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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To be a bit shocked about a friend giving her six month old cake?

166 replies

ElphabaTheGreen · 26/01/2013 19:05

At lunch today, a friend ordered a piece of Victoria sponge for pudding, sliced off a fair chunk (jam, buttercream and all) and fed it to her six month old, after this baby had had some kind of veggie mush, fruit purée, a petit filou and a rusk.

I have an 8mo and all this (esp cake) strikes me as sugar overload or AIBU and would other people do this?

(I said nothing to friend, by the way, and I'm reasonably sure my face remained neutrally arranged...just wondering if I'm being PFB about what I give DS.)

OP posts:
Pobblewhohasnotoes · 26/01/2013 20:16

Elphaba, it really irritates me when people use the 'well so and so did it so it must be ok' arguement. Bollocks.

There are plenty of good reasons why baby rice shouldn't be put in a bottle. Research and guidelines are there for good reasons, not for fun.

My Mum used to put me in a carry cot in the back seat of the car, doesn't mean I'd do the same.

Original poster
ElphabaTheGreen · 26/01/2013 20:16

I agree about not completely withholding treats for older children Alibaba but would you still apply that to a six month old?

OP posts:
Callmedoe · 26/01/2013 20:17

By the way HoneyDragon. When I said I didn't want to see you on the Cake thread I didn't mean this one I meant a far superior thread about cake and birds.

piprabbit · 26/01/2013 20:18

As the OP has given no indication at all of the portion sizes for the mash and puree, whether the child licked the yoghurt pot clean, or how much of the rusk was dropped on the floor, it is very hard to tell if it was too much food.

I think it is nice to offer children a small share of more 'adult' foods once in a while. There is nothing more annoying than an adult who stuffs their face with lovely food while wailing that it is 'too rich for the children'.

mrsjay · 26/01/2013 20:18

how do you sterilise food just HOW the poster who said that really you think outside food is too filthy for babies Confused

Callmedoe · 26/01/2013 20:19

Also I've reported the whole sponge/sandwich issue to Nick and Kate.

Florin · 26/01/2013 20:19

No problem with cake. My 7 month old has has cake a couple of times however probably wouldn't give all that sugar in one hit. Everyone does judge about food some how it seems to be one of the most controversial parts of baby rearing! We are blw and my Mum finds it so strange that in reason he has everything we have once had a full blown row about it and my sister screamed at me that i was purposely choking my child (he has never choked and hasn't even gagged in front of her). Our ds has had all sorts scallops, clams, calamari, game, Camembert, goats cheese, olives (cut and flattened) pate etc loved it all but only in small amounts to be wary of salt levels. However some people are quite surprised how much he puts away in a normal meal, but he does love his food and he is feeding himself rather than us shoving it down his throat!

sunshine401 · 26/01/2013 20:20

I'd have a word or ring NSPCC - her baby is clearly going to get fat. How poor exactly are they? Does your friend have ASBO? Shock

Not read the whole thread but I am REALLY hoping that was meant to be funny right?

chickenyummychicken · 26/01/2013 20:24

i was totally pfb with my first
wouldn't have a problem now at all with it.

ChoudeBruxelles · 26/01/2013 20:28

why can't they have strawberries?

I'm surprised DS has made it to the ripe old age of nearly 7 tbh they way some people on this thread are about food. I gave him yoghurt's yesterday that were 2 days out of date (I did taste them first myself to make sure they tasted ok first though)

GiveMeSomeSpace · 26/01/2013 20:28

OP back to your original post. Yes it is a bit PFB.

We were with our first. By no4 we just went with the flow - I wish we had done the same with all of them. I feel bad about no1 now! Didn't make a jot of difference. All very active, all eat the same meals. No fussy eaters. No sweet toothes.

Just wish we had been more relaxed with no1.

