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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

to think this teacher was really harsh?

44 replies

freddiefrog · 27/11/2012 13:14

DD is 11 and in year 6 and has had a supply teacher for the last 2 weeks

She gets homework twice a week -

Thursday - a little project which has to be done over the weekend and handed in on a Monday
Monday - numeracy which has to be handed in on Thursdays

As well as daily reading, spelling and times tables revision

So, last week DD was off school sick on Thursday and Friday, first day back yesterday.

I picked her up yesterday, chatting about her day and she tells she was given detention for all of lunch, and 10 stars removed from her chart (they use a reward system where stars they're given stars for good work/being helpful/whatever and at the end of term get to pick out of a lucky dip) for not handing in her weekend homework (she did hand the numeracy sheet in from the Monday)

To be honest, I thought DD had got the wrong end of the stick - she was off sick so hadn't had the homework to do in the first place, but DD was adamant she'd tried to explain she had been ill (which the teacher knew anyway) but her teacher insisted she stay in over lunch and do it then, so I checked with the teacher this morning, and yes, she'd been given detention and lost the stars.

I tried to explain to the teacher myself that DD had been off sick so I thought it was a bit unfair, but she was really dismissive of me too, and refused to reinstate her stars

Is it unreasonable to speak to the head? I hate all this going to the head and making a fuss shennanegans but I think it is really unfair to not get her stars back

If they had given her the homework yesterday, she would have done it last night and handed it in today (which is what I would expect to happen) but she wasn't given the opportunity

OP posts:

Suzieismyname · 27/11/2012 14:11

YANBU. Make an appointment to see the head or to see the teacher properly. Not sure what it's like at your school, but most of the time the morning can be quite frantic for the teacher, so perhaps (I'm clutching at straws here, but trying to see all sides) the teacher genuinely made a mistake...
I would be livid if it happened to my DD1!

Themumsnot · 27/11/2012 14:16

I'm a secondary teacher and even in secondary, where we expect children who are off sick to take responsiblity for finding out what work they missed, I would consider this unreasonable and unkind behaviour on the part of the teacher. Definitely speak to the head.

Original poster

freddiefrog · 27/11/2012 14:39

Thanks

I've emailed the head, outlining the whole thing and asking to see her after school.

She replied that she agreed that it was unfair and is going to speak to the teacher and then meet with me when I pick them up from after school club later.

OP posts:

echt · 27/11/2012 16:12

Glad it's worked out well. For myself, I'd be wondering why the teacher sets work to be done on the weekend. In 30+years of teaching I have never set a homework which requires weekend work, not even for exam classes.

ConfusedPixie · 27/11/2012 17:00

That is absolutely shit of the teachers, how did it work out in the end?

Original poster

freddiefrog · 27/11/2012 17:07

Ok, so I met with the head and it all got a little bit weird

Met with head before picking DDs up from club. Head said she'd spoken to teacher who assured her that DD hadn't lost any stars (removal of earned stars was against school procedures) and that DD was mistaken and she misunderstood me when I saw her this morning.

Picked up DDs, went with DD1 to her classroom to pick her bag and stuff up where she showed me the chart with her (and about 5 others) with crossed out stars.

Went back to head.

She called in teacher so we could all clarify what was what.

First up, teacher denied the whole thing, DD said no, teacher had removed stars and gave her detention, showed her the chart with the crossed out stars and teacher had confirmed with me that morning that that's what had happened

Then teacher claimed that DD was in school on the Thursday, just hadn't handed in homework in on time, we confirmed she was off via the register.

It all got a bit awkward so Head then confirmed DD's stars would be reinstated and apologised and we beat a retreat

OP posts:

SminkoPinko · 27/11/2012 17:11

OMG.Disgraceful behaviour from the teacher. I'm guessing she might not be in tomorrow! well done for sticking up for your daughter.

TiggyD · 27/11/2012 17:15

Your daughter learnt an important lesson. Sometimes the authorities are dicks.

Original poster

freddiefrog · 27/11/2012 17:19

It was all very odd

Teacher is only with us until Friday anyway (I thought it was another week but their normal teacher is back on Monday), she always seemed very nice and DD hadn't complained about her or anything.

I think she just got muddled and didn't listen to DD in the first place

But anyway, stars are back on the chart so all sorted

OP posts:

LDNmummy · 27/11/2012 17:20

"I think the teacher just cocked up, had forgotten DD was off, then refused to listen to DD or me when we tried to remonstrate with her instead of just saying 'oh, sorry' and giving DD her stars back"

Exactly what I think.

The problem with this is that it teaches your DD that even if she is good all the time, the one time something is out of her control and not her fault, she will be punished severely anyway. That means she might as well not make the effort the rest of the time because the teacher is unfair.

SminkoPinko · 27/11/2012 17:20

well quite, TiggyD!I hope the class will get a massive apology from the teacher, if she is allowed to stay or the head if not and your dd will be a heroine, ff!

LDNmummy · 27/11/2012 17:22

Just read the rest, that is so embarrassing for her.

carocaro · 27/11/2012 17:28

Good! I am so pleased for you, it mattered and it needing sorting. I have DS1 in Y6 and if they are off sick they get how ever many days they were off sick to do their homework, also if there is an issue such as a child had a family bereavment, they did not have to do it.

Since when did being not on the dot with homework with a genuine reason why mean our children will not end up captains of industry? Being on time and care and compassion should be taught in equal measure.

PessaryPam · 27/11/2012 18:21

My DD got into trouble for poor attendance despite being in hospital with appendicitis from one particularly officious and brain-dead teacher at secondary school. We queried it at parents evening with this woman and it was like talking to a plank. Unbelievable that someone could go through the degree and the training necessary to teach and still be so stupid!

YouCanBe · 27/11/2012 18:30

Oh dear, the teacher sounds awful!

MadamFolly · 27/11/2012 21:27

Wonder if she will be there tomorrow?

FellowshipOfFestiveFellows · 28/11/2012 17:46

Any update OP? Was she there today and did your dd get her stars back?

Original poster

freddiefrog · 28/11/2012 17:55

Yes and yes!

All stars back on her chart and teacher apologised to DD.

DD said that everything was fine in class as I was a bit worried there might be some ramifications for her but all was fine

This teacher finishes with us on Friday, so only 2 more days until their regular lovely teacher is back

OP posts:

toomuchmonthatendofthemoney · 28/11/2012 18:07

Just read this thread now and hurrah for you and your DD standing up and not taking her shit!!! Well done!! Teacher sounds like a cow.

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