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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to wonder why some women don't wear make-up

608 replies

MeganCherry · 11/01/2013 16:00

I'm sure I will get flamed for this but -

I don't mean trowel it on every morning, 3 lots of foundations, eyeshadow, eyeliner etc.

I have quite good skin, so on a usual day I'll wear - mascara and a lipstick/glass. On a bad day I'll probably wear concealer too.

I think make up is about enhancing your features and making the best of them. Me after a sleepless night I look like a zombie, add some concealer and I look like a human being again.

I like to wear make up for me and not to impress my husband or friends or strangers. I just know that I look better when I'm wearing it.

OP posts:
cheeseandpineapple · 13/01/2013 01:04

Sorry to make you shudder skiinggargener!

I'd love to get my hair straighteners on one of my friends too. Hope that doesn't make you shudder too!

cheeseandpineapple · 13/01/2013 01:06

Sorry, I meant skiinggardener

cheeseandpineapple · 13/01/2013 01:10

seeker, if men looked entirely themselves, there would be a hell of a lot of bearded men around. As it happens, last time I looked, beards are in the minority.

They don't look entirely themselves, it's another matter of convention.

aufaniae · 13/01/2013 01:16

Cheese I think you'll find that there would also be a surprising number of women with beards around too if no one did anything about their appearance at all!

Removing hair on your chin isn't the quite the same thing as applying makeup IMO.

Aspiemum2 · 13/01/2013 01:17

I look just as shit with make up as without so the extra pillow time wins for me!

Dh says he prefers me without make up, presume he's being honest and my ex's have said the same. It occurs to me that my application method may be the issue.......

My dc's think I look gorgeous no matter what daft buggers

Campari · 13/01/2013 01:31

I only wear makeup when I'm going out all dolled up for a party or dinner. Its a treat for me, and wouldn't feel so special if I put it on everyday. I see cosmetics as luxuries, especially as they're so expensive.

garlicbollocks · 13/01/2013 03:05

It's really odd to see the passionate defences of makeup here, coupled with assumptions that those of us who go Hmm are actually against it, and/or don't know how to put it on.

I own tons of the stuff. I'm good at putting it on, I even know how to do zillions of different looks. This is because it's fun to do sometimes. It's like playing ... at being somebody else; looking like a different kind of person. Which is the precise reason I don't wear it at business meetings.

Either things are going backwards very fast for women (well, I know they are!) or too many of you are being bossed around by outdated, sexist information. That claptrap about getting the business or the raise if you're sporting a face full went out of date in the 1990s. Not coincidentally, this is also when women with serious clout stopped wearing slap for work.

Do I judge women wearing makeup? Only if they've done it really badly Wink
I certainly don't judge them as harshly as some of you are judging us!

garlicbollocks · 13/01/2013 03:06

motherinferior, make sure your sunscreen doesn't contain un-buffered nanoparticles.

twoyearsandcounting · 13/01/2013 08:47

I didn't wear a scrap of makeup til I was 23. I just never got into the habit. Then I decided to, it's all about choices. I'm happy with my choice to wear it but I was equally happy with my choice not to wear it.

carmenelectra · 13/01/2013 08:48

ria. Think you know what feminine and I mean.

Better as in more grromed, even skin tone, youthful and so on.
Those who try and make this into something else, ie motloth who said it WAS a political/feminist issue have too much time on their hands. Everying on mumsnet is turned into a political or feminist issue! Do these posters scour the net looking articles and papers do back up their theories? Jesus.

I have no agenda. I like spending time on my image, love it. Love make up and beauty products. And so do the vast majority of people if the make up industry is anything to go by. Do tell me about marketing or the media. Telling us we have to a certain way. I don't care. I like looking good.

So non make up wearers what do you do when you go out for dinner or a party. Do you wear party frocks, shave your legs put mascara on even.

Good for all of you who are comfortable that you look great without make up. No eye shadows, perfect even skintone, not washed out or pale, eyelashes that frame you eyes nicely. I suppose you don't care if you have or not? Its better to walk out looking knackered than lose your argument.

Like I said a while ago the people who say they don't need make up are the very ones who do!

Also I agree with the poster who would like to 'make up' certain peoples faces. Not because they have anything wrong with them, just to to glam them up a bit. In all honesty though, there are very few people who wear no make up ever at all.

chibi · 13/01/2013 08:59

no eye shadows, perfect even skintone, not washed out or pale, eyelashes that frame you eyes nicely

i have dark hair and olive skin- it never looks pale or washed out, and my eyelashes are thick, long, and dark.

it is a real struggle for you, isn't it to accept that even by your standards, that there are some people who don't need makeup (and i use need very cautiously, as obviously no one does), and that no one owes anyone a made up face.

i am not letting anyone down by not wearing makeup. it really is one of least important things about me, and were i to start it would not add one iota of benefit or pleasure to my life, and i could give two farts in a high wind about how much better it would be for anyone else if i did.

it is not something for you to bemoan or ponder or anything else, anymore than it is for someone to bemoan or ponder that some people are so deliciously vapid and devoid of substance that they are incapable of understanding that other people have different priorities to them,and that that is okay.

sheesh.

