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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

Idiots at the school gates

63 replies

molly29 · 06/02/2013 11:46

I need this rant, I teach my child to be polite and kind and thoughtful, then you go to the school gates and some of the mums are so rude! What does a smile and hello cost, there is always the mum with out of control child that you here her screams at them everyday, all the time the child ignores her empty threats and is clearly used to being balled at, she walks in with a face like a slapped behind and looks at you like you are something on the bottom of her shoe. Then there is a mum who facebook friended me, but will stand at next me and pretand i'm not there(needless to say i did not accept her request!), then the mum who does not speak to any mums who did not invite her daughter to their partys! Then the mum who will not talk unless you drive a posh landrover and where labels and plaster make up on to step out the door.
I know not all mums are like this, but is it just my daughters school? i'm not surprised the kids are rude, one telling me to get out of the way and another openly telling my daughter she has an old bike and showing off her new one whilst laughing at my daughter, the whole time not once did they pull them up on how rude they were! What hope is there really!

OP posts:

Eskino · 08/02/2013 17:34

It's got to be done. Until they're old enough to take and return themselves from school, you have to be at the school gate morning and evening. Try not to turn it into a social occasion if it isn't what you're about.

I am the Mum standing by herself, just watching for her son to come out the door.

LynetteScavo · 08/02/2013 17:39

I thought all schools were like this...then I changed schools and found that at some schools all the mums are nice.

That threw me.

I now have nothing bad to post about the school gates on MN.

Alhtough one mum is far too friendly...I find that a bit weird.

Dancergirl · 08/02/2013 17:49

I'm that mum too eskino

Original poster

molly29 · 08/02/2013 17:58

Hey Eskino and Dancergirl, i know the mum like you guys, shes still polite.x
Lynette, like i said before it seems to be my dd's yeargroup,my ds 's is toatally different.Glad you found a school with friendly mums.x

OP posts:

Dawndonna · 08/02/2013 18:05

I meant, I would judge you were you to write to me. Abominable spelling, lack of punctuation, capital letters, and dreadful grammar. But hey, I'm sure you're lovely. In other words, instead of judging, try giving them the benefit of the doubt. Sometimes at the school gate I was so busy in my head working out what was needed at home, that I wouldn't have noticed if Santa had jumped out at me in the middle of July.

hanginginthere1 · 08/02/2013 18:19

That is quite a rude reply, Dawndonna. Maybe we should give you the benefit of the doubt!

Dawndonna · 08/02/2013 18:23

Somewhat unusually for me, hanging yes it is. I have three children with ASDs and was constantly judged at the school gates, frequently on the internet. We were in fact judged to such an extent that we were hounded out of the village in which we were living at the time. Give a damn? No.

Original poster

molly29 · 08/02/2013 18:32

ok dawndonna, well you've hounded me out of the conversation, you didn't like being judged, i'm dyslexic, so you learnt alot from that didn't you!
I won't be replying anyone thanks, thanks for the kind replys.i'm grateful.x

OP posts:

hanginginthere1 · 08/02/2013 18:38

Molly,
I have been there and got the t shirt. Thankfully, mine are now at High school, but i still get ignored by some from the primary school days. Must admit, I just gave up after a while and did my own thing.
I have also found that jealousy and insecurity often play a major part in these matters. One of my children is a gifted sports person,the other a talented performer. Neither of them, the least bit arrogant, but people try to make out that they are. Added to this my OH works in a high profile sport, albeit in a non high profile role. Some people don't like this. I now shrug my shoulders and move on.

Acinonyx · 08/02/2013 19:34

It's madness to be so upset by playground behaviour. I just don't get the angxt at all. They're just people, warts and all. Some are friends, some are acquaintances. Some are basically strangers. You never know what is going on with people - it's not usually personal - they have their own stuff going on. Maybe I'm lucky with my playground - and maybe I'm lucky that I don't interpret everything as being about me.

TattyDevine · 08/02/2013 20:38

Everyone is nice at my school!
I've made some really good friends, and I organised a big night out at Xmas, it was fun
We have "types" - horsey ones, busy working ones, non horsey non working ones, nutters (just me) etc but we all say hi and get along...maybe organise a night out to break the ice?

scottishmummy · 08/02/2013 20:41

it's life,the school gate wags and cows
they excel at withering looks and usually in the pta
probably because they have sweet fa else to worry about

redlac · 08/02/2013 20:55

You are being a wee bit judge. Most of the time I will smile and chat to anyone in the playground however some days with lack of sleep, work stress etc I just can't be arsed so put DD in her line and stand by myself (probably with a crabbit expression on my face).

Don't take it to personally - they will be rude cows to everyone in their life not just in the playground

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