to have fed my baby here?

[ariane5]

Went shopping yesteerday.ds1. Jas a blu badge so we parked in a disabled space.went to shops and back to car couple of hours later. We have 4 dcs and the baby 7 mths started screaming and was hungry.by then the car park was packd. I started to feed ds while dh got other dcs in car and an elderly couple drove past and politely asked if we were leaving, dh said sorry not yet then 2 other drivers did the same but the fourth stopped got out and said please could we hurry up, I explained that when I had fed ds we would be going but she was really angry and said a disabled space is not just for sitting in that we should go immediately. I was only another ten mins fding ds it is hard enough going out as all dcs have same condition and ds2 was really screaming I had to feed him as it was a long drive home. Was I being unreasonable?

[diddl]

OP say that there were no spaces to move to.

[ariane5]

The car park was full.NO disabled or non disabled spaces at all.traffic backed up with people driving round looking for spaces it was either stay in space or drive home and the baby was just too hungry and screaming.

[ariane5]

The car park was full.NO disabled or non disabled spaces at all.traffic backed up with people driving round looking for spaces it was either stay in space or drive home and the baby was just too hungry and screaming.

[merrymouse]

No, as others have said, you wouldn't have been taking up less of a car parking space by sitting in a cafe feeding.

You aren't in a position to judge whether somebody else would have been more or less in need of the space for whatever reason - that's not how disabled badges work ("Before occupying this space, please fill in this form detailing your disabilities and the reason for your journey, you will be called back to your car should a more deserving driver require it...") .

However, I think waiting for 10 minutes, rather than attempting to drive a car out of a crowded car park with a screaming baby and 3 children with their own difficulties was much the most sensible decision.

[Rudolphstolemycarrots]

you are entitled to use the space - can't see the problem.

[NolittleBuddahsorTigerMomshere]

As a lifelong permanent wheelchair user, I think YWBVVVU and possibly a little bit PLB, surely the baby could have waited for a few minutes to feed whilst you moved somewhere else. (I presume you would not BF when standing in the middle of the road) As for your comments about people ONLY waiting to do their shopping, how do you know? They could have needed the loo (I have been this person), and depending on their disability they may not have been able to wait long, or perhaps they needed to take medication-- which cannot wait in certain cases. Moreover, contrary to popular belief, not all disabled people 'look' disabled, so saying you would have moved if someone needed it does Not make it reasonable. IMO you should have known and behaved better, seeing as your DS has SN.

[Goldmandra]

OP I think you just learned a valuable lesson here.

Don't put yourself in a position where people feel free to judge you. I am sure that plenty of people with blue badges go to shopping centres on busy days and sit around having a drink or a sandwich in a coffee shop. Following the logic of previous posters this is unacceptable and any drinks or food should be taken and consumed elsewhere in case another person entitled to the accessible parking space comes along.

Your only mistake was to be feeding your baby in a place where people would see you and feel entitled to expect you to move.

Next time go back into the shopping centre and find a nice coffee shop where you can feed in comfort while having a cuppa. It will make you take up the space for longer but nobody will judge you for it.

[ariane5]

Iam very well aware that not all people look disabled as my own dcs do notlook 'ill'.I do not understand your comparison to me bf in the car to somebody bf in middle of road?

[ariane5]

Iam very well aware that not all people look disabled as my own dcs do notlook 'ill'.I do not understand your comparison to me bf in the car to somebody bf in middle of road?

[SamSmalaidh]

What does "PLB" mean?

To be honest, I don't think a hungry 7 month old necessarily can wait 20 minutes to to fed if they're distressed. I would expect an adult (even a disabled one) to be able to wait 10 minutes for a parking space. If the car park was busy then not everyone was going to get a space anyway, even if the OP wasn't there.

[NolittleBuddahsorTigerMomshere]

OP, my point was simply that I assumed that you would be happy for your baby to wait for however long it took you to cross the road, so why could they not wait for you to move the car to a different spot. Goldmandra, your points are ridiculous, people consuming food and sitting for a time in places where they have paid to do so are using the service to which the carparking facilities are attached, as OP was when she was shopping, but not when she was feeding the baby. Anyhow, I still think OP was BVVU and should have known better. I assume OP would have been very angry had your Dss had any embarrassment/ indignity if they hadn't been able to use the loo when needed or problems from not being able to take or recieve meds when needed.

