To not send Christmas Cards

[crimbo12]

So I am faced with a list of about 50 family, aquaintances, old colleagues etc. My only communication with these people is by Xmas cards each year. Each year I get increasingly irritated by this process, the cost and waste of paper. Even with close friends and family I can give a personal Greeting (and sometimes even a drink!) so why do I also send them a bit of cardboard to put on a shelf.

So what would you think if you received a card with this message
"Crimbo and Family have decided this will be the last year we send Cards at Christmas. If you would like to send us your email address we will send Seasons Greetings this way in future. If you prefer not to then be assured you will be in our thoughts during the Festive Season"

I may or may not be brave enough to actually do this

[SleepBeckons]

The whole card-thing at Christmas is a nightmare. I've always been really conscientious about writing cards for all and sundry but then I realized people were sending me cards because they'd received one from me .... so I was creating a cycle that only Royal Mail seemed to be profiting from

Now, I send about a dozen cards to family, and send to friends after I've received one. This has saved me a fortune in postage stamps

So many ways to keep in touch nowadays ....

[AngelPup]

I really don't think it matters a jot whether you send cards, don't send cards, give a donation to charity or not. The main thing is that whatever you do, you do it with goodwill and not begrudgingly. If Christmas cards become an irritant then don't send them. If buying lots of people Christmas presents becomes a chore, then don't do it! I used to buy friends presents but it just went a bit mad so I told them I was stopping. They understood. They are my friends afterall! it doesn't mean I like them any less. Certainly, it is always good to think about how our money is best spent as Babybythesea has done.

For the record, I have friends who tell me they are giving to charity rather than giving cards and that is great. I like to find out about the various charities they support. I don't think badly of them for telling me.

Babybythesea...thank you for informing me of the John Lewis Christmas Refuge list...I shall find out more about that as it sounds worthwhile.

Personally, I have bought cards directly from a charity this year which I guess kills two birds with one stone... However, I would not hesitate to stop sending cards if at any point I found it irritating. So, Crimbo12 ...do not worry about what other people think of you...you know what feels right to you and people will understand (and will probably follow suit..it often takes one person to do what everyone else would like to do!)

[Rudolphstolemycarrots]

What about 'we are planning to be very Eco and just send email Xmas cards next year, so let us know your email address'

[mercury7]

I've not sent cards for several years, the whole bleeding shebang gets on my tits

[RichManPoorManBeggarmanThief]

I dont mind not getting Christmas cards but I frikkin' hate ecards. They're so toxic. Everyone knows people only send them because they cant be arsed to spend 30 seconds writing a proper one but want to retain the "friend credit"

[NorksAreTinselly]

Not a single solitary one.
It's great

I look back on the person who used to MAKE Christmas cards for 50 people who didn't really care and can't believe she was really me. The twit.

• My friends and relatives know I don't send them and love me anyway.
  
• People I don't know very well don't need one. If I haven't spoken to them all year, why would I just because it's Christmas.
  
• People I see all the time, I say "Merry Christmas" to the last time I see them before Christmas
  
• Cards from banks and sofa companies go straight in he bin

[JugglingWithPossibilities]

I don't agree that e cards have to be a poor substitute RichMan .... my DC's have enjoyed creating them with eg. a picture of us on a Christmas afternoon walk in the snow, mixed with lots of other Christmassy images DD had found, plus some Photoshop artwork. All very creative and fun ... all I need to do now is compile a group of email addresses and I could be done in one click !

[lotsofdogshere]

I love getting cards from people I don't see much of, and without Christmas cards we possibly would lose touch. I particularly loathe the sanctimonious approach taken by people who email to say they are not sending cards, but are donating money to charity instead. It's so "look at me, aren't I clever and wonderful". Yuk. Scrooge and bah humbug. Give to charity, of course give to charity, but why the need to tell the world that's what you are doing.

[RedHelenB]

Agree with Lots. Christmas cards are a lovely tradition, & a way of keeping in contact with those you don't see very often.

[RosemaryHoyt]

What horrid comments made to babybythesea. It is clearly a big deal to her, chunk out of her budget, giving to charity, regardless of how it comes about is wonderful, especially when everyone's funds are stretched ATM. The announcement may not suit all of you,but all she is saying is 'don't think I don't care about you at Xmas, I do, rather than a pointless bit of waste/card I've donated where (and let's get this straight; it is sorely needed and VERY much appreciated) possible and still let you know I care'.

[Scholes34]

I send cards to friends and relatives I don't see often, ie, those who don't live in my city. I always include a hand-written note. I've started to prune back my list by taking off friends I don't hear from from year to year who simply write "Happy Christmas, love from friends of Scholes" and nothing else.

It would be good if more people pruned back their list. That way they would have more money to spend on decent cards, rather than the rather dubious tacky cheap ones that arrive from people who think I'll want to display in my house over the Christmas period.

