Would you judge us as parents if your child got a crap birthday present at a party?

[M0naLisa]

Me and DH are skint. Our two boys have a party invitation each for Sunday. Only handed out on Monday this week.
6yr old Is going to a day out with birthday boys parents on the morning with other kids in ds class.
4yr old is going to a local scout hut in the afternoon

We are skint. Would you judge us as parents if we gave a box of Maltesers as presents?

It's all we can afford at the moment. I just don't want the parents thinking were cheap skates :-(

[gimmecakeandcandy]

No I would not judge you at all. But - I would be a bit at some of my friends who I know are extremely well off if they brought that but not someone who I know is struggling, not at all. I would be more happy with your gift as you have really thought about what you can afford than a friend who earns a shit load but spends a couple of quid.

[Labootin]

Match attax cards are a v good idea
Ditto maltesers

LOVE the daffodils mentioned

homemade cards are fab.. They get put at the front

Am choking slightly at Venus Risings post .. How very very sad ...

[M0naLisa]

Also the party on Sunday is at a skate park with scooters at local complex. Transport has been provided as well as food.

[Catchingmockingbirds]

I'm in the same position as you OP. DS has been invited to a party on Sunday and we only got the invitation on Tuesday. DP lost his job in November and has only just started a new one today so we're literally got about £70 to do us until the end of the month. I was going to get something cheap but was worried about what the parents would think as they've obviously spent a bit on the party.

[gimmecakeandcandy]

Go and enjoy x

[M0naLisa]

We have not much over £25 to last till Sunday :-(.

[HazeltheMcWitch]

ARF at Venus' reply. There's always one, isn't there...
Venus, did you apply same logic to your wedding (if you have one? Not judging btw on married vs. not married.)
Judging quite a bit on the grabby behaviour though!

[Labootin]

Dd once got a handwritten and decorated (by the child) recipe card for fairy cakes complete with measured out (in zipped sandwich bags) flour and sugar and six cake cases.

must have cost less than a pound and was a really lovely gift

[MrsMelons]

Wow I am shocked that any parents would request a voucher from the invited children - how rude! Its not a bloody wedding list FFS!

I have also experienced being 2 presents/cards short. I would definitely NOT expect presents at all but a card is a must if people have actually paid for your child to attend their party.

Some chocolate as a present is definitely NU and I would be so upset if someone didn't come because they felt they HAD to buy something. A homemade card would be lovely and much appreciated by my DCs for sure, I am not sure what sort of lessons your DCs are learning Venus.

As fiesty as I can on MN be I have never really critisised peoples parenting choices as believe each to their own but I am actually shocked at your attitude Venus.

[WynkenBlynkenandNod]

Venus, I spent about £20 a head on DD's birthday and consider the box of chocolates a lovely present. I'd have been totally happy if there wasn't a present. I chose to spend the money and don't feel there should be a pay off for doing so, why on earth would I?

I'm still quite gutted that the girl's Mum asked me if it was alright to pick her up from where they lived after I wrote on the invite I happily would as I think it means she's found some people weren't alright about it.

[DizzyHoneyBee]

My DS got a box of maltesers when it was his birthday party, he was delighted with them and I didn't think anything of it - I know the parent concerned has very little money. Personally I would go to the pound shop for cheap felt tips and a colouring book but that's just me. .

[Gumby]

If you pm me your address I'll send you something to give

[M0naLisa]

I'm just hoping the snow isn't too bad on Sunday as ill be fretting over him getting home safely as they are going on the motorway

[M0naLisa]

Gumby thank you but it's ok.
The party is on Sunday I'm going to nip out after school and get presents sorted :-)

[JuliaScurr]

pound shop

[theodorakisses]

No way, I find the show offy presents a bit sad to be honest. My friend was in the same situation and apologised and asked if they could still come. That made me sad. They get too many presents anyway, next year I am going to say "just bring yourselves"

[Catsdontcare]

Ds1 got a bag of pick and mix from a friend for his party I've never seen him so happy!

He also gets very excited by pound coins taped to Xmas and birthday cards.

I wouldn't give it a second thought.

[TheVermiciousKnid]

Venus, what a depressing post. :(

YANBU, M0naLisa. I hope your children enjoy the parties. :)

[LovesBeingWokenEveryNight]

What about some old style it's the thought that counts.

[drjohnsonscat]

I think it would be a good present and I would def not judge. I think everyone spends too much on presents for friends. One family who came to DD's party asked what she would like and I said maybe a Rainbow Fairies book, thinking it was easy and not toooo much money. They bought her a set of seven. I was mortified in case they thought I meant please buy the whole set but also a bit horrified at the cost for them - I know they are not well off.

[M0naLisa]

Actually I have upstairs in the cupboard 2 presents that are unwrapped but unopened from Christmas 2011.

Would I be even more unreasonable to give those

[firawla]

wouldnt judge that, my kids would be happy with malteasers! most kids like chocolate so its not really a "crap" present is it. its not inappropriate or anythign

[Flobbadobs]

Venus can't be serious. Surely no one expects a present equal in value to the cost of each child's pace at the party? How depressing..

[ChiefOwl]

I am at Venus. I have parties for my children so they can celebrate with their friends. Whether the party is £1 a head or £100 a head that's my choice and does not dictate how expensive the present should be... And as for asking for vouchers, I woud be far more judges about that !

My dc would be happy with a box of malteasers :) and we always do homemade cards. I would hate for any child not to be able to come to a party as they felt that had to bring a present, a card is fine x

[Flobbadobs]

Just seen your last post, if they're suitable then wrap them up! [mile]