to use a disabled toilet if I've got the buggy?

[MrsHelsBels74]

Pretty much as the thread title says, if you're out in public & need to loo but can't fit the buggy into a normal cubicle is it acceptable to take the buggy into the disabled toilet? I'd never use a disabled parking space but did this today in desperation. So, is it ok or still a no-no?

I'm intrigued at the number of people saying they would only use it if there was no disabled person waiting or if there was a queue they would give priority to the disabled person. I use a walking a frame (and cannot access a regular toilet which blows your theory about their purpose being just for wheelchairs out of the water amck5700). There have been a times when there is a line of mums with prams waiting for the disabled toilet. I have NEVER been waved to the front of the line. Never. It's always the same as when they're using the wheelchair space/disabled seats on the bus: 'don't make eye contact, don't acknowledge the disabled person's existence, because if you do you might feel obliged to change your behaviour and make way'.

parents kept coming up and trying the door, and or knocking on it

OMG, yes. I've had parents knocking and asking me how long I'm going to be or can I hurry up and such like. I'd forgotten that annoyance.

I didn't say that they were just for wheelchairs Flamin - I said that they were for use of people who required accessable facilities but that they were designed to be accessable for wheelchairs - i also said that they were of use for the infirm who needed grab bars and those that need the emergency cord. Clearly you fit into that category. However, what I am saying is that there will be people without dsabilities who require to use the accessable toilet from time to time, just as there are times that a person with a disability could use a regular toilet.

This isn't supposed to be a "them and us" it is about people in society recognising that sometimes someone may have a greater need to use a certain facility than someone else. That applies to all people regardless of disability or ability.

I have used the gents a number of times when they are those individual cubicles with wash basin etc in as well when there has been a queue for the ladies and I have a desperate toddler. But only when there aren't any gents waiting to use them. I don't see using the disabled loos in the circumstances of there being no one else waiting to use them as that different.

This isn't supposed to be a "them and us" it is about people in society recognising that sometimes someone may have a greater need to use a certain facility than someone else. That applies to all people regardless of disability or ability.

Yes but that sad fact is that there are so many people out there who feel so 'entitled' that the end result is nearly always that the vulnerable, disabled person with the most need comes last.

Flamin, I don't even walk with sticks, never will due to the nature of my disability, yet sometimes I need to use the disabled one I need the rail to pull myself up, or being breathless is making me about to pee myself.

People don't understand that you can't always see disability, just recently, a woman from the council compared me unfavourably to someone she knows who is fully disabled

I would never use a disabled toilet unless it was some sort of emergency, and managed to get by just fine with all 3 of my babies. Either I held them and did my business (perfectly possible!) or I found somewhere with a row of cubicles and went to the end one, with the buggy outside where I could see it. I gambled that in the 30 seconds it took me to do a wee the baby would be safe.

It would be interesting to know if there has ever been even one single case of a baby being snatched from a ladies' loo. Surely the risk is pretty infinitesimal!

the thing is that the people who justify to themselves using a disabled loo, don't think it through,

Because if they did they would realise that inevitable at some point they themselves or a family member is going to be on the other side of the situation, and as they are adding the culture of using the only disabled loo available, they won't be able to complain when their bodily fluids end up all over them.

or do you think they might suddenly have a light bulb moment and realise they have been selfish, taking advantage of a facility put there for people who really need it?

It takes a lot of nerve to leave the house when you have a disability, you have to pre think every eventuality, the instant access to loos features very high up on disabled people list, most people choose not to comprehend how important that is .

I'd rather be labelled disabled than ignorant.

I'd be terrified to leave DC in the buggy outside when I went to the loo. An I the only one who'd be scared of having a baby abducted?

Some disabilities mean you really can't wait.

I have a neurological disorder that needs 4 weekly hospital treatment. For 3 weeks I can walk (a bit), use normal loos, ordinary parking spaces. For the other week I'm in a wheelchair, using my blue badge, queueing with the big buggies at the loo.

For a week a month I have no pelvic sensation, I can't tell if I need. I have to go by the clock, or I wet/soil.

That, to my mind, is more important than can you get your huge pram into the toilets. Maybe you should have thought that through, got yourself a wee folding stroller for shopping days.

