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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To not send Christmas Cards

129 replies

crimbo12 · 28/11/2012 13:18

So I am faced with a list of about 50 family, aquaintances, old colleagues etc. My only communication with these people is by Xmas cards each year. Each year I get increasingly irritated by this process, the cost and waste of paper. Even with close friends and family I can give a personal Greeting (and sometimes even a drink!) so why do I also send them a bit of cardboard to put on a shelf.

So what would you think if you received a card with this message
"Crimbo and Family have decided this will be the last year we send Cards at Christmas. If you would like to send us your email address we will send Seasons Greetings this way in future. If you prefer not to then be assured you will be in our thoughts during the Festive Season"

I may or may not be brave enough to actually do this

OP posts:
ReshapeWhileDamp · 29/11/2012 17:28

But I really like sending them. Sad I love choosing them, depending on which charities I want to support that year, I actually like writing a little message in them (I don't send many that just say 'love from Reshape and family') and I love receiving them. We've got so few the last few years that the ones we do get look sparse and mingy when they're blutak'd to the living room door. Sad Maybe I should just ditch the whole thing and save an extra £40 a year.

exoticfruits · 29/11/2012 17:42

I love them- just resent paying all that money on stamps.

Ilovetoread · 29/11/2012 19:23

For the last few years we have emailed everyone and let it be known that we are not sending Christmas cards, preferring instead to give the money to charity (RNLI) in our case. In the New Year we send the money and email everybody with a rough idea of what they could buy ie last year our money was enough to theoretically pay for training for one lifeboat crew and gloves. Much better than paper that gets recycled (Must confess I am a bah-humbug where all cards are concerned, much rather money for card and stamp was given to charity!)

wonderingsoul · 29/11/2012 20:19

i only get dc one and parents.

im saving the trees!

NanaNina · 29/11/2012 22:55

I think Christmas cards originally were sent to people who you seldom saw, but now it has got out of hand in my view. I'm sending them this year but with a note "This is the last year I am sending cards but will keep in touch with special friends and family - you know who you are! I shan't put the notice in older members of the family and friends and family who I seldom see. I like to write something in cards, not just From "N and R" Happy Christmas and I hate those that say "we must meet up in the New Year" and we never do!!

I don't like getting them either - they just lie on the shelf and then get re-cycled at WH Smith or wherever - used to put them up when the kids were young but now it's just us I CBArsed!

I' d much rather hear about Round Robins though cus I hate those too but love having a good laugh over them. We don't get any but my cousin gets 2 or 3 and it's a treat after christmas when she brings them round and we fall about laughing at some of them. She gets one from someone she worked with about 30 years ago and she has not got a clue who he is talking about; she barely remembers him which makes it all the funnier!

Mum2Luke · 29/11/2012 23:17

I generally only send Christmas cards to family who are not local or who live abroad and who I don't see but think about at this time of year. I really do not see the point of writing loads of cards out to people I see all the time, I would ratyher give my money to a more worthy cause - at the moment I am organising a donation day of toys for the local radio station's Mission Christmas to give to kids who won't otherwise get a present. I think many kids just get far too many toys and am trying to encourage my 10 yr old to give toys rather than ask for expensive things which he won't be getting anyway.

surfingbabies · 30/11/2012 00:03

I don't send them & never have, I donate to charity instead.....if I ever find myself in an awkward situation where I feel someone is expecting a card I tell them which charity we've pick this yr & why, I say it very confident with a big smile Grin
This yrs a hard one for us though as we're not buying presents and I'm a little unsure how to tell people!! Any advice?? Smile

lovebunny · 30/11/2012 00:26

re the o p, make your email a bit softer and send it. its an invitation to people to be in touch. i like it.

ProphetOfDoom · 30/11/2012 13:47

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

MrsMelons · 30/11/2012 13:59

We stopped sending the bulk of our cards a couple of years ago as MIL was diagnosed with cancer so we did a Macmillan e-card. I just posted cards to older family members and gave special cards to immediate family.

This year both DCs are at school and I am a mug for buying anything they have made so have ended up buying both of their xmas cards they have made (I have 72 in total) so I am going to have to write them now, bribe the kids to write their names in them and remember to post them!

I may go back to the e-cards next year if it all goes wring.

