to use a disabled toilet if I've got the buggy?

[MrsHelsBels74]

Pretty much as the thread title says, if you're out in public & need to loo but can't fit the buggy into a normal cubicle is it acceptable to take the buggy into the disabled toilet? I'd never use a disabled parking space but did this today in desperation. So, is it ok or still a no-no?

I should know not to click on these threads. Same old tripe wheeled out based on you being able to JUDGE someone as disabled.

It's unthinking & rather arrogant. as someone said earlier, we don't wear signs do you can tell - in fact, it's non of your business & certainly not your right to judge how worthy someone is of using facilities, be it chairs, loos or parking spaces.

I dont care if parents use disabled loos, as long as they don't take forever, and as long as they don't give ME a dirty look when they come out as I often don't have a buggy & refuse to apply a label to myself to satisfy nosiness.

lady

It would not cost much money to adapt most toilets so that more people could access them... Higher loos and handrails are pence for big companies but instead they have to tick a box... Personally have issues with why space can't be better utilised in some places to have very few cubicles and more single loos. Would prevent the issue of unaccompanied kids in toilets too - there was another report last month of a boy sexually assaulted in ASDA toilets because he was shopping with him mum so was in the loo alone.

Big concert venues, sport arenas and big shopping centres might need a large number of loos but your local Tesco doesn't.

As for 'look who is looking guilty' well when I was tutted at for using a disabled loo I was actually on home leave from hospital and had been without chair for 3 days. I couldn't get off a toilet without rails but I wasnt 'disabled' as I was going to recover. I could also manage without crutches for short distances and I had...
I looked guilty and I know I did but had a genuine need to use that loo.

I agree with you 100% DayShift. A lot of public toilets in the newer shopping centres do have larger cubicles, they are usually at the end of the row. I find that these are cleaner because people don't like to walk that far. They are not planned very well, especially ladies toilets.

Child abductions are rare, but they do happen.
babies411.com/infant-news/news/preventing-infant-abductions.html

^Yes Ghost, urban myth.
Doesnt stop it being repeated as fact though does it?^

No it doesn't, but since I'm not the one repeating it I don't see why there's a problem?

As I said at the start of the tread, I am disabled and I have no problem with a mother and a baby using the disabled loos. Tbh, I have never, ever had to wait to go into a disabled toilet. It's all about being pleasant to people - a little bit of give and take. I treat people how I would like to be treated.

I am also pretty sure that the terminology has changed now and the term "disabled" toilet is outdated these days - not sure what it is, but the term "easy access" comes to mind.

I think you misunderstood what I meant nailak - what I meant was that when we find the disabled toilet full (which does happen - rarely full with a disabled person I have to say) my son will usually kick off. So I take all 5 foot 6 of him into the ladies to give the tut tut brigade the chance to come on here and start a thread about teenage boys being in ladies toilets.

So you might have merrily changed your baby's nappy confident they no disabled person had been affected when in fact they were next door being tutted at.

As I said before if there's no choice use one, but please don't use one because it's marginally easier. And please don't buy a RADAR key just so you can get your oversized buggy into a disabled toilet (you = one here obviously).

I'm not trying to be funny, but what happens if two disabled (by that I mean wheelchair users) turn up at the same time...who gives way to who? Or does it then become acceptable to wait a few moments?
And how do we define disabled? Blue badge holders? My father in law has a blue badge due to his heart complaint, but is quite able to use public toilets...and probably wouldn't even dream of using the "disabled" toilets.
I think the majority of mothers with buggies are as quick as they can be be, for fear of being given a 'telling off' by a disabled user.

It's true that you are unlikely to come out of a disabled toilet to find a disabled person waiting but what if you do? 99 times out of a hundred you can happily use the disabled toilet and go on your way but one day you might find you've caused someone unneeded pain or embarrassment but being so selfish.

Last year I took my church youth group on a trip to the cinema. With us was a 14 year old girl who is an essential wheelchair user (she is paralysed from the waist down). There is one disabled toilet (the baby change is separate). It was occupied. All the other children went to use the regular toilets and by the time they had all finished and returned (about 12 children so none of this 30 second myth!) we were still waiting with this girl for the disabled toilet.

After waiting for well over 5 minutes she wet herself. Aged 14 in a crowded cinema foyer in front of a dozen of her teenage friends. She, the chair and the carpet around her were obviously soaking and everyone was staring.

Then the toilet door opened and it was a mum with a double buggy and 2 other small children. Someone who would probably find it very inconvenient to use the ladies and had probably used the disabled facilities countless times without incident. From the look of total horror on her face I doubt she's done it since!

I can see why people want to use a free toilet - but I just don't think it's worth the possible consequences to a disabled person.

