to be upset and worried when DH says 'one day you will come home and find the puppy not here'

[punter]

Ok we have had a busy day, son, wife and grandchildren(3) arrived for the afternoon, all had bad colds and were noisy and everywhere. I had to keep puppy in crate or outside as the youngest is a newborn. I made the kids their tea, cups of tea and cake for grown ups whilst men tried to set up apple tv. Then after they left I made a roast chicken dinner. Puppy back in with us, slightly hyper then DH says the above. I have left him to the tv, what a horrid thing to say.

Ask him what he ment!

Did he not want to get the puppy?

Depends how he said it and in what context etc. We have a newish kitten which scrabbles about getting under my feet all day. With toddler and baby also in the house this often gets on nerves to the point where I say things like 'that bloody cat isn't going to make it til the end of the day'. I would absolutely not harm the cat though.

I threaten to cook the rabbit all the time. It's a joke!

My ex once killed my puppies while I was out with DS. I came home to find them - well, I won't go into details, but they were dead and he did it, and he said "I told you not to let the bloody dog out when she was in season, and I told you what I'd do if she had puppies".
Please ask your husband to clarify what he meant and don't let him actually hurt your pup :( :(

Tell him if Puppy goes missing so will parts of him and his life as he currently knows it

My SDad once got rid of our dog while the family was out at work / school because he didn't like him. I got home to find a stranger in the house and went upstairs to change. When I came down the dog was gone. :(

Is your DH abusive, OP? I'm asking because my dad was violent.

Agree it depends on context. I threaten to cook the cats/make them into gloves - I love them and wouldn't dream of hurting them.

If it's not an exasperated joke or just a ridiculous joke, it's quite frightening.

I love my dog. I don't have kids so he is the thing I look after and is a big part of my life. If someone said that to me I'd tell them that when they come home they will find the locks changed

Oh my god Pom

If this wasn't said as a joke (and am sure you know whether it was said jokingly or not) then yes it's a horrible thing to say and you're right to be worried.

Abuse of animals is a 'red flag' for domestic violence.

Pom and Sunny - how awful. My sympathies to both of you :(

Dear God Pom and Sunny....! Sunny did you get him back? I am guessing not :(

Once a teenage lad tried to grab my dog off the street - I have never been so close to harming another person in my life - I don't remember what I said exactly but I do remember him backing down very fast and looking very sheepish.

My dad once threatened our dog and although I was only a child, I remember thinking how cowardly it was........

No, we didn't. The person he went to was vile and treated him very badly, but he was thankfully rescued and lived his golden years in comfort.

I've forgiven DSD for a lot, but I'll never forgive that.

My DGM's DH or is it SGF took her dog to the vet and had it put down whilst she was at work. He later murdered her, her body was found on the kitchen floor he stepped over it for four days.

I don't have words to express my disgust and sympathy when I read your post.

Sorry, OP, I meant

no advise just crying here. Poor puppies and doggies

Sorry advice.

Bloody Hell! Some horrible stories here!
Op, we don't know your Husband so it's impossible to comment really. Both my dh and I talk about throttling/ giving away the pets/kids all the time! Needless to say I'm not concerned.

Nutty :( and

My own XP was a bully and emotionally abused me. One day when we were having an argument he picked up our cat by his neck and threw him on the sofa.

I'll never forget the look of fear on his wee face (he was ok by the way..our cat, he died of old age a couple of years ago).

There are other stories I know of.

It is heartbreaking.

We're the dgc, your son or his wife cooing over the puppy at all? Could he be joking about them taking the puppy home one day because they liked it so much?

I came back into the room about an hour later and there was a half hearted excuse - 'you know I am tired and it has been a busy day' etc etc. The original remark was not said in a light hearted way.
Yes my DH can be abusive when he is stressed. But he would not do anything, just loses it verbally. Cowardly sums it up. I try to keep the peace but find I am hurt far more with comments about the puppy than any about me!

But he would not do anything, just loses it verbally. Cowardly sums it up

Do be careful punter - that's what I always thought, my ex was a small man, and an alcoholic, and I always thought he couldn't physically harm me because I was bigger and would fight back and he knew it, but pups are weak and smaller and obviously couldn't fight back. I eventually threw ex out when he hit no1 son hard, knocked him flying and that was it instantly, but I realised later, after a lot of soul searching, that part of the reason we stayed together so long was that because I was capable of defending myself physically, and knew he was a coward, I just got complacent and never thought he'd attack anyone/thing else iyswim. He only did it once, but that was once too often.