MrsDeVere · 30/11/2012 14:10

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

BegoniaBampot · 30/11/2012 14:21

Is it a bit weird that I hate sending cards, the cost, the waste, the fact it's expected etc. But - I'd probably feel a bit sad to look round and realise I hadn't got many given to us? Suppose for many it's often the only time they keep a slim contact with an old acquaintance, friend or family member. never understand folk spending a fortune on really fancy cards though. But I'm like that with any kind of cards.

chocoluvva · 30/11/2012 14:35

Not weird IMO - that's exactly how I feel.

BegoniaBampot · 30/11/2012 14:37

That's why I like FB. I can keep that little contact with those far away and catch a little peep into their lives. Could always wish them a Happy Christmas on FB instead of sending cards I suppose.

BegoniaBampot · 30/11/2012 14:39

Would rather give the money I'd spend on cards to charity. Would still send to older people, especially those on their own or that who might appreciate the card more.

Chottie · 30/11/2012 19:15

I love sending and receiving Christmas cards. The pile of cards on the mat when I get home from work with cheery messages and personal updates is just lovely to open. I spend a lot of time and trouble selecting cards and writing them. I only buy charity Christmas cards, there is a lovely selection in my local library.

quirrelquarrel · 30/11/2012 19:35

In school I stopped around Year 9 because I was too scared to give them to people, haven't given them since. I think I have to start this year. But not that many, max ten!

Wordsmith · 19/12/2012 10:24

I like sending Christmas cards; I like receiving them too. I like keeping in touch with people - anyone who sees my FB page can see that! BUT this year although I have bought cards (from Oxfam) I am not going to be sending them. We are trying to spend less this Christmas - just buy for the kids and not each other - and when I totted up that it would cost £30 just for the stamps to send cards to people I didn't really know and hadn't seen for 20 years, plus would take about 4 hours of time that could be spent on more worthwhile activities, I decided not to do it this year. I will write a few that I can hand-deliver, but that's it. I keep in touch with people all year round. I also support Martin Lewis's campaign to stop people spending money they can't afford on presents that people simply don't want. The madness has to stop somewhere.

nurseneedshelp · 19/12/2012 10:25

I've not sent cards for about 5 years! Waste of time and money!

Ivanda · 20/12/2012 14:12

Hi All :) I love sending Christmas cards and I even made all (yes ALL of them!! 36) this year - beautiful mulberry paper designs involving lovely paints, robins, gold thread and time/effort and care...starting in September...I made them for family, friends and then thought what the heck..made them for colleagues at work too...(hmmmmmm!! I hear you all say...!!)

However, it filled up dull moments as I enjoyed it so much - couldnt wait to give them out too...

However..Im a bit down now - whereas people said they "loved" the originality/prettiness and care.. a) I hardly got any given to me myself or b)I got hastily scribbled on cheap paper ugly ones left at the end of box for non-special people (I over heard a co-worker sighing as she wrote these out for us 'non-special' people)...

I feel silly and annoyed with myself too. I loved making them. I loved giving them. But I feel hurt about the lack of effort from others. Maybe I'm just a stupid fool? Will someone please say something wise to me please!

Thanks and Seasonal Greetings xx

Pom2000 · 13/01/2019 10:25

I love receiving Christmas cards and enjoy displaying them. Apart from a Christmas tree, they are my Christmas decorations and I love looking at them and knowing that person has thought of me. I am also very conscious of when I've not received a card from a friend and find I'm a wee bit upset especially as the friends concerned are not short of a bob or two! It does rather suggest that they can't be bothered or feel it's not necessary because they see me regularly. Where has the joy gone? It does appear to be a bit 'bah humbug' and hardly in keeping with the spirit of Christmas. My friends mean a lot to me and it's still quite exciting to hear the cards drop through the letterbox onto the mat and the feeling of anticipation before opening them. I would hate to see this die out.

H03bags · 02/12/2021 10:23

I am not doing them, it's a faff I have no time for. I know what everyone has been doing throughout the year anyway. I will reply to anyone who sends one saying thank you but that I don't do them. Sorted.

VestaTilley · 02/12/2021 10:31

Zombie thread alert!

FluffyBooBoo · 02/12/2021 10:31

I haven't sent cards in years.

I would be delighted.

FluffyBooBoo · 02/12/2021 10:32

@VestaTilley

Zombie thread alert!
Damn!