[crimbo12]

Thanks everyone- loads of interesting stuff. I personally would never do the "I will send cash to charity instead" thing- a tad holier than thou, and I'm comfortable with our charitable giving already! But it sounds like I'm not alone and maybe I will just cut down to close friends and family to start with and see if anything happens. I have visions of people with those Chrustmas card list books ticking people off as cards come in- ugh!

[AngelPup]

RosemaryHoyt...I agree with you wholeheartedly.

Like some other people, Christmas cards I receive go in the recycling bin, often before Christmas arrives. I have nowhere to put them and if I leave them out my dog will eat them.

I have no idea at all why I continue to send cards...most probably because it is my only contact with people with whom I once had good friendships. Take that away and there wouldn't be any contact at all! Sad really.

Let's not beat ourselves up about what we do or don't do. Life is hard enough without creating additional pressure!

Merry Christmas to one and all! Ho, Ho, Ho!

[JugglingWithPossibilities]

And a Merry Christmas to you too AngelPup

(ooh, I wonder when we'll get Christmas smileys - December perhaps ?)

• I'm doing reciprocal greetings this year

[ThePoppyAndTheIvy]

I send Christmas cards, although the list gets pruned a bit each year.

I like choosing cards, writing them & receiving them from other people I don't normally see very often as most of my friends do a sort of "round robin" thing (which I know some people see as incredibly naff), and I actually like hearing what's happening in people's lives .

And no, it isn't just Christmas that I get in touch with anybody but with my friends living all over the UK, most having DCs, most having jobs and busy lives etc. Christmas does mean that we are getting around to keeping in touch at least once a year! And I couldn't just phone people because I hate using them!

[ThePoppyAndTheIvy]

Hate using phones that should say, not using people!

[NetworkGuy]

"I wouldn't send cards to people I see all the time, but to distant relatives and friends abroad I think it is a nice way to wish them Merry Christmas."

I don't have any friends abroad, and having moved, have seen few of my old friends in the last year.

I will send out just a few cards, to the remaining clients who at least send some work (and eventually cash) my way, but really do buy the cheapest cards from a charity shop (rather than a supermarket, which may pass on a fraction).

A few elderly relatives and my immediate siblings (three retired sisters) + BiLs will get cards, but I don't have addresses for my nephews and niece anyway (some may visit their parents, one is overseas with a baby, another two each have 2 daughters, but in truth I know very little about my niece+nephews' interests, lives, and even less about their children).

Oh yes, and am broke at present, but bought some stamps back in March (tend to invoice clients via e-mail and should be doing that as I type this!).

[fedupwithdeployment]

I am going to be sending quite a few (with photo of DSs inside) but no RR. Can't abide them....but slightly disappointed that the smuggest of smug people who have sent us the most detailed multicoloured smug RR for the past 10 years or so are getting divorced. I mean it is obvioulsy very sad for them, but how sad for us....we have dined out on the awfulness of their RR for 10 years, and now (I strongly suspect) we won't be getting another.

Anyway, my list is pruned each year. But this year I did get a couple of cards from an ex colleague (lovely girl) which made me think that the effort and cost of sending cards is worth it. I was quite touched.

But each to their own.

[Ephiny]

I never send cards. I wouldn't make an announcement though. Just don't do it if you don't want to.

[Kaekae]

I quite like sending cards and I like receiving them. I like putting them up around the house. I don't send that many out but I do like writing them out whilst drinking a glass of Bailey's and eating a mince pie! Sadly my gran passed away this year and I used to without fail get a card from her; always said the exact same tiny message from her inside, feels very empty knowing I won't get a card or be able to send one to her this year.

[stillsmarting]

I keep pruning our Christmas card list, but even so end up sending about 50. I exchange cards with most of our neighbours (small cul de sac) because it oils the wheels of our relationships, and with people who live a long way away, but apart from that I try to avoid sending them to people I see a lot of.
At Church we have one card everyone can sign if they want to with the money going to a charity the church suports.

[JessieMcJessie]

I really hate that thing where people you see very day at work hand you a card and then you have to display it- we are not school kids for goodness sake! I do wish my colleagues a Happy Christmas but never reciprocate (noticed a long time ago that male staff never did...)

[carrie74]

I have a large extended family, located all over the world, and seem to have picked up friends in so many different ways (school, Uni, various jobs, through the children etc), andI like sending them cards and try to write a little something individual in many of them. I don't expect anything back, or keep tabs on who I have or haven't received from. I display the cards we receive on ribbons hung on the backs of our living room doors, and to me, it's part of the decorations.

I'm less enthusiastic about the children doing cards for their friends (which generally means me doing at least some of them), and cards for the (many) people I see every day, and for those I feel obligated to, but at least they're hand delivered, and don't require the heartfelt message inside.