to complainig that because my kids eat literally everything, and are permanently ravenous, that they are costing me a fortune and eating me out of house and home.
Does that bother you aswell?

And I am smug. well not actually. Its just that thjey are just little blighters, who do so much wrong, are a pain in so many areas, food is the one area I can boast about. >

BarnYardCow · 15/02/2013 14:02

Dd1 fussy as anything, Ds1 refused all fresh homemade baby foods, Ds2 ate pretty much anything if it was on daddy's plate, Dd2 will eat anything , if she wants to eat it, even wants frozen green beans from the freezer.They all eat what we eat, as we all have the same meal, unless it is eat what you want night, or they are ill.Generally, the last two are less fussy, as there wasn't time to hover over them as the first two!

nickelbabe · 15/02/2013 14:09

DD eats basically what we eat.
but she also eats more frequently than we do, so she also eats some of her own stuff.

so,to that end, we have lots of things that are made just for her.
muffins are made and frozen and we don't eat those (well, unless i'm starving!)

nickelbabe · 15/02/2013 14:23

having now read some other posts

dd doesn't sleep at all ever.
ever
we're just eating early lunch now.
I had a croissant because DD hasn't been persuaded to try them yet, she's eating a muffin (cheese and sweetcorn). we've both shared a kiwi and a stick of applewood smoked cheese.

i'm glad that i've insisted she's veggie, because she keeps feeding me.

fragola · 15/02/2013 14:27

YABU. My kids always have. Am I meant to make something up when someone asks in case I seem "smug"?!

AmberSocks · 15/02/2013 14:36

my kids eat what we eat although they obviously have their likes and dislikes.they all sleep well too,but they are a bit feral. :-)

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