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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to think this teacher was really harsh?

44 replies

freddiefrog · 27/11/2012 13:14

DD is 11 and in year 6 and has had a supply teacher for the last 2 weeks

She gets homework twice a week -

Thursday - a little project which has to be done over the weekend and handed in on a Monday
Monday - numeracy which has to be handed in on Thursdays

As well as daily reading, spelling and times tables revision

So, last week DD was off school sick on Thursday and Friday, first day back yesterday.

I picked her up yesterday, chatting about her day and she tells she was given detention for all of lunch, and 10 stars removed from her chart (they use a reward system where stars they're given stars for good work/being helpful/whatever and at the end of term get to pick out of a lucky dip) for not handing in her weekend homework (she did hand the numeracy sheet in from the Monday)

To be honest, I thought DD had got the wrong end of the stick - she was off sick so hadn't had the homework to do in the first place, but DD was adamant she'd tried to explain she had been ill (which the teacher knew anyway) but her teacher insisted she stay in over lunch and do it then, so I checked with the teacher this morning, and yes, she'd been given detention and lost the stars.

I tried to explain to the teacher myself that DD had been off sick so I thought it was a bit unfair, but she was really dismissive of me too, and refused to reinstate her stars

Is it unreasonable to speak to the head? I hate all this going to the head and making a fuss shennanegans but I think it is really unfair to not get her stars back

If they had given her the homework yesterday, she would have done it last night and handed it in today (which is what I would expect to happen) but she wasn't given the opportunity

OP posts:
squeakytoy · 27/11/2012 13:16

YANBU, if she hadnt been given the homework due to being off sick, then how on earth could she have done it. Yes, it was harsh of the teacher.

Hobbitation · 27/11/2012 13:17

YANBU. Very harsh.

deleted203 · 27/11/2012 13:18

This is completely unreasonable! How on earth was your DD expected to do Thursday's HW for Mon when she hadn't even received it? I would go speak to the head, definitely. I would also complain that the teacher was dismissive towards me. Fancy 'fining' a child 10 stars for being ill, which is what this effectively boils down to.

myBOYSareBONKERS · 27/11/2012 13:18

YANBU - totally unreasonable of the teacher

tethersend · 27/11/2012 13:19

YANBU. Not so much harsh as a load of bollocks. What is she punishing your DD for- being ill or not being psychic?

XBenedict · 27/11/2012 13:19

Terribly unreasonable and I would be bringing this to the attention of the head teacher.

LindyHemming · 27/11/2012 13:21

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

ChaoticismyLife · 27/11/2012 13:21

YANBU Complain to the HT

Original poster
freddiefrog · 27/11/2012 13:22

I think the teacher just cocked up, had forgotten DD was off, then refused to listen to DD or me when we tried to remonstrate with her instead of just saying 'oh, sorry' and giving DD her stars back

She's not our regular teacher and is only there for a couple more weeks.

I'll speak to the head later

OP posts:
Dramajustfollowsme · 27/11/2012 13:26

YANBU - I'm a teacher and under similar circumstances I would have given it out yesterday and asked for it in on Friday. The same time period the other children had.

Mosman · 27/11/2012 13:28

You have to teach the children not give a stuff about stars, if you get them great if you don't nobody died, detention on the other hand I would be furious about but it can't be undone. An apology is owed to your daughter and I'd be making sure she got it.

FellowshipOfFestiveFellows · 27/11/2012 13:29

What a cow! When my dds teacher shouted at her when she wasn't at fault in front of the class I went to the ht and she was made to apologise to dd in front of the class too. Cannot believe they took her lunchtime from her over not doing homework, that would be harsh if she had been at school to receive it. At that age surely the parent would be at fault for not getting the child to do it.
She sounds like a right bully, frankly, and regardless if she forgot, you tried to tell her, and she ignored you as well.

SminkoPinko · 27/11/2012 13:30

another yanbu here. hope the teacher was having a v bad day and this is not her usual modus operandi. if it is she must be a really terrible teacher.

BupcakesAndCunting · 27/11/2012 13:32

YANBU. Weird woman.

bigbluebus · 27/11/2012 13:36

They are not even that harsh with punishments for not handing in homework at DS's Secondary School - and that is when you did get the homework on the given day! They give you 2 days after the missed deadline and a text message to parents advising them of the missed homework - and only then if it is not handed in by the 2nd deadline do you get a detention.

The supply teacher was harsh and unfair to your DD and needs to apologise and re-instate the stars.

Original poster
freddiefrog · 27/11/2012 13:36

You have to teach the children not give a stuff about stars, if you get them great if you don't nobody died

That's fine, they're not the be all and end all, but, DD had already earned these stars and she had them removed. I think a the veryleast they should be reinstated

She can't get her lunchtime back, and the homework is now done, but DD is very cross that her stars have been removed.

Yes, the teacher should have listened to both me and DD, this is the first dealings I've had with her so I don't know if she's usually like this (DD hasn't said anything)

I'll speak to the head later at pick up time

Thanks!

OP posts:
Mosman · 27/11/2012 13:39

Honestly we used to have a little giggle on the way home from school about how daft stars were because some children especially in reception/year 1 were getting so worked up about a bloomin star chart. It removes the power to be made to feel bad about something which is actually completely meaningless.

Original poster
freddiefrog · 27/11/2012 13:40

Her reasoning for being so tough with homework deadlines is that year 6 are getting ready for high school, but even in high school they wouldn't be so harsh with homework when you're off sick

She'll end up with a class full of kids terrified of going by the time she leaves

Their normal teacher is quite lenient, they share their homework projects in class on Wednesdays so as long as its done by then, it's fine

OP posts:
Mosman · 27/11/2012 13:46

Great let the children think they are in for more of this when they get to high school that'll really build their confidence.

Startail · 27/11/2012 13:48

YANBU
Email to head, that is ridiculous.

takataka · 27/11/2012 13:49

stars are given for good behaviour
they shouldnt be removed for 'bad behaviour'
that isnt the spirit of it at all

Tailtwister · 27/11/2012 13:51

YANBU. I don't know how the teacher can justify this. I would contact the head and ask her to explain why she did it.

imnotmymum · 27/11/2012 13:51

That is very unreasonable and the teacher should see this. Your DD was ill, by all means if necessary get the homework to catch up on if need to but this is totally out of order.

imnotmymum · 27/11/2012 13:52

And agree high school would not be as harsh as this if child away ill.

ENormaSnob · 27/11/2012 13:57

Yanbu

I would be furious and making an appointment with the head.