Crawling · 13/01/2013 09:14

'not washed out or pale' I have very pale skin I still don't wear make up and while tanned is popular here I've been complemented on how lovely and pale my skin is by for foreign people beauty is in the eye of the beholder.

RubyGates · 13/01/2013 09:14

"Good for all of you who are comfortable that you look great without make up. No eye shadows, perfect even skintone, not washed out or pale, eyelashes that frame you eyes nicely. I suppose you don't care if you have or not? Its better to walk out looking knackered than lose your argument."

Actually, I have a blotchy skin tone, unplucked eyebrows and a white-head problem. And you know what, if I don't care I really don't understand why you do.

I wear what I'm comfortable in, things that make me feel comfortable with myself, and that project my personality. The things I wear are more or less formal depending on the situation.

As a re-encator and costumier I'm well aware of the constructs of fashion the issues surrounding our appearance.

I hang out with men who wear a lot more make-up and hair product than me, and it doesn't seem to bother them, so why should it bother you?

ledkr · 13/01/2013 09:21

A lot of the criticism being given to us poor painted ladies is that we do it to fit in or please men:society. However a few non wearers have stated one of the reasons they don't wear it is that "dh prefers me without it" or "I look better without it" isn't that an odd parallel?

BigStickBIWI · 13/01/2013 09:21

I'm really Hmm that you assume that because some of us wear no make up that we must look shit without it!

I went out for dinner with DH last night. Dressed up, but with no make up.

And I looked fine.

Yes, I could have enhanced my appearance; I could have altered my appearance. But I chose not to. I was out having a perfectly civilised, relaxed and pleasant evening in an expensive restaurant, with my husband - who wanted to go out to dinner with me.

BigStickBIWI · 13/01/2013 09:22

And to repeat seeker's post:

"Why are men given a free pass to look entirely like themselves, whereas women are deemed to need make up to pass muster? Why do you think that is?"

Psammead · 13/01/2013 09:22

Last time I wore any make up was for my wedding, I think. And that was more out of convention that anything.

I do not care how I look, so long as I am clean, tidy(ish) and appropriately clothed.

Others do care. That's fine too.

BigStickBIWI · 13/01/2013 09:23

Oh and by the way, OP, just to make you shudder even more, I am 53. Get me! Going out without make-up, looking all old.

chibi · 13/01/2013 09:23

i think that was in response to claims that men would fancy us . more if we wore makeup, including our husbands regardless of what they claim

i don't wear makeup for the same reason i don't do ikebana- i just don't fancy it

chibi · 13/01/2013 09:29

you made up ladies- how many of you have learned to speak serbo croatian fluently? it is a beautiful language, and you would be able to read excellent epic poetry in the original format. if you haven' t yet mastered it, why not? it would make journeys in the balkans much more pleasurable for you and others.

when i think of women not bothering to master such a complex and evocative language i fell really Sad

if the above sounds deranged, have a little reflecto on your insistence that women should wear makeup. if anything, learning a language is at least useful

carmenelectra · 13/01/2013 09:29

I too don't 'need' make up. I have olive skin and dark eyebrows and long dark eyelashes. Sometimes I make them look longer with false ones.

Make up is fun to me. Some posters seriously need to lighten up. I have a feeling some wouldn't wear it if their life depended on it just to prove their point.

Agree with ledkr too. 'My dh prefers me without' type of comments. Surely that should be a reason to do the opposite rather than be man pleasers!

chibi · 13/01/2013 09:33

carmen can you do ikebana? can you speak serbocroatian? can you make lace, or play the dulcimer?

sad 4 u hunn Sad Wink

carmenelectra · 13/01/2013 09:34

Actuallyi have learned two languages as an adult, in between applying my slap :).

I wonder how many non make up defenders also don't like pink for girls either?

BigStickBIWI · 13/01/2013 09:35

No-one is saying that you shouldn't enjoy make up. Lots of people have said it's fun. Lots of people have said they use it always/sometimes/occasionally to make themselves look attractive/better/different.

But we don't have to use make up if we don't want to. Some people are quite happy not to use it. Some people simply don't care what they look like without it.

But when we tell you this, you tell people to 'lighten up'?! Grin

Salbertina · 13/01/2013 09:37

Which paper is the Op writing for? Hmm