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AIBU?

to have fed my baby here?

999 replies

ariane5 · 03/12/2012 11:08

Went shopping yesteerday.ds1. Jas a blu badge so we parked in a disabled space.went to shops and back to car couple of hours later. We have 4 dcs and the baby 7 mths started screaming and was hungry.by then the car park was packd. I started to feed ds while dh got other dcs in car and an elderly couple drove past and politely asked if we were leaving, dh said sorry not yet then 2 other drivers did the same but the fourth stopped got out and said please could we hurry up, I explained that when I had fed ds we would be going but she was really angry and said a disabled space is not just for sitting in that we should go immediately. I was only another ten mins fding ds it is hard enough going out as all dcs have same condition and ds2 was really screaming I had to feed him as it was a long drive home. Was I being unreasonable?

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SixFeetUnder · 03/12/2012 12:38

YANBU you were using the space and that's all there is to it.
You did the right thing being up and out early to ensure you would get the space you needed so you wouldn't need to deal with any more unnecessary stress when you are already aware of how difficult getting out and about can be for you.
As others have said, OK to ask if you're leaving, not OK to get huffy about it.

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sashh · 03/12/2012 12:44

YANBU

Let me guess, the last car was an older couple.

Don't you know that Blue Badges are pensioner prizes, they get them from living to old age. It gives them a right to complain about anyone under 60 using it.

As for a child! well how dare someone have a disability as a child.

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ariane5 · 03/12/2012 12:47

Yes they were an older couple but to be fair so were the first (v polite) people that asked

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ariane5 · 03/12/2012 12:48

Yes they were an older couple but to be fair so were the first (v polite) people that asked

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takataka · 03/12/2012 12:48

thats a bit ageist sash Shock

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threesocksfullofchocs · 03/12/2012 12:50

it doesn't matter if they were old or young, you cannot use a BB bay just to sit in.
I would have asked you to move too.

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BuntysFestiveCollocks · 03/12/2012 12:51

could you not have breastfed while DH drove the car?

Apart from it being ILLEGAL to not have a child in a car seat in a moving car, what part of you thinks that breastfeeding in a car is a good idea?

OP, YANBU. You have a disabled badge, you can use the space any way you please as far as I'm aware.

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threesocksfullofchocs · 03/12/2012 12:54

I think you will find that you can use the BB if the person with the BB is getting out.
so if the person with the BB is sitting in the car they should move.

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Pandemoniaa · 03/12/2012 12:55

it doesn't matter if they were old or young, you cannot use a BB bay just to sit in.

Who says? I don't think that any legislation has yet been re-enacted that suggests one is now prohibited to sit in one's Blue Badged car in a Blue Badge space. Let alone sit in the car in order to do something as essential as feed a baby.

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threesocksfullofchocs · 03/12/2012 12:56

well will hide the thread now as IMO the op should have moved to an ordinary space.

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Pandemoniaa · 03/12/2012 12:57

That's your opinion though, isn't it? Not a legal direction.

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MistressIggi · 03/12/2012 12:58

Really threesocks? What if the disabled driver of a car needs to sit still for five minutes to get their breath back after a shopping trip, before heading off on a motorway? Is there a rule saying that's not allowed?
The people asking weren't concerned about the rights and wrongs of it, they just wanted to get a space and get in to the shops. They weren't going in and demanding others with cars parked there hurried up and got out!

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ariane5 · 03/12/2012 13:03

There was no other space to move to threesocks it was absolutely packed.

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ariane5 · 03/12/2012 13:03

There was no other space to move to threesocks it was absolutely packed.

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valiumredhead · 03/12/2012 13:03

Actually there is something in the rules that come with the blue badge iirc BUT it's about the owner of the BB not being allowed just to sit in the car while some one else goes off to do the shopping.

But this wasn't the case as everyone was in the car, driver and bb holder.

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Hopeforever · 03/12/2012 13:04

YANBU, there was no other option. The other people who wanted that space had no more right to it than you.

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gail734 · 03/12/2012 13:06

A BFing woman in a blue-badged car, parked in a disabled spot? That is a political-correctness nightmare just waiting to happen! The woman who challenged you must have been insane. As far as I'm concerned, a breastfeeding mum is sacred and can do her thing anytime, anywhere and people should praise her lavishly while she's doing it. But then, I'm a breastfeeding mum! When I, very occasionally and very discreetly, BF in public, I mentally dare anyone to challenge me. I would savage them!

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SamSmalaidh · 03/12/2012 13:09

YANBU, I don't see what better options there were anyway.

If you'd fed the baby before you got in the car, then you'd still have been taking up the space.

If you'd got all the children out of the car and gone back in the shopping centre to feed the baby (so as to avoid sitting in a car Hmm) you'd have occupied the space for at least twice as long.

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Shelby2010 · 03/12/2012 13:11

YANBU

Much quicker to feed the baby in the car, than the alternative of getting all the DCs out & going to a cafe etc

The drivers wanting the space were NBU to ask if you were leaving but were U to get stroppy. In fact if you are in Scotland it would be a criminal offence to try & stop you feeding your baby.

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notso · 03/12/2012 13:13

I don't think YABU but I can see how it would be annoying to others in a busy car park, doesn't excuse the rudeness though.

On another note I cannot see how anyone could BF while their baby is strapped into a car seat. My poor old breasts are particularly saggy after four DC and they won't reach, I have tried!

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baublesandbaileys · 03/12/2012 13:17

"On another note I cannot see how anyone could BF while their baby is strapped into a car seat. My poor old breasts are particularly saggy after four DC and they won't reach, I have tried!"

you have to loosen your belt and lean over them, its not safe! god knows what your body would do to the baby in an impact as you are not properly belted in even though the clasp is still in IYKWIM. Have done it when stuck but its not something I'd recommend

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Goldmandra · 03/12/2012 13:21

I just wanted to reinforce the message about not moving the car while someone is breastfeeding or holding a baby on their lap.

Once the engine is switched on the airbag is activated. It can only take a tiny bump to set the airbag off. The car could be going very slowly and everyone else may be totally unaffected but the baby may well be dead. Airbags explode with a dangerous force.

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diddl · 03/12/2012 13:24

Well if everyone was back in the car ready to depart, then in effect the disabled space was no longer needed.

But, if there´s nowhere else to park-there isn´t.

It´s all very well saying go off to find somewhere-you could have travvelled half/all the way home with a screaming baby by that time!

I´m sure if OP could have given up the space she would.

I´ve bfed & we´ve all had lunch in a parking space before-maybe when you pay no one cares how long you stayHmm

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RyleDup · 03/12/2012 13:27

YANBU. You could have sat in the cafe and taken longer to get back, or you could have sat in your car. All other people need to know is that the space isn't free yet. And I wouldn't have fed the baby while dh was driving either. Are people insane? All for the sake of ten minutes for a space that isn't free yet. My dh is a blue badge holder, he wouldn't dream of asking someone, who has a blue badge, that is sitting in their car feeding their baby to move. I wouldn't dream of asking either. I'd just wait or keep driving round until something came up.

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GlaikitFizzogTheChristmasElf · 03/12/2012 13:28

You still pay for disabled parking at my shopping centre. Is that unusual? It's not a council car park.

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