I don't buy/use second hand, ie clothes, electricals, toys, shoes, etc (New to MN)

[HowTerriblyEngliscOfMe]

Nor have I ever. Not as a child, not as a teenager, not as an adult and now, not as a parent. If you have the money to not to need to go second hand for things, why are others so disgusted at the concept that you don't? I understand why people do it even when they don't need to, and I know there are plenty of people who don't have any other choice, but why can't people just leave me to it? It's my family, my home and my decision.

It's my mil who gets the most distressed about it. She will go on at me about it every chance she gets and I really don't understand what her problem is. I don't NEED to save that extra few hundred pounds, I don't NEED to buy toys and clothes in charity shops, I don't NEED to buy my electricals from eBay, so what is her problem?

When we started collecting things in preparation of our first child's birth, she was so weirdly mortified that dp and I were going out buying new nursery furniture and clothes, car seat, soft toys etc. She would utterly panic when we would mention that we were researching cots or buggies.

"But this person had a baby last year, you could have theirs! I'm sure they wouldn't mind! Let me get you their number..."

It got worse when dd was born she would come and thrust other peoples old baby clothes at me and continue to suggested people who had things they could give us, or come bringing baby toys from charity shops. Eventually I got so frustrated with it, I just told her outright to stop, quite forcefully actually. But it just continued a few years later when ds was born and it still continues today.

Do people really think IABU? Why? Anyone else out there like me?

I don't need to buy stuff in charity shops either. But I do, because I can buy so many things for the price of 1 item in a new shop. I've always bought cars second-hand, as you lose several thousand pounds as soon as you drive off the forecourt - why WOULD anyone want to do that? Beats me. I don't understand people who have an issue with second-hand stuff, tbh I think it's ridiculous. Do you always buy a brand new house OP?

For the last 30 years, from being the youngest of five children, to my mother being widowed and left to provide for us, to being a penniless student, to building up my own business, never have I been able to have new stuff. EVERY single bit of furniture in my front room has come from neighbours, skips, the dump ebay or charity shops.

Fuck make do and mend. I want a wardrobe that fits the space intended so I can actually get in the room, jumpers without weird bobbles on them and pans that are actually the right size for what I want to cook. And now I can actually afford to I've decided I'm going to buy exactly what I need.

So OP you are definitely NBU! And to those rich buggers who buy new and donate the decent stuff to the charity shop, thank you!

For the last 30 years, from being the youngest of five children, to my mother being widowed and left to provide for us, to being a penniless student, to building up my own business, never have I been able to have new stuff. EVERY single bit of furniture in my front room has come from neighbours, skips, the dump ebay or charity shops.

Fuck make do and mend. I want a wardrobe that fits the space intended so I can actually get in the room, jumpers without weird bobbles on them and pans that are actually the right size for what I want to cook. And now I can actually afford to I've decided I'm going to buy exactly what I need.

So OP you are definitely NBU! And to those rich buggers who buy new and donate the decent stuff to the charity shop, thank you!

Op factually said,she didn't need to watch the pennies as reason she doesn't shop 2nd hand
now that's been regurgitated as she's boasty,and vulgar to suit how people want to post
her mil is banging on,imposing her values and op got frustrated.understandably

I think its a personal choice. I buy some things second hand, but they will most likely be rare, vintage one offs or high end designer things. I bought both secondhand and brand new when i was expecting my last child. At that time i was in a position to buy brand new, but i'm now on a low income so i'm careful with my money. For myself, fortunately when my life was good and i wasn't a single parent(although i was.....married but single) we could afford to buy really expensive things. I'm fortunate that i still have the wardrobe that i had 5 years ago and as they're classic pieces, i don't need to buy new clothes, but for the children i do, so i save or i go the 2nd hand route. Its nothing to be ashamed of. 2nd hand can yield some fantastic pieces, if you know what you're looking for or where to find it!

Good for you am not sure why you are so bothered its your choice. I love a bargain and hate to feel fleaced.

I do tend to think FOOL when someone reports how much they have paid for something brand new.

