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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to think if you are going to 'hide' someone on FB

30 replies

aprilrain · 20/12/2012 21:08

... then you might as well be honest and delete them! I have no qualms about deleting people who annoy me on Facebook (unless they are family members).

What is the point in hiding people?

OP posts:
AllSnowballsAndNoKnickers · 20/12/2012 21:11

But really - what does it matter? Is this seriously something you should concern yourself with?

exexpat · 20/12/2012 21:11

When they are family members and post endless copy-and-paste status crap or stuff about their new-found religious beliefs etc but deleting them would be noticed/resented.

Purple2012 · 20/12/2012 21:11

I have hidden peoples newsfeeds as they are annoying but family so the fall out if i was to delete wouldnt be worth it. I have deleted a couple of hundred people though as i dont really interact with them in real life and have just kept proper friends and family.

TunipTheVegedude · 20/12/2012 21:13

They can still see you if you hide them. I have a few friends who I like but who post every last random thing on their FB feed, many times a day. If I keep them as friends they can see my stuff, and we can chat, and I can look at their wall from time to time to make sure nothing major has happened, and wish them happy birthday, so we stay in touch, but I don't get their every update.

goldenlula · 20/12/2012 21:14

I have hidden two famil members, one from my side and one from dh's, as I did not like their language or the disgusting 'jokes' they put on there, but to delete them would cause family conflict. I have hidden one friend, but only because I found some of his stuff irritating, but occasionally like to catch up with what he is up to.

rainrainandmorerain · 20/12/2012 21:17

Hiding has its place - I have a few friends who are endlessly posting uplifting 'inspirational' messages, and one who posts obsessively about animal rights (along with some nasty pics) - but they are friends, I like them a lot on the whole! and it is good to be able to message them on facebook, and have some interaction. I just don't want to see everything they post...

i deleted one person for being offensively misogynist - and then his partner for being abusive. That's different territory. I'm not in touch with them any more.

freddiefrog · 20/12/2012 21:17

I've hidden MiL because of the endless guff she posts, but unfriending her would cause massive ructions with the inlaws

Hiding is win-win - I don't have to see the shit she posts + no offence = easy life

AllSnowballsAndNoKnickers · 20/12/2012 21:18

YY to the animal rights/horrendous pics thing rain - I have one who does that all day long (or so it seems!) and double YY to the 'inspirational' shit. I do sometimes wonder how pissed you'd have to be before that crud made a lightbulb go on in your head!

Original poster
aprilrain · 20/12/2012 21:18

AllSnowballs - am I only allowed to talk about serious stuff on here? My apologies for starting a trivial conversation.

OP posts:
Fakebook · 20/12/2012 21:19

I've hidden my sil. She's a passive aggressive bitch.

Lovecat · 20/12/2012 21:19

I deleted one bloke who posted an unending stream of drivel, song lyrics, random political bollocks... he got v. stroppy about it and as I had to see him regularly in a social setting it wasn't worth the hassle. So I refriended and then hid him. Problem solved.

I have blocked someone's mother who decided I'd somehow wronged her daughter and started sending me stroppy pms!

threesocksfullofchocs · 20/12/2012 21:20

I hide people who annoy me.
but sometimes it is kind of "political" to keep them,
they don't know I have hidden them, so saves a row

OutragedAtThePriceOfFreddos · 20/12/2012 21:21

I've hidden a couple of people. One is a lovely lady, she just happens to post a lot of shite that I can't be bothered to scroll through. The other is a lovely guy, but he only ever uses Facebook to post links to his small business, which I'm not interested in.

I wouldn't want to delete them, I like them, I just don't like their posts. The hide function is useful.

FestiveWench · 20/12/2012 21:22

I hide lots of people just because they post a lot.

But I still like to look at what they post every now and then. I just don't like them taking over and cluttering up my feed. And I unhide them when they have babies and post lots of cute pics :)

appletarts · 20/12/2012 21:22

How do you hide someone? Wish RL was like that!

BarceyDussell · 20/12/2012 21:23

I see your point op. I hid someone i didnt want to be friends with but didnt want to have the hassle of 'breaking up' with but shecould still see me and carried on commenting on my stuff. I deleted her in the end and told her i didnt want to be her friend any longer. It was very liberating and felt much more honest than hiding her.

Original poster
aprilrain · 20/12/2012 21:25

Ok I can understand your reasons - but it just seems dishonest somehow. If someone is a good enough friend in RL, surely you can put up with their FB drivel. And if they are not a good friend, delete. (Family members are an exception)

OP posts:
SomersetONeil · 20/12/2012 21:31

The entire point of Facebook though, is that it isn't just good friends. If you boiled it down to just good friends, the whole thing would go under. Xmas Grin

TunipTheVegedude · 20/12/2012 21:33

Surely hiding someone because they're a bitch is dangerous, because you might forget they're there and talk about them?

TempusFuckit · 20/12/2012 21:34

I hide people, mainly family and former/current colleagues for the same reasons as others have given - but I've also gone one further and created a list without a handful of people on it do they can't see what I've posted, one because she liked literally every post I put on within minutes, and it got a bit stalkery - but as I work closely with her it would be very awkward to have deleted her.

Dishonest maybe, but is it that different to being civil to people irl for the sake of sociability? Facebook is social oiling, it's rarely that meaningful.

Original poster
aprilrain · 20/12/2012 21:37

Somerset - I'm not suggesting you delete all of your not-close-in-RL friends. Just the ones whose statuses get on yer tits.

OP posts:
SomersetONeil · 20/12/2012 21:37

Tunip - you only hide what they say; you don't hide them altogether.

Plus, if you're posting bitchy stuff on someone's public wall for all to see (rather than in PM), then you have more problems then potentially forgetting who've you got hidden and who you haven't!

NotWankinginaWinterWonderland · 20/12/2012 21:37

I had no idea you could have 'friends' then hide them, I don't really like Facebook and it all came out when I was very usually drunk one evening.

I had 110 'friends' I wiped them all out, I even wiped out my brother for annoying me that week, got down to 23 relatives and thought 'wtf am I doing here?' so left! Xmas Grin

NotWankinginaWinterWonderland · 20/12/2012 21:37

UN-usually!! FGS! Xmas Blush

SomersetONeil · 20/12/2012 21:39

Yeah, I know, I'm just saying, though... It's not as easy as simply deleting people, depending on your connection with them. Sometimes it's just aside to hide and ignore, rather than delete and deal with the 'political' fall-out. Kind of like real life. :)

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