I hate to repeat myself 3 times, but if you don't want/or can't leave your baby outside in their pram/buggy, and it won't fit in the toilet - can you not take the baby out? put baby on mat on floor or hold if you are more dextrous than me!

No I don't have the link.

I was in the asda at the time, it got locked down an no-one was allowed to leave or enter. We were told that a little girl had been taken.

Obviously you don't believe me, not that I care. But you wouldn't would you, because it suits you not to believe me and it suits you to pretend that children never get abducted and it's perfectly safe to leave babies alone outside.

Funny how the same people expecting this to happen, are the ones that bang on about not leaving children unattended.

Maniac - whilst that really is awful, it could have been a disabled person already using the toilet. The same thing would have happened then. Banning mums from using them isn't going to ensure they're always empty.

Whatever people say on this thread, the wider issue is that whatever the rights and wrongs, parents will carry on using disabled loos as long as changing tables are situated in them, which is why I think it would be worth lobbying major shops to install proper parents rooms.

I think one of the issues is that mums and dads are usually hardwired not to let their babies out of their sight, so the idea of leaving the baby outside the cubicle is not going to be popular. Most women are also too bashful to leave cubicle doors open while using the loo, especially at time of the month, as mentioned above.
When we have babies, we are constantly reminded of the importance of good hygiene, as babies don't have properly developed immune systems. So I don't think too many mums, having got used to regular hand sanitising, are likely to put babies on the floor of public toilets, as suggested upthread. Older babies and toddlers let loose in small cubicles are likely to be crawling or walking around grabbing things - not a good idea around public loos, sanitary bins and syringe disposal units. The sling idea only works with a small baby.

It's a tough one...

Lots of hypocrisy in this thread.

NEVER LEAVE YOUR CHILD UNATTENDED IN PUBLIC - yet leave them in a pram where you can't see, in a public bathroom

YOU MUST ALWAYS WASH YOUR HANDS AFTER USING THE LOO - yet women are expected to wipe themselves and change tampons whilst holding a baby, or to leave the baby on a loo floor.

Shocking.

I'm surprised this seems to be more of an issue rather than less compared to when my children were little, these days it is so much easier to do the shopping online.

Surely most of the time any shopping in person can wait until you can go with someone else or leave your child with someone else, anything urgent could be done fast enough that you don't need a loo-stop (or if you do then you probably do have a medical need yourself).

I am however speaking as someone who has mobility problems and a job so evening online shopping is my usual way, maybe I am the odd one.

some public toilets have baby seats attached to the inside if toilet door that you can fold down and strap your baby into.

and who bangs on about not leaving their children on other threads?

my children get left when appropriate i e the individual.situation and dependent upon the individual child.

5madthings - you've missed them? It's always being said. The not leaving the pram occupied in the garden, the not letting them in the garden out of your site, the not leaving them in a hotel unoccupied, etc etc.

Ghostship - yes, it could have been a disabled person and it would still have been awful but there would have been nothing for the other disabled person to feel bad about. It would have been very unfortunate, nothing more.

But this woman found that she had (unintentionally) humiliated a teenager purely for the sake of convenience not need.

And as I imagine there were about 50 times more young families than there were disabled people in the place at the time, the chances of the toilet being genuinely needed by two people simulataneously would have been pretty low.

most parents have wet wipes they could use to wipe their hands.

i eouldnt put a crawling baby on the floor but you could put a carrier bag down, then change mat and lay a non mobile baby down i guess? and when fi.ished wpie hands with wet wipes before picking up baby.

i always left them strappef in pram ir had them in the sling when very little.

MrsDeVere, it doesnt stop you washing your hands. But since you've already spread the germs to your baby from holding it whilst trying to do 'loo things', its a bit of a moot point.

And like we've said, a lot of the time it isn't about leaving them on the otherside of the door. Seriously how many public toilets have you been in? The majority I've seen have rows of cubicles, not enough room to fit a pram down.

I don't really see why, just because I have a baby, I should become a hermit in my own home and never visit my town centre except for very quick errands just because I can stay in and get everything on the internet. It isn't just about shopping - sometimes I need to go to the post office or the library or various other town centre buildings. I can't leave my child with someone else - he is somewhat dependant on me as a source of nutrition. And anyway, why shouldn't babies be able to go into town the same as anyone else?

Living in a fairly small town we are unlikely to ever have these fancy family toilets that you get in larger shopping centres. When we do I will be using them as that is what I do when I go somewhere that does have them. Until that time I will continue using the facilities provided that are accessible. Usually they are the only hygienic place provided to change a baby in any case.

I have been in Very few you couldn't get a pram into. Considering the amount of people on this thread who have said they have done it many a time that shows that in most cases it is possible