Not to want anti rape adverts

[Startail]

On a normally entirely suitable for small DCs free PC games site.

The DDs have messed about on zylom.com for as long as we have had a PC ie about 10 years.

DD2 (11) has a cold so she's playing sitting on my knee being huggy, when the pre game ad comes on.

It's shows a young couple kissing and then him clearly having sex with her and her telling him to stop. You then see him looking in on himself realising what he's doing and the home office logo comes up.

DD knows the facts of life and was just a bit shocked as she said that's ok for me now, (she spends her life geting SIMs PG), but not when I was 6!

I assume that's the ad that's been on TV a fair amount recently? It's a good ad, and I hope it will be effective, but I'd feel v. uncomfortable if my ddtwins had seen it before they moved up to Big School. It was weird enough watching it with them (they're 14 now) on E4, after the 9 pm watershed the other night.

I don't know Zylom - is is specifically for primary age or more just suitable for everyone?

I know plenty of 12yo who WERE having sex, and the teenage years are the worst for feeling under pressure to give in. I dont think it is a bad thing for her to see at the age of 11.

At 6 it is more than likely to just fly over a childs head anyway, so I really wouldnt be too worried about it.

I think it's important to show these adds, teens & pre-teens especially need to see it due to peer pressure put on them to have sex and littleones don't an eyelid to it anyway.

If these ads save someone from being raped, i'm all for them.

Looking at that site, I don't think it is a childrens' site as such.

No I don't think it is a children site as such, lots of kids stuff plus office /SAHM bored adult time wasters.

Not, despite the fact they are also running an ad for a horrible 18 zombie game, the sort of site you would expect 13-21 year olds to be using. The DFS sofa ad seemed nearer the mark.

It just surprised me as I haven't played on it for ages and the ads are new to me. I was slightly annoyed as it was a site I'd have felt safe recommending to people.

DD2 has had a pretty much unfiltered lap top since she was 7, so I'm sure she's seen lots of things she shouldn't, but the rape ad still surprised her.

Try installing adblock, that should get rid of them.

agree zombies sound worse.
why 'unfiltered laptop' out of interest?

I don't think web filters work very well. I have had ad blocks on mine, but firefox keeps updating and less and less people use flash, so they have mostly stopped working.

Yes you can block chat sites, which she wouldn't use as she knows the lap goes if she does and she isn't going to go looking for porn.

A small girl isn't going to google sex, or follow those sorts of links.
She knows the facts of life, anything dodgy shed just close. She'd just not be interested. (Pre pubescent boys might be, but just like with grow women I don't think most girls would be).

Most unfortunate stuff that DD sees is stupid videos on Utube, which I did used to censor and things that appear on perfectly innocent image searches which I doubt net nannying soft wear would spot.

In the end given mobile phones, tablets and friends computers I think we have to trust our children. I know she has used FB at a friends and much as I hate it I know I can't stop her.

She gets hours of fun watching pop videos and finding hair styles. The latter do a great deal of good, because much as DD2 would like to tease her uncool dyslexic big sister, they are happy to spend ages braiding each others hair.

The "naughty one" with computers is her big sister watching post watershed vampire things and Touchwood. She also watches lots of science and history stuff too, so again I can't moan very loudly.

I'm just glad I don't have boys who want COD and the like. Then I would be pulling plugs.

You are way off the mark. I got up to some pretty dodgy shit online at 13.

This is very important actually. Even at her age. From a very personal experience which I won't go into. I wish I was more knowledgable at that age.

It sounds like the problem is/ are the sites and your non use of filters.

Not a site you would filter.
It's one they have used for years.

Video ads everywhere are much more common than they used to be.

more band with I guess and less flash which is easy to block.

I do because scrolling ads drive me mad.

As for filtering, the only thing I truly don't like are chat rooms and Facebook (which is banned until she 13 and forever if I get my choice)

Big sister isn't interested, I'm glad to say.

Mind you DCs can be stupid just given Email. I'm quite sure her friend posting accusations about someone (full name) to a large group mailing list was pretty dim.

