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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To think that dd1's broken netbook should be replaced or repaired asap at no cost to dd1?

100 replies

D0oinMeCleanin · 01/01/2013 20:53

Dd1 rarely uses it. DH is always on it. He always leaves it rested on the sofa, he never puts it away. Dd2 also likes to use it and leaves it rested on the sofa.

On the rare occasions I have seen dd1 with it she puts it back in the netbook bag I bought her or puts it on top of my xbox under the TV. I have never seen dd1 leave it on the sofa. I have known for her to hide it from DH and dd2, but generally only in places I myself would keep it.

It has been dropped, the hinge and power button have broken. It will turn on but frequently switches itself off. No one is taking responsibility for it. Dd1 is a bad liar. I firmly believe her when she tells me she knew nothing about it being broken until this evening and that it was working fine when she used it last week. DH and dd2 are better liars and both insistent that it was working yesterday, when they used it. I saw it working yesterday when dd2 was last on it. I also saw dd2 close it and put it down, still working. Somewhere between that afternoon and the evening it has been broken. I did not see anyone using it after dd2, when it was still working but I went out to work. It must have happened while I was at work. No one is admitting to using it in this time.

I think it should be repaired or replaced asap because it was dd1's birthday gift last year and she should not have to suffer because other people cannot look after things they borrow. DH is denying any responsibility and saying she should not have a new one if this one cannot be repaired cheaply.

OP posts:
Picturesinthefirelight · 01/01/2013 21:19

YANBU. Dh accidentally put dd's iPod nano through the wash. To apologise he bought her a touch.

D0oinMeCleanin · 01/01/2013 21:23

Well yes, if I had broken it I would be mortified and would arrange a new for one as soon as I could afford to.

DH is not a normal parent though. We would rather deny all knowledge hoping that I believe dd1 has done it and tell her it is her own fault.

I feel like I have three most of the time.

OP posts:
RandomMess · 01/01/2013 21:32
Angry
DixieD · 01/01/2013 21:35

Fucking hell I can't believe your H would do that to a child. How awful for your daughter to be treated like that. The injustice of it is astounding. I would be fuming if my DH behaved like this.

LovesBeingAtHomeForChristmas · 01/01/2013 21:37

Sad your poor dd

seekingpeaceandquiet · 01/01/2013 21:40

Your Dh is behaving like an arse sorry.
You know that it was definitely not dd1 so it should be replaced regardless as its totally unfair on her otherwise. Poor Girl.

SminkoPinko · 01/01/2013 21:41

God, he sounds awful.:( It's a rum deal when you have to stop your husband's pocket money. Does he have redeeming features? I hope so.

ToomuchheuchatendofHogmanay · 01/01/2013 21:41

Jeez, I couldn't live with a grown man who would let an innocent child take the blame for his cockup. Sorry OP but he sounds a complete wanker.

MalibuStac · 01/01/2013 21:42

Poor DD1, I had to ban both DS's from using my laptop because its been dropped and no-one will own up so I'm witholding both pocket monies until the repair is paid for. Your DH is being horrible tbh, making his own child suffer for his carelessness.

Coconutty · 01/01/2013 21:45

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

BluelightsAndSirens · 01/01/2013 21:45

He is really teaching them a really bad relationship towards admitting mistakes and making things right.

I hope your lovely personality rubs off on the DC more than his selfish lying ways do Sad

WeAreEternal · 01/01/2013 21:47

Your DH sounds like a total wanker!
It is really sad and frankly quite disgusting that he would lie to you and try and blame his actions, and what I assume (and hope) was an accident on his daughters.
That is the kind of behaviour that you expect from a teenager not an adult, and certainly not a parent.

I would be taking away his entire holiday money and buying DD1 a top of the range laptop as a replacement and as an apology from him.

TheSkiingGardener · 01/01/2013 21:48

What a foul set of things for your DH to do. Lying, trying to make his DD1 suffer and snooping on you. He's not exactly nice is he?

Cabrinha · 01/01/2013 21:51

He logged into your Facebook account? Why? Have you changed the password yet?

D0oinMeCleanin · 01/01/2013 21:52

No he is not nice. I would like to say that this out of character but, sadly it is not.

Dd1 will be getting her laptop repaired or replaced and I will be still be going to see CAB and the HA as soon as the dc have gone back to school. I would go sooner but they shouldn't have to listen to me explain to a perfect stranger what a loser their father is.

OP posts:
LRDtheFeministDragon · 01/01/2013 21:52

It's a rubbish lie anyway.

So what if it was still working when they used it? If it has an intermittent fault, it could have developed at any time.

Surely the bottom line is, they both use it a lot and it does not belong to them. That isn't on. Now it's damaged they should accept that the majority of use came from them so DD1 deserves a new one and they can carry on using the old one for as long as it is still possible to use.

Bunnyjo · 01/01/2013 21:52

Fucking hell, your H sounds like a total wanker. Who on earth would blame their child for breaking something? and log into your facebook account, sounds like you have way more problems than just this...

We bought DD a Nabi for her Xmas and DH plays with it on an evening. I'd tear him a new arsehole go batshit crazy if he broke it and tried to blame her. Your poor DD Sad

TiaMariaandEggnog · 01/01/2013 21:53

Would your DH really let DD1 suffer rather than admit if he'd broken it? And presumably let DD2 take the rap as she's the only other one that could have broken it? And he has also been logging on to your FB behind your back? Sounds like a really great bloke Hmm

ChippingInLovesChristmasLights · 01/01/2013 21:54

Sorry - but I really cannot believe you are still with him!! What happened to the house you were sorting out??

LRDtheFeministDragon · 01/01/2013 21:56

Btw - I have just checked my comment with my DH who works in the computer industry. He had I have had several netbooks.

He is very clear that the issues you describe are very likely to have been caused by misuse over time, not by it being dropped once. So it is highly unlikely that your DH and DD2 are not at fault, since they are the ones with a history of being careless with this (and your DH is the one setting a bad example to your other DC).

BluelightsAndSirens · 01/01/2013 21:58

Sad oh DOoin, I wish you lots of luck in getting things sorted. Do you have a way of trying to start gathering a deposit or can you stay where you are?

TheHoneyDragonsDrunkInTheIvy · 01/01/2013 22:01

Even a broken hinge LRD? My net book only playedup after my dickwad business partner dropped it making space to put his beer down. The hinge smashed on mine.

ImperialBlether · 01/01/2013 22:15

LRD, do you mean ARE at fault?

LRDtheFeministDragon · 01/01/2013 22:15

I meant the intermittent turning on and off, sorry, should have been clearer. That shouldn't happen just because the hinge broke - he says it would most likely be a long-term problem.

I don't think it's impossible it's not, but unless the OP's DH is absolutely positive he can tell why it's broken, he surely can't know that it wasn't him who did it by being careless before.

ImperialBlether · 01/01/2013 22:16

I feel really sorry for your DD1, OP. Your DH sounds vile.