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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To think my dinner party menu was better?

148 replies

TacticalWheelbarrow · 22/11/2012 16:55

A few weeks ago I invited a couple who have been friends with DH and I for years. Unfortunately the wife has been made redundant recently and they have been a bit stressed out. I offered to have them round for dinner and they seemed really up for it. So I for the evening I cooked:
Starter-homemade potato skins with bacon, cheese and mushrooms with a side salad.
Main- chicken fajitas with guacamole, sour cream, cheese and salsa (all in individual pots so everyone could help themselves) with nachos and jalapeños.
Dessert- homemade treacle tart (made by DH) and ice cream.

They picked at everything so I asked if it was ok and they turned round and said they had eaten a roast dinner before they had come. Shock

So they invited us round theirs for a dinner party and they served.
Starter- scallops which is fine yum. But it was one scallop with a purée thing, all very decorative but still one small scallop.
Main- a terracotta pot with layers of Aubergine, tomatoes, red onions and other veg in a creamy sauce with a small bit of salmon in soy sauce. Really nice but still really tiny portion.
Dessert- a chocolate mousse thing, lovely but served to us in a shot glass.
It was food that you get at one of them ridiculously expensive restaurants.
Now I had a good time and the food was nice but I was pissed off at the husband's comments. He said "it's amazing what you can do when you put your mind to it" and "we understand that you were pushed for time having two kids but your food was better than we expected." basically dropping hints about my food. He even made a dig about our wine when he brought out this expensive stuff and said "this may be a bit stronger for people who are used to echo falls". Hmm
It made me feel very uncomfortable.

Aibu to think well actually what I cooked was better than the cordon bleu (sp?) stuff they served?

OP posts:
StiffyByng · 23/11/2012 08:42

We are foodie types who like a bit of poncery but we pretty much get that in restaurants. Even other foodie friends serve more down to earth food for dinner-eg last weekend we were served salad with tarragon mayonnaise for a starter, beef stew with mash for main course, creme brûlée for pudding and a couple of stinky cheeses. So I'd be quite Hmm at your friends' try-too-hard offerings, especially in those quantities. It does sound more refained but also a bit annoying-don't want small pots on my plate. Yours sounds like an informal dinner with friends.

But along with everyone else, I think your friends sound insufferable cunts.

musicalendorphins · 23/11/2012 08:43

Oh just realized you said fajita's, not enchilada's. I love them both equally though!

ThePlatypusAlwaysTriumphs · 23/11/2012 08:49

they (especially the DH) sound like pretentious oiks. 1 scallop??? Sounds a bit fur coat and nae knickers to me!

I love cooking (and eating!), and although some of their menu sounds nice (if in small quantity) I would much have preferred the informal-ness of yours, and would feel far more relaxed. I would have liked to go to theirs, however, just to watch my DH's face when served aubergine Grin!!

And I drink anything

FivesAndNorks · 23/11/2012 09:02

OK I have figured ot that I never want to go to a "dinner party". I like going to dinner with my friends- nice food, decent portions with nothing off limits due to an unspoken rule.

PessaryPam · 23/11/2012 09:07

Your food sounds lovely, I think your 'friends' have lost sight of the point of people eating together, it's a social bonding experience, not a chance to practice one-upmanship.

riveroise · 23/11/2012 09:12

As I prefer Mexican cuisine, in more substantial portions (washed down with tequila-based cocktails) my vote is with your dinner. Smile

Your pals are acting like "ponces". Do they live in a new-build house stuffed with fancy furnishings like swagged gauze curtains and pebbles-n-wobbly-twigs-shit? Maybe they've been watching "Come dine with me" too much.

sleeplessinsuburbia · 23/11/2012 09:51

The op said she invited friends round to dinner, not a dinner party.
I thought dinner parties died out in the '90s.
The snobbery on this thread is amazing.

SpinningBirdKick · 23/11/2012 09:53

Tactical - your meal sounds lovely- pls invite me round for fajitas and I'll bring the Tequila!! Grin

I agree with the other posters that their menu as more "dinner party"- but their manner was very rude- it comes across as pretentious- I don't think that having friends around for an informal meal means that you have to do tossy little posh servings of food (an acquaintance of mine buys posh ready meal stuff from M&S and serves it up as her own, then looks down her nose at other peoples home made efforts! Shock)

Time to get some new friends, I think!

