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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To be really bloody annoyed with my colleague? Long rant.

49 replies

redrubyshoes · 12/12/2012 19:50

He lives abroad and commutes to work living in the UK during the week and flying home at the weekend. Nice guy and misses his family.

For MONTHS he has been asking for an invite to eat one evening at my house and we have booked and rearranged it three times (because he couldn't make that date or this date etc). He insisted that he wanted to eat certain things because he eats hotel food five days a week. Basically home cooking at my place.

Fine.

DH was sorry for the guy and understood as he has also been in that situation.

Finally a date was agreed on and I told him I had sourced the food he wanted, spent the weekend cleaning the house, making up the spare room, choosing wine and cooked until 11pm on Monday night so everything would be ready for supper at 8pm last night. I finish work at 6pm so would not have had time to cook everything in time (including baking bread).

Fine.

He texted to cancel at 7.15pm as he was "tired from meetings he had been too." Shock Forty five minutes bloody notice.

I told him this morning I thought it was just bloody rude and he has blanked me all day.

It was HIS idea. HE INSISTED HE WANTED TO COME ROUND! FFS

Tell me to get some bricks, build a bridge and get over it!

OP posts:
LauriesFairyonthetreeeatsCake · 12/12/2012 19:52

What a relief!

Now you never have to do that again, never have to invite him again - AND you got to eat the nice food (though you went to too much trouble).

OldLadyKnowsNothing · 12/12/2012 19:53

I don't think you should get over it, that really was outstandingly bad behaviour on his part, and he should consider the offer perpetually rescinded.

Wankpot. Angry

Hope you enjoyed eating it anyway. :)

pleasethanks · 12/12/2012 19:53

YANBU. I would be livid. Fair enough he may be tired, but that really is not reason enough to cancel. He is the one BU (especially for the incorrect use of "too"!

degutastic · 12/12/2012 19:55

wankpot

sniggers, great word Xmas Grin I'd say it pretty much sums up your colleague too...

MrsKeithRichards · 12/12/2012 20:00

You spent a whole weekend cleaning your house?

Wow!

That'll be it ready for Christmas at least.

bradyismyfavouritewiseman · 12/12/2012 20:00

YANBU I would text back 'what a coincidence, I am really tired from shopping for you and cooking for you and getting the house ready for your visit.'

HollyBerryBush · 12/12/2012 20:01

I think you were cool, calm and collected - I think I would have been acutely ruder than you were.

Original poster
redrubyshoes · 12/12/2012 20:01

I actually think he was contractually obliged to turn up. I have had literally DOZENS of emails from him drooling over the food 'he was sooo looking forward to'.

OP posts:
Anniegetyourgun · 12/12/2012 20:04

Well he's bloody missed out on it now, hasn't he? Forever, I hope.

Original poster
redrubyshoes · 12/12/2012 20:06

MrsKeith

I love cooking and entertaining and put a lot of thought and effort into it. You are welcome anytime, I love having people round. Smile

What the heck you are all invited as you sound like you would appreciate it!

OP posts:
squeakytoy · 12/12/2012 20:06

I would take him his dinner into work tomorrow, and make him eat it for lunch, while you stand over him! Grin

YANBU at all, that is just bloody rude!

ENormaSnob · 12/12/2012 20:09

He is very very rude.

You were not rude enough in response Grin

PurpleTinsel · 12/12/2012 20:10

YANBU.

That is bloody rude. I wouldn't be inviting him around for dinner ever again.

ChrisCringleCadleCrap · 12/12/2012 20:10

arf @ "sourced the food". What did you cook that needed sourcing rather than buying? Grin

He was bloody rude. YANBU

Hegsy · 12/12/2012 20:14

YASooooNBU. What a knobber

Original poster
redrubyshoes · 12/12/2012 20:15

He actually texted me halfway through the evening to bring him the leftovers for him today!

Chris

Try finding a haggis in central France - that is 'sourcing' food. Try asking for 'haggis' in the local butcher here. Grin

OP posts:
AfterEightMintyy · 12/12/2012 20:16

I think it all sounds utterly strange. Why on earth had a meal at your house become such a big thing, for both of you?

lovelyladuree · 12/12/2012 20:19

YANBU. What a selfish Scottish twat he is.

LRDtheFeministDude · 12/12/2012 20:20

Are you sure you weren't both working each other up into a pitch of excitement about something neither of you were that enthused about? Sounds like you felt you had to go to bizarre lengths to feed him a special meal in a super-clean house, and he felt he had to enthuse oddly by dozens of emails. Maybe it's good he didn't make it?!

Cantbelieveitsnotbutter · 12/12/2012 20:21

RUDE!
Loving the lunch idea

NatashaBee · 12/12/2012 20:28

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Original poster
redrubyshoes · 12/12/2012 20:28

LRD

Good point. We entertain a lot and I love to cook and our guest room is lovely but DH and I have been working a lot lately and it was (I thought) a lovely reason to have a good clean and get out the good wine and iron the tablecloth.

I am gathering bricks to build the bridge to get over it...................but for him to blank me today..........................strewth...............

Lovely

He is actually Hungarian Smile

OP posts:
Snazzyfeelingfestive · 12/12/2012 20:32

Very rude to cancel so late for anything though unless it's sudden severe illness. So I wouldn't invite him again.

LRDtheFeministDude · 12/12/2012 20:33

I should say, he is still being incredibly rude! Obviously.

redexpat · 12/12/2012 20:49

You snooze, you lose.

What a dick.