To think life will get harder with boys

[notnagging]

I have 5. I feel like the odd one out. They are currently playing monopoly with their dad. I asked that they were in bed by 9 in prep for the school run next week. If I say anything now it will look like I'm spoiling their fun. I feel like the older they get the more I'll get left out. I do alot with them & appreciate they're dad being so hands on but I can't help feeling increasingly left out.

[ILoveSaladReallyIDo]

people are bonkers, do some people really think having a teenage girl = loads of mummy-daughter shopping trips and double manicures??? WTF I couldn't bear my mother from about 12yrs to about 24yrs! I actually couldn't bear to even breath the same air as her! Menapause + female teenager hormones does not make for girly chats and bonding!!! Got on much better with my dad as a teenager!

[minouminou]

I've got a somewhat - ahem - gender-fluid boy and a pissy pink girly girl.
The thought of schlepping around girly shops with either of them gives me the shits!
Just join in the Monopoly and stop genderising it! Make it a logistical, logical forward planning thing. "Right, guys, up early tomorrow, let's wrap this up in ten......"

[MrsKeithRichards]

Do get a hetty, I say good morning to her and she doesn't scratch her arse or grunt something about cheerios before turning the news over to power Ben thunder turtles.

[notnagging]

Ilovesalad I never did that with my mum either. We did not get on still don't but I do miss having another female in the house. I probably would hate doing all of that in reality!

[notnagging]

I think I'm getting a bit ott on pink mrskeith. Dh bought me a big pink fluffy dressing gown for Christmas which I love. He commented that I would've put that in the bin a few years ago

[ILikeWhisperingToo]

So will you AND your husband be following through on the early morning tomorrow?

[notnagging]

Yes he is always up early in the mornings & luckily does most of the school runs. They will definitely be going to bed early tmw as he is going out tmw night!

[destinationanywhere]

I think the problem is that the DH just likes the stuff the boys do.

They all enjoy getting wet and muddy and running around. DH finds making a train track to run around the house or a massive lego city a challenge.

They like the same films, for example raiders of the lost arc. He enjoys playing on the PS with them, something which I have never had any desire to do.

I hate all of the above. I can imagine I might have enjoyed playing with dolls more. I am the odd one out. Don't get me wrong we do a lot of family things and are close but thats just how it goes.

I know a lovely lady with 2 adult sons who said the teenage years when they and her husband really bonded over football were very lonely.

I actually did do a lot with my mum as a teenager. I enjoyed her company and going for lunch and coffee.

I now have a lovely pink bedroom though!

[Chopstheduck]

I do agree with pom bear that girls can be a lot harder! I have one girl and three boys. The girl is the one that causes the most stress.


You can see other women for the girly things. I find that whatever i do with the kids is determined by their interests anyway, and I'm better finding friends to do the actual things I want to do with.

I think it's sometimes better too, jsut to have individual 1:1 times with the kids and really bond with them that way, especially with a larger family. I go to rugby matches with my oldest son, we've both really got into that and support a team. I've done a foodie weekend away with my daughter, and we cook together a lot. My youngest son loves music, and I help him practice his violin, and take him to concerts. His twin loves cycling, and we do a yearly 10 mile bike ride together, and cycle to the supermarket at weekends when we need shopping.

I don't feel left out with the boys at all, because I don't really see any of their interests being totally gender specific. I can't stand football, but they can do that with their dad, and I take them to football training sessions in the holidays and bugger off for a coffee in peace. But I do ohter stuff with them, so def not left out.

[notnagging]

I do make sure we have alot of 1:1 time. It is important in a big family especially with twins. We have a house big enough for them to have their own space as well which makes a big difference. I'm still trying to persuade my dh to convert to pink for the bedroom
But we did all play monopoly as promised today

[PacificDogwood]

I've been thinking about you today, notnagging.

My DH can have the same tendency to let things slide/do stuff for an easy life which leaves me being 'bad cop' which I at times resent. And yes, sometimes I do feel I have 5 boys rather than the 4 child-sized ones .

However, I don't usually feel left out - I actually enjoy being left alone when, for once, they are all doing something testosterony IYKWIM.
I did not despise my mother as such when younger, just had little in common with her; we are v different personalities. I am/was much more similar to my dad, so got on better with him, even when we were fighting over what times I had to be home at.

And I still despise pink - not so much as a colour, there are nice pinks, but for its inexcapability and meh-ness . Shoes however is another matter... but then again I obsessed about them even before I ever had children.

Well done, for playing Monopoly together today. Hope you won!

[notnagging]

Thank you very much Pacific. I do love my peace & quiet sometimes. Motherhood is challenging regardless isn't it?