Jins · 23/11/2012 10:06

an acquaintance of mine buys posh ready meal stuff from M&S and serves it up as her own

Fool! Anyone can spot an M&S meal a mile off. You need to go for the posh frozen meals in garden centres or farm shops and decant them into your own dishes.

Trills · 23/11/2012 10:10

Forget their posh menu - why did they have a roast dinner before they came round to yours when you had clearly stated that they were invited to come and be fed?

MarshaBrady · 23/11/2012 10:13

lol at Slubber and the statement beads.

Dinner parties are funny old things aren't they.

GreenEggsAndNichts · 23/11/2012 10:21

You say you'll pull out the cookbook next time. Please, please let there be no "next time" with these people. Seriously. He sounds the type who will never be satisfied. Or, worse, if you cook something fancy next time, he'll be smug about having changed your ways.

FWIW I love your menu but probably wouldn't have served it. I'd have served something between yours and his. (I don't mind fancy and overdone, but I can't abide by sending people away hungry after having made 3 courses, ffs!) I wouldn't have judged fajitas. :)

MadameCastafiore · 23/11/2012 10:26

Sorry but I would have preferred their food - yours is every day food that we would have at home - if I am invited out to dinner I expect a little more effort having gone into the meal and would prefer quality over quantity (although Dh would have been starving!!).

As for the wine - DH exports the stuff and really likes 'proper' wine (I rarely drink the stuff so couldn't give a stuff and would have preferred a G&T) but he would know to just drink whatever was on offer with good grace and not try and make a point.

So there food sounds better and their wine too (in DHs opinion) but you sound like much nicer people.

Chandon · 23/11/2012 10:30

I must say yours sounds nice, but like the sort of thing that is very rich and heavy ( have a weak stomach) and would hive me heartburn ( annoying weak stomach).

Theirs sounds fancy and nice but possibly leaves one peckish...hmmm

They also sound like wankers, and you sound nice, so I would have rather come to yours.

I would avoid them like the plague if I were you, and just invite nice friends from now on!

Slubberdegullion · 23/11/2012 10:32

yy Marsha. But I do love a good dinner party. If nothing else at dinner parties there is usually cheese, and port. I like cheese and port. And then nice coffee and an upmarket mint.

FivesAndNorks · 23/11/2012 10:32

Oh please invite them round again. Starter - orange juice in a wineglass. Main course - findus crispy pancakes, chipped potatoes with a tomato jus and water boiled petits pois. Dessert - butterscotch angel delight. Cheese board - choice of baby bel or laughing cow. Wine - blue nun.

FivesAndNorks · 23/11/2012 10:33

Dont forget a little doily for the top of the wine glass

Slubberdegullion · 23/11/2012 10:33

Am also with Trills re why on earth did they eat a roast dinner before they came?

Sound like crazers to me.

Jins · 23/11/2012 10:35

I usually eat before going out for a meal but in my defence it's because I'm a coeliac with complex intolerances. I'd never eat a roast dinner beforehand and I'd never feed DH first as I need him to hoover up the stuff on my plate when nobody is looking Grin

soverylucky · 23/11/2012 10:35

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Chandon · 23/11/2012 10:38

Now maybe it is time to advise you on a successful MN dinner party strategy.

For starters, buy pombears, put in bowl, serve, smile

Then tomoato soup (Heinz) , whilst giggling maniacaly

Forgot what is next, but make sure you slap their bums on their way out!

Then report back to us ( or maybe they will)

Vodkapleasenurse · 23/11/2012 10:40

Ooh I love fajitas and echo falls Blush, your friends sound very snobby.

fuzzpig · 23/11/2012 10:41

They are pretentious twats and very very rude! They ate a roast dinner before they came FFS!

Fajitas is the kind of thing we do when we have company. Because it is about the company, not showing off our culinary skills or making some kind of statement! And we don't drink wine.

Your meal sounds lovely. Not dinner partyish but who cares?

GreeenFingers · 23/11/2012 10:42

Makes me think of Harry Enfileds " We are considerablly richer than you" sketch.What a pair of ungratefull tossers.
Do they have a cobblecrete drive with iron gates to keep out the "riff raff"?
You sound like lovely warm, generous hosts. Your meal was about "food for friends" unlike their " nibbles for knobs".

GetorfsaMotherfuckingMorrisMan · 23/11/2012 10:53

Is he a short man?