For standing up against the social work and going this far ...

[BipedalSpecies]

First, I dont know if Mumsnet is the best forum for this, but it has the most appropriate user base I could find.

3.5 or so years ago I told the head of social work and education if they did not stop segregating and descriminating against my daughter I would see them in court.

2.5 years ago 2 social workers and a social care worker came to my door and threatened to remove my children if we did not comply with them.

Then they went to the police and the care worker made an anonymous complaint stating she saw my partner assualt our kids. Her timeline states my partner was positively identified by her description, woman with dark hair in a ponytail, by another worker six weeks before they even met her.

I had reports about me sent from the school regarding injuries on my daughter blamed on me. Interestingly enough in one case three members of staff saw my daughter injure herself in school, yet one member reported it to social work as abuse. You just cant make this up.

I covertly recorded social workers and made a complaint against them regarding them using false information in child protection meetings and giving the prosecution against us false information, backed up by my video.

I was branded a liar and our kids placed on the child protection register.

Court proceedings started. I submitted my video evidence. Court case was dropped.

The council refuse to watch the video. They also illegally accessed my medical records claiming I gave signed consent, which they cannot produce. (along with another 3 billion wrong pieces of information they cannot back up e.g. according to them and only them Im an ex drug addict and a current alcoholic)

Now the Scottish Public Services Ombudsman has recommended they watch the video by end of January.

The Information Commissioner's Office has asked them to explain themselves by mid January.

So my question is: Am I wrong to bury these people up to their necks by going to the media when all my investigations are finished?

BTW my case was closed to them over 1.5 years ago and Ive been fighting this 2.5 years, so Im not planning on taking any prisoners after so much effort.

Also the head of social work said 'nothing has gone fundamentally wrong' and the person in charge of the complaint circled the wagons and I am willing to publicly say, covered up for the workers. After all I told him where the evidence was and he refused to do anything except repeat the falsifications of the workers he was supposed to investigate. The request for a copy of the medical records authorisation in itself speaks volumes.

I also got told that I should drop my complaint because 'next time we will have the police with us and it wont be for a cup of tea and a chat'.

Did you tell them at the start of the recording? Because tbh thats quite intimidating behaviour if you didn't. Imagine if it was the other way round and they were recording you without saying. I'm still not saying your case is right or wrong btw. As it would be impossible to judge.

Do you really think social workers have time and resources to waste on people, dragging it through the courts, when there is no risk to the child?

Unfortunately, yes, sometimes they do. This could be to save face when an earlier allegation was found to be baseless, or for revenge because the parent made a complaint about them. It does happen.

Stupidly busy schedule? You really shouldn't believe everything you read in the press, Ryle.

And if you are engaging with sws in numerous London borough council departments, you're best advised not to believe that those whose decisions can have a profound impact on the lives of others are fully qualified to make them.

Although I have had no adversarial formal dealings with sws or educators north of the border, I have no reason to believe they are any dfferent to those who are employed in these professions in the remainder of what is currently the United Kingdom.

Barbie, I can understand your point about saving face. But, unless the social worker had a serious problem themselves, then you wouldn't just try to split up a family to save face. Social workers don't make these decisions alone, it is backed by other professionals, and even then the ultimate decision isn't in their hands. The majority of social workers go in to this profession for the right reasons. It would be extremely rare for someone to push it, when they are in the wrong, just to save face. Not unheard of, but very unusual.

Sorry izzy, I should have said, I am a social worker. Yes, stupidly busy schedule.

As barbie has said, it does happen. Furthermore, it has happened and it will continue to happen until there is transparency in Family Court proceedings.

I assumed you were in scotland because of social work and education being one dept, not any other reason.

Well its late. Not going to spend the night debating this. Might pop back tomorrow if its still going. I hope it works out for you.

Social workers don't make these decisions alone, it is backed by other professionals.

'Expert Witnesses' are retained and paid for by SS. It is in their interests to back up the 'findings' of SS as they will not be asked again. They are paid a ridiculously large amount of money for their services.

RyledUp what if I told you dissent such as that of the head teacher was disregarded?

What if I told you I was getting weekly blood tests, to find out what was affecting me, showed I was not a heavy drinker?

I did not tell them the camera was recorded, but the way I see it is I shouldnt have had to. They forced me to take the action because they changed the wording of every single meeting. I dont see why I should ever have to say to anyone, even kids 'please be honest, this is being recorded'. They should be unquestionably honest, this is peoples lives.

