To tell my ds12 Father Christmas doesn't exist

[notnagging]

My ds (9) told my eldest ds (12) that Father Christmas didn't exist, on Christmas Eve ! He then asked my dh who confirmed it.I said he could've waited until after Christmas. Ds went to bed upset & has asked me to tell him the true. I said the others were just being miserable. Tbh I'm surprised he still believes & I thought he was just going along with it for his younger siblings. What should I say?

Tell him the truth he's TWELVE YEARS OLD! Unless he is SN? Then I'm not sure what would be best.

No no no! I've just got away with it with my12yo, he's humming and haaing whether santa is real all day - we convinced him he is It'll be the last year we can get away with it though.

He's not sn just not as clued up as his younger ds. He is very sensitive & hormonal at the moment. He looked at me like his world had ended

you were cruel and foolish to lie to him in the first place - but you weren't alone. i cannot understand why people do this.

santa is a great game and can be enjoyed by children without their being lied to by their parents. why on earth should he trust you again if you kept up a pretence for twelve years? why did you expose him to the ridicule of his peers?

Wow I just had no idea secondary school aged children could still believe in Santa! How on earth have they avoided finding out? A rotten little girl in my class told me he wasn't real when i was 6. I'm quite amazed!

Thanks peaceandlove- a bit harsh. He'll never trust me again?

You really really need to tell him the truth - peace
is right, his mates would rip him to shreds at this age for still believing in Santa.

I dont think I was cruel or foolish to tell him that father christmas existed when he was younger.He is the eldest of 5 & has younger ds's who still believe. He is in that transition from primary to secondary where I guess his views will be gradually changed. I didn't realise he was being serious. I thought he was just going along with it for the younger ds'. I'm a bit worried about his comments on the tooth fairy & easter bunny now

We don't all force our children to be mini-adults. Personally I rather like children who are still children. Time enough in life for the harsh realities and burdens adulthood bring.

In reality, my DS is probably playing me along, but I think he really did waiver and decide it's best to keep believing, for just one more year!

Don't forget leprechauns

Sorry, don't really see how telling your kids the truth when they ask you straight out about something is snatching their childhood from them - seems like they're growing up and questioning things anyway...

I will tell him. But I don't think I was cruel in letting my children think these things existed when they were younger. My ds2 doesn't believe but he's alot more savvy. They are all completely different.

I don't think he believes in leprechauns but I think I best double check now

I don't think it's cruel at all either! But would definitely be unfair of you not to tell him the truth now, when he obviously trusts you to be honest with him.

I will do. I should have clocked earlier. He made such a fuss about getting his food ready & getting treats for the reindeers. I thought he was going along with it for my other ds who's 5.
Btw they only get one present from Father Christmas & it's always something cheap & cheerful which I guess has made it easier.

My DS2 twigged when he was 6 or 7 - on the grounds me and Santa used the same wrapping paper - no flies on that one

I think I kept my DS1 going

Leprechauns would be plain stupid - that isn't part of our culture - however St Nicholas was a real person who has a real grave, actually he has two, he was buried in two places - therefore Santa is real

That's a good point Holly. Thank you!

I found some info about Saint Nicholas which I will read to them in the morning.
www.stnicholascenter.org/pages/real-santa/
I will explain that people keep up the tradition in his honour. They only get one present from him anyway so that fits in nicely. Thank you

Of course leprechauns exist!!!!

Who else makes the shoes?

I'm going to have to find some evidence for that goat bong

Oh dear. I thought that brownies made the shoes and Leprechauns hid their gold at the ends of rainbows...have I been told LIES?!

At least I know the Easter Bunny is real.

Cruel my arse. It's a funny time, 12. I get a hint my own ds (also 12) is a little bit sad this year. I can't quite put my finger on it, but I remember feeling the same - it's exciting growing up but then people bang on about it being "for the children" and you don't really get toys anymore (not that you really want them) and you're not sure where you fit in. The Father Christmas thing is probably just a symptom of that, or symbolic maybe.

Poor love. fwiw my ds only stopped believing last Christmas. I think I clung on ever later than that despite having caught my (drunken) grandma filling my stocking years before when I was about 8.

People believe all sorts of bunkum well into adulthood - at least Father Christmas is harmless and fun, unlike the 2012 apocalypse rubbish and astrology.

Astrology = science = real

There is an interesting article in the guardian as well. It explains that Father Christmas is a 'Macroscopic Quantum Object'. That enables him to be in various places at the same time undetected. If anyone at school says anything to him I shall tell him to quote that.