To think I can't be the only person spending Christmas alone?

[ClementineKelandra]

Because right now I feel like I am.

Is it through choice, Op?

Why are you spending it alone?

What about children? Siblings? Parents?

Nope. My uncle is spending Christmas alone and no-one can convince him otherwise.

Talk to folk. I'd be horrified to think of someone alone at Christmas. They'd be getting invited right away!

Are u ok op? X

I bloody wish I was. Ex partner has been invited to stay with me and DCs by ex MIL, as he has recently split from OW2 so we've got him for a week. I will need o hide all my booze as he is a 'recovering' alcoholic. I am dreading it.

OP, I hope you're ok. Is the anything nice that you can do on your own? I remember going home to an empty flat after dropping DCs off with ex and then-OW and it does just feel horrible. It's so quiet. I would basically eat cake, watch trashy Xmas films and get through a stuff of a lot of wine....

you know we'll be here, don't you? Holding hands... :)

Not at all. There are thousands of people alone at Christmas. And many more find this time of year hard for personal reasons, myself included.

Christmas shines a spotlight on loss and loneliness.
If you're dreading the day itself, is it too late to volunteer for anything such as Crisis or Sally Army?

Nope- me too. I was dreading it earlier in the year, but now it's closer and after a really busy time at work I think I might indulge my inner anti social cow

I did it last year - painted the living room, took dog for walk on the beach and watched the last Harry Potter. It was lovely. But this was by choice and I have never celebrated Christmas that much anyway.

I assume if it is not by choice you might not feel so happy about it, but you are certainly not alone. 250,000 pensioners will be alone for starters. And I bet quite a few separated parents.

Sorry if you are dreading it.

No, you're not OP. My MIL does this (through choice) each year and refuses to join any family members because she likes her tv, M+S meal, nibbles and the peace and quiet. Can you spend the day treating yourself?

I always drop off mince pies and cake to the local shelters if I'm feeling blue on Christmas. Really cheers my up. Might be too late to volunteer but I recommend it if being alone isn't your bag. Especially youth shelters. Those kids will cheer up anyone at Christmas.

I'm on my own, just me and dogs x

My sister does. Dad can't understand it and tries to invite her over but she likes lounging on the sofa with a duvet eating what she wants and wwatching what she wants.

This year, she's going on a coach trip to Scotland so she'll be able to do the same and won't even have to do washing up.

Don't think I'd swap her Christmas for mine with DS (3) but she enjoys it and at least gets a lie-in.

Not really by choice.

I do have a young dc who will be with but she's too young to really get it. Older dc off to ex this year. I have very toxic parents who haven't bothered inviting me to theirs. No invites from any other direction.

I don't feel really really crap, just flat really. It's going to be really weird.

Lots of people spending it with family will be miserable and wishing they weren't there. Think about the post Christmas rush to see solicitors to get divorces rolling.

What I am trying to say is that don't torture yourself by thinking everyone else has it better. Get some lovely food and a film you've always wanted to watch. It's just a day, admittedly one weighed down with lots of expectations, but still just another day.

Enjoy it OP. Me? just me and DC and we love it. and even when I wasnt a parent i loved the day alone, duvet day watching crap on tv and eating crap and feeling good about it too.

at some point during day Id have a long hot bubbly bath and then relax with a wine or -hic-2, and christmas day tv.

better than arguing with all and sundry/stressing over meal-seriously-who likes brussel sprouts????/washing up/mess everywhere.....

You're not alone then op.
You have a 3 year old, at that age they'll believe the fantasy and you can make it magical.
I've got chances to go to family (who I love) but choose to have Christmas with my ds17, and have done for the last few years.
We have a lovely lazy, happy day.
Enjoy it.

Go for a lovely walk somewhere - I don't know where you are but nothing better than a walk on a quiet beach. Or just relish the peace, wear pajamas all day and eat chocolate!? You will have one DC to share it with and they will love doing whatever you are doing.

REmember it is just a day and alot of people won't be celebrating.

I have the choice between spending the day alone (older boys at their dads) or going to exmils. They don't want me there but I am invited as I will have ds3 with me.

You aren't actually alone though, are you? You can make the day magical for even the smallest dc and you do have their company. Just have a lazy day doing exactly what suits the pair of you.

I'm not exactly on my own for the whole of Christmas but DS is off to his dads for a week from Saturday and it will be the first time in 15 years that I won't be spending Christmas Eve/Day with him

you can start making your own Christmas traditions for you and dc no matter how young they are. It can be whatever you want

Better alone than what happened with our neighbours a couple of years ago. Blazing row from about 7pm due to an affair (heard it all was so loud) to 11 or so. Stuff getting smashed, screaming, police were called, both parents taken away and 2 little kids stuck in the middle.

Was the most awful thing I have heard and was on the point of going round to check no one had been murdered when the police came. Still think about the kids, must have been the worst christmas ever.

Oh how awful witchface.

Reminds me of something that happened a few months ago.

A friend of my DS was away with the school. It was the little boys mum's birthday during that time and she died of a heart attack whilst whooping it up. If that wasn't tragic, it gets worse, a few days later his dad left him with the grandparents and hanged himself

So, maybe, we should count our blessings.

I am effectively on my own. I'm finishing work on Christmas Eve, driving 100 odd miles, staying in a hotel and visiting my mother in her care home on Christmas Day. I'm then driving home. I have a sister who lives nearer my mother who is visiting her on Christmas Eve morning and hasn't invited me over to their house on Christmas Day. I'm glad I'm going back to work on 27th. If I hadn't had to visit my mum I would have been volunteering on the day itself.

Clipped - how awful.