AIBU to think that excessive watching of tv has a detrimental effect on a toddler's behaviour?

[BigGiantCowWithAKnockKnockTail]

Because I'm about to tell XH that he'd be hard pushed to find a mother of a toddler who would dispute that. Thought I'd better check first

In general I am pretty relaxed about tv- god knows when DD2 was a newborn and DD1 was a toddler we had Cbeebies on pretty much nonstop- DD1 is now a bright as a button 5yo and prolonged exposure to Mr Maker age 2 has in no way had a detrimental effect on her (except for a slight obsession with glitter and egg boxes
...) The kids know they can watch tv when they like and as a result it isn't an issue, they don't watch aimlessly, just the programmes they like, and turn it off when they have had enough.

However I do agree that your ex was an arse to bring her home at 9.30 because he didn't want to deal with her, and that going between two different households with very different rules is probably unsettling for her.

I think it sounds more like your XP is a twit than it's the TV that is at fault.

We often have Cbeebies / CBBC on all day saturday and sunday. The kids don't sit down all that time, what they watch inspires them to make and play. A lot of the time it's ignored, but as far as background noise goes it's better than most. We are always interacting as it's open plan so I'm forced to talk to the little pests all the time

My 23 month old has watched tv from a very early age (thanks to baby tv) and a cbeebies fan since.

She is a great talker, has fantastic imagination and loves having family time at bedtime hour and watching night garden together.

Therefore yabu

I'm with Numerical and PenelopePipPop on this.
You seem to be looking for ways to put the boot into your ex, OP. Finding fault isn't going to help good relations with your DD's dad. It's not on that he brought her back to you instead of keeping her there, but giving him a lecture about how shit he is as a dad is just going to rattle everyone, most especially your DD. Pick your battles.
You cannot control what her dad chooses to do with her when he has her, you have to try to relax about it. Really hard, I know, but do try. If you're concerned, next time pack some plydough, puzzles or books and suggest to your ex that he might want to do those activities with her.

FWIW, I think any more than about an hour a day of TV is too much for kids under 4.

Penelope and Kiwi I refer you to my 3rd comment on page 1. I honestly thought it would be a general thing that toddlers would react badly when exposed to more tv than normal. I conceded that it must be child-specific. I'm not bloody lecturing him about how shit he is, I'm trying to explain to him why DD probably acted up at bedtime and was wanting to know if it was a general thing about toddlers or not.

And do you honestly think I don't send her with toys and suggestions?

It's amazing how much is read into people's lives as a result of just a couple of posts.

How does anyone get an under 5 to watch more than half an hour of TV?
My dgc love their favourite shows but the younger one,who is nearly 4, would much rather be playing or looking at books after a couple of cbeebies things or a couple of episodes of Postmaan Pat.
Oddly the only episodic thing he will watch through is a 3 episode Peter Rabbit dvd.

Ah well, if I've got the wrong end of the stick I'm sorry. Good luck.

Thanks kiwi

I'm sorry - I misinterpreted your post then.

FWIW I didn't for a second think you were lecturing your ex on how shit he is. Just that while we all like to know what the 'average' child needs as our reference point it is actually only useful when we do not know what our child needs. It is not useful when we already know what our child needs. In other words if you already know why ask? I was suggesting that in your situation you should feel more confident about how you were handling things rather than feel the need to bolster your argument with extra stuff.

I'm going to be honest here and admit I haven't read all of the thread but...how do you know she watched tv excessively? My husband came home from work the other day and asked our two year old what we had done that day-all she said was 'I watch tele, I watch Peppa Pig' she had seen one episode before getting in the bath, but to her that's all she had done! Small children are. It always reliable sources of information!

My dear friend's son seems to be suffering from too much tv. His social skills and language are behind and she's letting him spend literally ALL day in front of the tv.

He eats there too.

She is intelligent and educated. I can't think why she's doing it.

op, I'm sure watching excessive amounts of tv isn't the best thing. but do you think it could be your exes parenting in general that's the problem rather than the tv ? or the disruption to her routine ?

I'm curious as to what the official line is from the health community in the UK. I'm an ex-pat (in the US) and the AAP strongly advises against TV for children under two. Both paediatricians we see, in addition to asking questions about diet, how many words etc. for our eighteen-month-old, ask how much TV he watches. Obviously plenty of people don't follow the advice, but the message is pushed quite a bit here.

MrsMushroom I expect she's doing it because it's easy. Young children can be a P.I.A. Tv keeps them quiet. Of course you know this: your friend is taking the easy road.