Contained in the 'person details', SWS computer entries for a case, is a description of a room of mine. For months it is documented as a computer or games room. I make the recording and all of a sudden they say it is the control room for my spy cameras that I have all through my house and invade the childrens privacy using. They say I admit this during the recorded interview.

Can you imagine being the children's reporter in this case? After months you are now prepared to go to court, one of the workers is a twenty plus year veteran. Then you get a video that utterly destroys their word.

What a waste of time, money and effort. Then there is the emotional impact and the nightmares. Innocent people dont sleep too well with these types of allegations.

Yes it was pretty frustrating dealing with school with the situation RyleDup. I reallydo have minutes and its us (the parents) the first of three head teachers, child psychologist and an autism expert. The HT is actually on record saying she disagrees with both of them.

Thats why we ended up in a meeting with the head of social work and education. It took months and months to get a placement for our daughter too.

Ok, it's hard to know where to start with this.

I agree, that they should not misrepresent what you have said in meetings and I too, would be recording every word if I felt that was happening. I don't understand why things like this are not recorded as a matter of routine by SS anyway, tbh - like police interviews under caution. It would save so much time and money over 'he said. she said' and would clear up so many arguments that waste taxpayer's money and SS and lawyers/police time.

I agree with sockreturningpixie that going to the press will not exactly put you in a good light, but I understand the utter frustration of feeling that SS are involved in a cover up or a conspiracy against you, that you are not being listened to, and that you are being lied about, and that those lies are going on public record. I would probably feel the same, and I would have a burning need for justice.

Having said all that.......(and I agree with everything sockreturningpixie said on page 1) it is so difficult to advise or to form an opinion about SS's behaviour here when we have so little background info to go on about why your children are involved with social services in the first place. Why on earth did the GP make the connection that you had been fighting? Do you have a history of violence? You say your daughter harms herself and has had injuries sustained while at school, but have your children had injuries that SS believe have been caused by your or your partner in the past?

If your daughter was climbing on tables and attacking other pupils on a regular basis then she needed to be removed from the classroom for her own safety and everybody else's. Obviously that should be backed up with intensive support to help her overcome her problems with a view to re-integrating her into the mainstream classroom, but as an immediate solution I think the school did the only thing they could. Perhaps they were not equipped with the resources to have a one-to-one support worker with her at that specific time, but patience and co-operation from you would (I imagine) have resulted in a better long term outcome for your daughter, with the right support in place. But it cannot just happen overnight, you know, and others have a right to learn/work in a safe and calm environment in the interim.

You seem to have had a defensive, knee-jerk reaction to the segregation of your daughter instead of looking at the bigger picture. which makes me wonder if you are perhaps you are viewed as bullish, uncooperative, stubborn and difficult to deal with in the eyes of school and SS?

Also, why did they need to say that next time you met with them the police would be there and 'it won't be for a cup of tea and a chat?' that, to me, suggests you get aggressive and intimidating towards the SW's in meetings?

I've just read your OP again - are you saying that your children did or did not have a SW prior to your daughter being put into exclusion at school? You say a whole year went by before SS knocked on your door and threatened to remove your children. What was happening in that year?

And you say 'according to them, and only them' you are an ex-drug addict and a current alcoholic.

Are you saying, then, that you are NOT an ex-drug addict and either a current or ex-alcoholic?

um

what does the 'um' mean?

wow okay. I agree with izzy and barbie as I (a lawyer at the time) had a rather nasty dealing with SS when I reported my ex partner's abusive behaviour, but I had already removed my DC from the environment long before this. It was ridiculous, and lasted many months. I was a 'perfect' mother always but they were fixated on the fact I was 'young' (I don't think 20s is young) relative to my ex partner, and went crazy digging as if they had nothing else to do except try and hit a target for a financial incentive to remove my child. It was a nightmare. There was no support, there was a lot of misrecording what I had said. It was extremely frustrating.

However I think fellationelson raises the pertinent points in this matter

sorry, sleep deprived 'um' not helpful!