I'm sorry, I'm probably BUR. but unless you have actually needed the disabled facilities (not just found them more convenient), you really don't get it!

People don't understand that you can't always see disability

Indeed. I'm kind of dreading when my baby comes along. I won't be able to push a pram and use my walking frame. We've had to be very careful in our choice of pram because it will also be my walking frame (making sure the brakes are hand operated rather than foot operated for example or that it can support my weight when I wobble). The walking frame has been a big visible clue for considerate people who do want to do the right thing. I'm scared of being back in the dark days pre-frame where my disability was completely invisible. :(

Use the big buggy to block the door of the last cubical in the row. No-one is going to look.

For me it's not about babies being abducted so much as random children, usually those who havent yet washed their hands wanting to give my baby a good prod or stick their fingers in her mouth.

And I'm fairly sure that children being abducted from hotel rooms is fairly uncommon but god forbid you suggest leaving a child alone is ok on the basis that it would be unlikely for something to happen!

I'm that wanting to have a pee when out of the house but also being mindful of my children's safety makes me selfish and ignorant!

I think the case of visible disability is an interesting one. I was put in a situation yesterday I still feel bad about.

I work in a university, and we don't have staff toilets - it's the same toilets for all. I have Crohns and was having a bit of a bad day with it yesterday. I rushed to the loo in the afternoon, but there was a queue of about 4 or 5 people. As I was worried about an accident, I went to the disabled loo next door. Whilst I was in there, someone rattled the door twice. When I opened the door to leave, a student with a walking frame (who I see around campus regularly) barged into me and said she had been waiting and I was selfish.

I was kind of dumbstruck and just let her past. I wish I'd said to her all disabilities aren't visible, but I was rather taken aback. In fairness, she couldn't use any of the other cubicles because they are so small, but was I in the wrong there? Sorry - a bit off topic...

no you weren't Casper. You should have said that all disabilities aren't visible. Crohns is a serious disability.

I have never come across a baby change table that wasn't in the same cubicle as the toilet for disabled people other than in John Lewis. They are pretty much always the same room, so where are you supposed to change your baby if not in there?

It rarely comes up that i need to use the toilet out (i avoid it if at all possible!) but when it has if I only have children in a buggy with me (single or double) i leave them outside the cubicle and nip in. BUT if i have the older ones with me (the 5 and 3 year old) I go in the disabled loo simply because i do not trust them to stay put and not in the case of my ds start licking the walls (whole other thread!).

I just want to state I will always try to use the normal loos wherever possible, and if anyone else was waiting for a disabled loo I would let them go in front of me. But I physically could not get the buggy into the room where I was today, and I am not happy to leave the buggy out of sight. I was absolutely bursting to go, if I'd had to get the baby out of the buggy, fold it up, manhandle it into the loos then deal with the baby whilst getting myself ready to pee I'd have probably wet myself. Add into that that I then discovered I needed to use one of the just bought tampons which were at the bottom of the shopping bag.

I totally accept that a disabled person's needs to outweighs mine, and that I chose to have children, but do my needs not exist at all?

Really, you'd leave the buggy outside carry a baby in use the loo whilst carrying baby? What do you do with the baby if you need to change tampon etc?

Sometimes, mainly during that time of the month. Other times I choose the toilet furthest away from the entrance open door, go in, yam buggy in door, have a wee. Essentially I just pee in front of everyone. Post birth things like that seem less important somehow. Anyway, if Im not risking the disabled loo wtf am I supposed to do?!

I would only use one if it was the only toilets with the baby change in, as then it is a bit more multi purpose if that makes sense.

If it is purely a disabled toilet I wouldn't use it. It's a PITA at times but the toilet wasn't intended for that use.

of course a mum with a buggy should use it..... so what if a disabled person has to wait/que....ends up wetting them selves.
so what if they are in a wheelchair and that gets soaked. pesky disabled people should stay at home, how dare they want to use a disabled toilet.
wow next thing they will want to use the wheelchair space on a bus.....disgusting

Ok 2 kids under 3 here, holw on earth can you juggle them whilst changing a tampon. I would absolutely not change tampon with a door to public toilet open and kids in double buggy. OMG!