We live in the sort of rural area where family, social and work ties mean gossip finds it's way back to the person being gossiped about.

I have to admit, as my 12yo's is still up at 9.20 - they put that advert on mainstream TV last night, in the middle of a fairly innocuous family viewing programme. I know someone is going to tell me it is past the watershed, but my 12yo is no where near the emotional age for that sort of discussion.

I understand the necessity for it, and that it is quite probably aimed at 15/16/17 through early 20's on the perils of alcohol and violent sex

Early 20s?

I'm 22. I know what rape is, even if the man is your boyfriend.

That advert is not aimed at my age group.

"Violent sex"

1. 'm at bit at those saying their children have free reign of the internet/ watch after watershed tv and then complaining that they are seeing unsuitable things

Rape is shocking

I think if the adds are getting the message out there, a few uncomfortable pre-teens is a small price to pay

It's not about 'the perils of alcohol and violent sex' It's the first time the emphasis has ever been on the perpetrater stopping what he is doing. Instead of the victim modifying.herself to avoid being raped

It is a.monumental advert

There is immense pressure for young girls to have sex

There was even when I was young. I was violated by a boyfriend aged 14, but got away that time before he actually raped me. I was actually raped by a different boyfriend aged 16. The add is definitely not aimed at early 20 year ilds, and with good reason

YY Trapclap.

HollyBerryBush - that is absolutely not the point of it.

Considering what's been said, I think it shows it's needed.

I'm much more about post watershed TV for a pre-teen not emotionally mature enough for that ad, as you never know what will be on regardless of the suitability of the main programme, and completely free web access. I trust my kids, I don't trust everyone on the internet, my children are bright and switched on but don't have the life experience to navigate the wilds of the internet frankly.
So YABU.

Trapclap - I'm sorry you had to go through that.
I missed your second post as I was typing. Couldn't agree with you more if you paid me.

Early 20's?! I'm 22 and please be assured that I'm fully informed of rape as are all of my peers. I would add that I was at 16,17,18 also.
I would Say that It's the under 16 year olds that this is aimed for. 12 year olds included. This is where pressure and puberty most commonly kick in.

You're way off the mark wrt ages. Some 12 year olds will be having sex regularly. Just because your eldest isn't interested don't therefore assume your youngest isn't.
Also don't assume that its just boys that are interested in weird sexual things online, they're just as fascinating to girls. Porn, strange sites etc all get looked at by curious girls too. If you looked at me and my friends age 12 you'd never have thought of te things we were googling!

YABU. That advert is specifically aimed at youngsters. And given the research that prompted it which said one third of teenagers have experienced some form of sexual violence with a partner I think its a bloody good job the government are taking it so seriously.

And I think its right that the anti-rape advert is more shocking than the Zombie-U one. Rape is more shocking than a mere video game.

Actually I'm really fucking angry at this post. How naive are you? Are you talking to your kids about safe and consensual sex at all? Safe internet practices?

You let your daughter have a totally unfiltered laptop since age 7, so "you're sure she's seen loads of stuff". Yeah, she probably has seen some really nasty fucking stuff, if only by accident. You don't even know what she's clicking on, or who she's speaking to. And now, despite giving her unfettered access to an internet full of depravity and dickheads you're concerned about a brilliant advert that should be shown to all high school kids to get the point across?

Seriously, there are worse corners of the internet than that advert. You are doing your daughter a disservice by naively assuming she would never click on anything rude, or naughty, or see things you'd rather she didn't at her age. Girls go through puberty just like boys, girls will experiment just like boys. She may very well have never seen anything dodgy on the internet, but if you're not even talking to her to find out then how will you ever know?

Get a grip and talk to your daughter about keeping safe, in real life and online. She has a two in three chance of being that girl in the advert. Shocking her into thinking about this might mean it was the best advert she's seen all week.

She'd just not be interested. (Pre pubescent boys might be, but just like with grow women I don't think most girls would be).

Um. Seriously? No. Some children, early teens will be interested and google crap, some won't. Gender is somewhat irrelevant.