I can't really add a lot, clearly but I would say, whatever you do don't do it through anger. Make sure you are calm and collected and completely rational. It's great you have the support of the school now and you have collated all evidence that you can. Now keep your cool. It sounds like some of this started off because you defensively knee jerked at some point. I think there are other avenues you could go down also if your DD is not receiving the support required in terms of a health issue

don't play into the role youve been set in, is what I'm trying to say. And if it's largely blown over, let the dust settle and focus on your children (though retain all evidence)

Yes, cafecito, that is exactly what I was trying to say. However frustrating it may be, the only way to come out on top when battling against authority is to do it by calm, rational, measured stealth, and to be seen to be co-operative and approachable at every turn. Of course, continue to gather any evidence you feel is pertinent to your case but don't go off all guns blazing at every turn - it'll get you nowhere. It just plays into their hands that you are violent and irrational.

yy OP I don't want to patronise but imagine you are a lawyer and your client has come to you in these circumstances. Really try and imagine that. Now you've got the foundations of the case, but as a lawyer you will try and build that case until it's perfect. You'll collect as much as possible and have it in perfect order. Now as a lawyer you'll also remove all emotion from this. You'll be deaing with your head and tactics. If it makes sense to keep quiet for the moment, do so. Lawyers would only go to the press usually after winning a case. It's too soon and won't help you at the moment imo. You need to protect your family and to do that you need your head screwed on.

The trouble with things like this, is that it they can be similar to situations where detectives trap a murderer using methods that are not quite above board, and then the trial collapses on technicalities. The murderer is the murderer, the police know he is the murderer, the lawyers know he is the murderer, but they have to let him go because someone got sloppy, or over-zealous and cocked up.

(not suggesting you are a mudererer, OP but you get my point, I hope.....)

You may have the high ground in a technical sense BiPed, but somewhere along the line there is a vulnerable child with behavioural/MH issues here, whose problems may be entirely due to being parented by someone with complex problems/addictions etc, who may have been at risk of serious harm, and that, sadly, can get lost in amongst adults squabbling over procedure; each trying to create smokescreens and covering their own backs. That label could just as well apply to you, BiPed as to the social workers, for all we know. It's very sad for the children caught in the middle and very frustrating for others to hear about.

What Fellatio said, all of it.

OP, I understand you feel that you have been badly treated. If that is the case, and you have lodged formal complaints, they will eventually be heard and the social workers dealt with. Or not.

But either way makes no difference to you and your family now and your time and efforts (and anger) might be better channelled.

Being up half the night posting on here about it a few years later doesn't help her. Being angry and resentful and trying to convince complete strangers that you were right also doesn't help her.

I don't think that social workers are all saints - I'm sure that like the general population there are SWs who make mistakes, and SWs who do things wrong. But there are also many, many parents who are abusive and neglectful and simply can't see it.

So there will always be two sides to every story. You are never going to be able to post here and have everyone immediately believe you are 100% right and everyone else is conspiring against you.

'The trouble with things like this, is that it they can be similar to situations where detectives trap a murderer using methods that are not quite above board, and then the trial collapses on technicalities. The murderer is the murderer, the police know he is the murderer, the lawyers know he is the murderer, but they have to let him go because someone got sloppy, or over-zealous and cocked up Or because he is Colin Stagg entirely innocent, Fellatio.

As you've said, the only way 'to come out on top when battling against authority is to do it by calm, rational, measured stealth' because, although there can be smoke without fire, it's very often the case that those who have their reputations and their pensions the most to lose by being found out in a lie will resort to stealth to create a smokescreen in the hope that it will obscure the truth.

I've long admired your responses and hold the view that you come from a good place but, in this instance, is it possible you may be reading things into Biped's post that don't exist?

As for your contention that 'there will always be two sides to every story. Mary, it seems to me this directly contradicts mumsnet's 'we believe you' campaign and begs the question of at what point do we choose not to believe women who claim to be victims of the hidebound and prejudiced white male dominated society that prevails in these sceptred isles?

Well it's possible izzy but when confronted with such a one-sided story full of holes and glaring omissions, what else am I supposed to think? I don't take anything at face value.

I don't doubt that there are many SS miscarriages of justice where children are placed at risk, or removed from their parents wholly without foundation, and on the basis of very dodgy evidence indeed. We know there are - these things frequently get an airing in the media, usually after the parent has been absolved of any wrong-doing.

However, I am also equally sure that for every one of those there are probably a hundred people busy waging war with SS over procedure, semantics, technicalities, alleged lies, points of law etc, whilst being TOTALLY AND UTTERLY in denial about the part they have played in why their children are deemed to be at risk in the first place.