to wish that my niece has boys and not girls

[FunnysFuckingFreezing]

I come from a family of girls, the only DGC have been girls. We are a very female family.

My lovely niece who is 23 bought my two boys Jenga for Christmas 'to help them concentrate' .My boys are proper boyish boys and I think that when she visited in the summer she was a bit about their general boyishness. In fact my whole family are a bit about how boys are, having only had experience of us girls who would sit and read etc

I really hope that when she has DC she has proper boys and then she will realise that game of Jenga is not going to make a 2yo sit still and 'concentrate'

Incidentally we all had a ball playing Jenga with 7yo DS1 who can concentrate with the best of them!

In RL most people would agree with you OP. Boys do tend to be more boisterous, and girls calmer and more able to occupy themselves. Any one of my friends/acquaintances would agree with you.

On MN, well it's different.......!

Ummmmm

Whatever you do, don't let your sons see Jenga. It turns boys gay.

Our DS2 got a Jenga game. How does he play it? Stack it up carefully, then knock it down with a whoop! I suspect he enjoys the knocking it down much more than the stacking it up part.

I think it's only mothers of girls who think the OP is sexist, I have 2 DSs and a DD, the difference is energy levels, of course my DD likes to play out and run around but IMO boys just need it more, of course this is a massive generalisation but its seems to be the case to me.

No I have a boy and I think it's sexist

OP if this had been about the jenga game not being a good way to get a 2 year old to concentrate then YWNBU

But it's bollocks about "proper" boys.

You can say "lighthearted" all you like - doesn't mean you're not being an idiot.

Your niece might have girls who are very active and loud and like to run around, or might have boys who are quiet and prefer to play sitting-down games.

Unfortunately it sounds like if she did have active girls you would consider them to be being naughty whereas active boys would be boys being boys.

I only have dds and they are crazy, boisterous and they never stop moving. And my 9yo hasn't worn a dress since she was 3, infact out of 4 of my dd only one is what i'd call a girly girl. My 4yo is obsessed with power rangers and knows all the moves, she would give any boy a run for his money lol!

My nephew likes pushing pushchairs & playing with dolls.

Boys and girls cannot be determined by sex alone, that is the truth.

Buying Jenga for a two year old to concentrate is mildly amusing. Fuck all to do with what the child has between their legs.

Let's imagine you wrote this without all the sexist boys-are-boys-and-girls-are-girls shall we?

AIBU to hope that my niece has boisterous-natured children? Everyone else on her side of the family has very calm children who like to sit and read and they act very about my DCs who like to run around. They aren't naughty, they just have a different temperament.

There. YANBU.

Seems everyone is a little bit touchy today .

I understand where the OP is coming from. It's not that her DSs were given Jenga but the fact that they were given Jenga by a judgy relative in an apparent bid to help them concentrate (underlying assumption that as boys they cannot concentrate).

Jenga is one of my all time favourite games. Your niece sounds lovely.

Christmas spirit alive and well on here today I see

Nope, I'm the mother of a boy and I think it's sexist too.

But if you'd written Trills version I would have said YANBU.

So can I just check - 'lighthearted' sexism is fine. Presumably 'lighthearted' racism is also cool. And 'lighthearted' homophobia. Gah!

OP - why not try and see children as people, not little gender stereotypes? They are so interesting and diverse, why not embrace that as a xmas gift to yourself? Peace to all...

No, Tryharder the bit of the OP I didn't like is the phrase "My boys are proper boyish boys!"

Which implies that those of us who have boys who like to run around, can sit still for hours and concentrate and like reading etc are not "proper boys"!

Maybe you should take up a hobby, or go outdoors and do something, rather than spending so much time thinking about what sex of children your niece may have once she is actually pregnant

Mind you, your threads almost got me wishing she has boys as well, since the girls of your family don't seem to have many years of a life until their reproductive duties take over.

So is Jenga not a boys' game then?

Must add that one to my little notebook

And FTR, I have a boy who can't concentrate. He has ADHD. He would have no problem setting up and playing Jenga. Clearly the problem lies with the way you discipline your boys, OP, rather than with your niece.

Poor op - my boys are (dare I say it) 'stereotypical boys' and DH is currently running them round a nearby field to stop them going mental in the house later. There ARE mothers of girls who see such boisterousness as bad behaviour. I have experienced it myself. I love it when we meet boisterous girls as I feel much less judged as a parent.

I remember once being on a ferry and our then 3 yr old son was literally rolling around under the table shouting 'mummy milk' (a phrase that he had picked up from a friend's son who was breastfed) whilst at the next table a lady doing a little phonics activity with her same-aged quiet daughter gave us pitying looks. My son was actually a brilliant reader at that point but if you had taken that snapshot of both those kids, her child looked every inch the scholar and mine every inch a flipping lunatic :)

I have two sons now and am just used to it.

Ds is a stereotypical boy and was with other stereotypical boys Christmas Eve running around and playing games and trying to sneak outside. There were also some stereotypical girls who didn't move off the sofa at the local pub and spent their time chatting to each other.

On Christmas Day we had a long and leisurely lunch in a local restaurant where other diners commented on how lovely ds was and what beautiful manners he had.

I would describe ds as a boyish boy in the sense that he much prefers running around outside, getting wet and muddy rather than being inside with his head in a book. It may be just the group of girls I know but none of them are like that. I was like that as a child and again I didn't know many other girls who were similar.

When ds's year had an afternoon and evening out making camps in the woods the boys were absolutely filthy when we went to collect them. The girls were all clean and looked as if they had spent the afternoon shopping rather than in the woods. I asked ds if he had enjoyed it. He said he'd loved it but that the boys had to build the camps as the girls didn't want to get muddy.

My son reads and concentrates on things. Has done ever since I started reading to him at 6 months. He's 4 now. They're all different