Original poster
ElphabaTheGreen · 26/01/2013 20:29

piprabbit Baby was fed several spoons each of veggie mush and fruit, half the rusk and all of the Petit Filous. Was also fed piece of quiche crust. Piece of raw red pepper was attempted, but when she started to gag a little bit, friend reached into her mouth (while I sat on my hands and avoided quoting first aid advice at her) and scooped it out. Cake was fed to baby after this. Baby didn't feed herself anything - it was all put into her mouth.

Last time I saw baby she was just five months old and friend put the leg of a gingerbread man into her mouth and let her try and eat it. I had made gingerbread man and can confirm it was pretty heavy on dark muscovado and golden syrup (not to mention wheat flour...for a just-five-month-old...am I really being too judgey pants here??)

OP posts:
WorraLiberty · 26/01/2013 20:32

You're quite easily shocked aren't you?

And to answer your question, yes you're being very judgey.

Good job you're a much better parent...enjoy!

amazingmumof6 · 26/01/2013 20:33

Elpaba - this is a wasps' nest you disturbed here!Grin you and I are right and all the ones who agree with us

problem solved Grin

HoneyDragon · 26/01/2013 20:39

Not agreeing on an aspect of child rearing is not agreeing not "defensive". There is no shame in giving a child cake unless its Battenburg

CallmeDoe, as I said on the other thread. I could be there already and you just don't know.

sunflowersfollowthesun · 26/01/2013 20:40

Guidelines for weaning was 12 weeks or 12LB when my 3 were babies. (Youngest is 14, so not that long ago)
To my mind you need to trust yourself about weaning the way you trust your instincts that they're poorly. They all started weaning at different times, but it was pretty obvious that they were ready.
I think its a shame that mums feel they have to follow the rules to the letter or they're doing it wrong.

AmberSocks · 26/01/2013 20:47

my youngest is 16 weeks so im guessing he willbe given chocolate and cake etc earlier than the others were as my others are 3 4 and 5,they have puddings most nights and chocolate or biscuits wheenever they ask for them which is once a week at most.

6 months seems a bit young,i never started blw til about 6 or even 7 months,so cake wouldnt come along til they were more like 12-18 months,my eldest never had stuff like that til he was 3.

amazingmumof6 · 26/01/2013 20:48

well I'm just sorry for the baby, another unhealthy person in the making.

hope her mum is proud of herself

Original poster
ElphabaTheGreen · 26/01/2013 20:50

Worra Yes, I'm dreadfully easily shocked, I'll admit. I actually keep my DS in a hermetically sealed chamber and feed him calorie-dense sterile food. Definitely no cake.

What's wrong with Battenburg? It has almonds and pink food colouring in it. Practically makes it a vegetable in my book.

OP posts:
achillea · 26/01/2013 20:53

If we are advised to sterilise bottles until 12 months how can we put unsterilised food into a baby's mouth before then

It's not the diet that is the concern, it's the bacteria that are dangerous to babies that are putting the child at risk. Perhaps a quick reminder to your friend would help with this. It's not about being judgey pants it's about health and safety. Apart from the choking element of course, which you are aware of.

Original poster
ElphabaTheGreen · 26/01/2013 20:54

OK. I'll remind her to boil the cake for five minutes next time Hmm

OP posts:
Fakebook · 26/01/2013 20:58

So what if she reached into the mouth with her hand to retrieve the pepper? Was she supposed to suck it out with her mouth? Or put a fishing line in there? You do know that at 6 months you can start giving finger foods to get the baby used to eating? The gag reflex helps to teach the baby to swallow small pieces of food.

Odd odd person.

shesariver · 26/01/2013 20:58

achillea you are talking complete bollocks about sterile food. [bhmm]

BartletForTeamGB · 26/01/2013 21:00

amazingmum's list is almost entirely bonkers.

Babies are allowed salt, just very small amounts. The only things they definitely shouldn't have are whole nuts & honey.

shesariver · 26/01/2013 21:00

[bhmm]

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