Maybe mil is trying to be helpful and worried that her son and dil are spending lots of money, who knows. My gran lived through hard times and remained frugal and concerned about money all her life. The ops mil is visiting and bringing the children presents. So she doesnt have old swords and a land rover, the op is lucky her dh isnt saying not more ruddy maps from your dear grandfather.

Swords...I'm with fakebook and aderynlas on this one...wtf?

bollocks is deriding people for spending their own money on new rather than 2nd hand
buying new is a choice one makes on finances.,and yes in most cases I want new
my baby monitor,it's not in landfill, it and the rest of baby stuff went to my hv

Agree with aquashiv (and 100s more posters ) I just don't understand why people are so sniffy about second hand stuff. My DS & DBIL are continually moaning about how 'hard up' they are, but they would never, ever dream of buying clothes from ebay/charity shop or jumble sale. Their home is a shrine to consumerism. My DS actually commented that she had 'no idea' how I could be a SAHM when she and her DH had to go out to work (nb: I know their income is far higher than ours - they are complaining about losing CB - we won't) - but if they just stopped buying everythiing brand new they could save a fortune.

The only benefit is that they do occasionally 'hand down' stuff to my DC .

SM I think what's bothered people isn't the OP not wanting to buy second hand, its the seeming horror of being given it by others.

Though the OP actually seems pretty reasonable about it.

Unlike some of the other posters on here who are being decidedly odd about not only being given second hand things (being offended?! really?!) but about others liking buying second hand. That is bizarre.

YABU. I was like dreamofwhitehorses when I got my first home as a single parent, filled it up with furniture from secondhand shops and donations from friends/family, plus I had lots of donated baby items and clothes. They were fine, but they were never just right for the space or function or what I'd have picked out. I used to try to 'do them up' by adding a stain/varnish and it always looked a bit amateur and wrong. And any secondhand electric stuff had a short life as it would already have been out of warranty and towards the end of its life by the time it got to me.

I'm moving into a new home with my new partner and it's utterly lovely to be able to browse furniture catalogues and websites, draw little diagrams of our rooms and work out what is going to fit, instead of fitting what we happen to find or get given.

Finances aren't an issue at all now (but space is) and it's a luxury that I really appreciate - though tbh with online shopping we've been able to find some real bargains, and with the convenience of free delivery instead of doing ebay pickups. Electricals I can rely on, furniture without dents or bits missing, clothes without bobbles or missing accessories. My mum is really thrifty though and keeps trying to give me bits of her old furniture (she is downsizing) but it would fit really awkwardly in our home.

I buy new because I want to,because I can.whether or not I can recycle
ability to recycle item doesn't influence that inital decision to buy.
spending generates revenue,maintains manufacture and fuels demand

Oh dear. The op has not come back. Though of course she could just have things to do.

If she has decided not to post on here again, I think she may have learnt that it may be better for her to see how MN sort of works first.
And a name change means you can start again if you want to.

I'm with you OP. I don't look down on people who choose to buy second hand things but I choose not to. I would rather have 1-2 new items of clothing than 10 second hand things. I work hard for my money, it's how I choose to spend it and I won't be made to feel embarrassed about it.

I buy what I want,at price I'm willing to pay,the country of origin is immaterial
as do most of us in fact. iPad is the item wanted at price I can afford.I bought it
spending drives economy, creates demands,maintains retail and jobs. hmv and blockbuster folded with inadequate spending as contributory reason

YANBU to want all new stuff its a matter of personal choice.

Speaking personally its not a choice I'd make especially for children's clothes. DS is currently wearing all second hand stuff except for his socks and obviously his nappy (disposable). It looks like new and will be passed on again when he's finished with it. I see no point on wasting money and resources on clothes he'll be grown out of in 2-3 months time if not sooner

It was my new years resolution not to buy anything new if i could get it 2nd hand.

I am doing it from a resources perspective. have you seen how much plastic crap ends up in landfill?

You sound very lucky and i hope your income never changes. God forbid you have to buy a perfectly good used toy with all its parts yet minus the extra packaging.

retailer preorders popular item eg bugaboo, iPad.these future orders are demand which=profit
if there no demand for item it doesn't sell,no profit,no repeat order

If I could afford it,I would always buy new.But I'm skint so I can't.