[Offred]

If you needed the loo that desperately. you'd have to be extremely stupid to go into the multi storey car park of a shopping centre....

[MistressIggi]

Some people clearly have never been in a multi-storey carpark. Where is there to just move over to to have the feed? And those who persist in saying move to another parking space, need to read the thread.

[SamSmalaidh]

NolittleBuddhas - there were no other spaces If it had been the case that the OP simply had to move a few feet away into another space I'm sure she would have. Her only alternative in the situation to feeding in the car would have been getting all the children out, back into the shopping centre and feeding the baby there, thus taking up the space for even longer. Would you have preferred that?

[LynetteScavo]

YANBU.

If you had fed the baby around the corner, or simply spent longer in the shops your car would have still been parked there, and people wouldn't have been able to give you grief.

It makes no difference that you were in a BB space. If someone had got angry with you for feeding in an ordinary space, that would have been just as bad.

[MistressIggi]

Nolittlebuddha perhaps the OP and her family had better just stay at home in case someone with more needs wants to park?

[MrsHoarder]

But the op could easily have fed the baby on a bench/chair in the shops. Would probably have been harder for everyone including the dcs with disabilities.

And big shopping centres near motorways often take you straight from your parking spot and try to feed you away from any chance to stop asap. So moving the car might not be trivial if there's no nearby obvious spaces.

[BigBirdisSaved]

YANBU as others have said, you could have sat BF somewhere other than the car and they still wouldn't have had your space.

[MistressIggi]

Goldmandra - exactly.

[BigBirdisSaved]

having a pop at a woman feeding her baby in a car is pretty shite if you ask me

ITA

[ariane5]

I should have known better?... Actually I think I did quite well in anticipating that there may be an issu with parking this near to xmas that's why we planned our trip and struggled to get 4 dcs with health issues up early enough to ensure we got a space and trust me it was HARD (that's why we don't go to places like that often). It is not my fault if other pople got there when it was full?? And crossing th road takes a minute-driving the baby home would have taken us 25 mins assuming there was no traffic then it could be longer.Iam not heartless I do really know how hard it is whn you cannot get a space and really need one.I do not really want to go into medical histories but I can sympathise as myself and dh also have the genetic condition dcs have (although not as sverly-they are badly affected as sadly inherited from both of us but that's a long story).

[BegoniaBampot]

YANBU if there were no spaces anywhere else to move to. Don't think this is just a disabled parking space thing, it can be the same with any spaces. Am I the only one who can't help but get annoyed when you're endlessly cruising a busy car park, you finally see someone heading to their car, you indicate, waiting at last for a space and they get in and faff about or start reading their paper without even a nod when they could see you we're waiting. I might be unreasonable but it is bloody annoying.

[LaCiccolina]

This thread is ridiculous and hysterical funny and just hysterical. I can only assume its Christmas nuttery taking hold!!!

Op - not bu, not in the slightest. Ur space. I don't care of the type if space, I think it's pretty irrelevant tbh. Take all the time u want, feed all four and return to the shops whatever.

If any one of these are truly suggesting they would have left it I just don't believe them. Looks good on a post but judging by every car park I've ever entered then possession is law. Ive seen phonecslls taken, dumping bags returning to shops, feeding, takeaway lunches all sorts. if ur in space its urs for the day! End of!

[NolittleBuddahsorTigerMomshere]

plb = Perfect Last Born.

Wtf do you mean by 'even a disabled one' I don't like your tone there at all, and for what it's worth I and many others with limited bladder sensation/ control would not be able to wait for anything like 20mins to use the loo, yes adults BTW I didn't say that I expected a baby to wait 20 mins for anything at any point.

[SamSmalaidh]

Good point, they could have easily just been feeding the baby in the privacy of the car and then going back in to continue shopping/have lunch.